I have had two expensive gifts, a ring and a watch during a 7 year relationship, however I have paid for all our entertainment, theatres shows etc and he has paid for meals and fares. I have bought lots of his clothes and a camera plus lots of other bits.
2007-03-25 00:17:13 · 42 answers · asked by ann b 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
If it becomes an issue & its easier to just part with them, then yes, if there is no issue, then probably not.
In that situation, I have been known to hand back absolutely everything that might remind me about the person or relationship but other people thought I was mad for it!! I have also seen people take things or demand things be given back purely out of spite. Depends I guess, on your situation.
If your ex demands you return them, then you just have to think about whether you want to spend your energy arguing about it by saying who bought what throughout the relationship or if it will be of more benifit to yourself to just hand them over.
Seeing that you placed this question in the weddings category, one can only assume you mean an engagement ring. Again, I think it depends on the situation. I broke up with my fiance & he didnt want the ring back but people in his life did so he asked for it back. When I tried to give it back, he said no keep it! So be sure you know the reasons for him wanting it back. If he doesnt ask for it back then hang on to it, you will find a use for it one day, a gift to a friend, ebay or just for sentimental reasons. Keep the watch, whats he going to do with a womans watch anyways.
2007-03-25 00:29:28 · answer #1 · answered by Mrs D 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
If it's an engagement ring..and you did not get married, you should give the ring back. It's seen as a promise to wear the ring..which you do not intend to keep. Other gifts, you should keep if single, if married and in a community property situation..you might have legal battles if the items are extremely valuable. If the items are not paid for, you might consider being nice and letting go of them...but you are not under any obligation (so says the "Peoples Court")
If you have wedding gifts from other people and a wedding did not take place..it is proper to return them.
If you keep...place the items in an attic or out of the way place and someday..they will probably be nice memories, really!...(it might take awhile...)
2007-03-26 17:21:11 · answer #2 · answered by Jennifer B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A gift is yours to keep, just as he doesn't have to return any gifts you gave him.
An engagement ring however is different. It is a promise to get married. Depending on where you live there are different laws about what should be done with the ring if the relationship ends. Some places require you to give it back. Some places take into consideration who ended the relationship.
Personally, I think you should return the engagement ring unless he has told you he wants you to have it. Why would you want a reminder of a relationship that turned sour?
2007-03-25 00:27:47 · answer #3 · answered by QT 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
When I split up with my boyfriend of almost 3 years I did give him back the ring he had bought me. It wasn't an engagement ring though, it was an eternity ring. I gave it back because I didn't want it & had no interest in whether I could make money selling it, I didn't want the reminder of the relationship.
Generally I would say that a gift is a gift, it's up to you what you want to do, but I prefer to get rid of things that may remind me of an ex.
2007-03-25 06:26:35 · answer #4 · answered by Lola G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the fact that you try to justify something with what you spent is very odd. You want them, keep them. As long as it is not an engagement ring, they were gifts that you can keep. Giving them back will be insulting if it is done the wrong way. But let me tell you this, dont ever try to say things like i paid for meals and theater etc. You are the man, that is what you are supposed to do. You will only make yourself look like a fool.
Keep the items, get on with your life, watch what you say.
2007-03-25 00:39:33 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
If they were gifts then keep them after all you are not asking for the clothes and camera back off him are you?
The only item i think should ever be returned is engagement rings.
A gift is a gift so keep it.
2007-03-25 02:31:17 · answer #6 · answered by laplandfan 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No they were gifts so they are yours. Also the camera as you paid for it is yours and any other bits that you paid for are yours (however I would let him keep the clothes that you brought for him as they were gifts too him) likewise anything that he brought would belong to him. However things that were jointly brought you will have to come to some agreement bout them. Hopefully you can do this in a peacefully manner without it all getting ugly
2007-03-25 02:07:45 · answer #7 · answered by Baps . 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why would someone want to keep all the things they were given in the relationship if it ended on bad terms? Maybe based on greed or to spite the other person.
I think the things would a constant and negative reminder of that person. Personally, I would return the items or dump the things in the garbage without telling the person.
2007-03-25 01:08:03 · answer #8 · answered by isbros 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If it's an engagement ring, it's considered to proper etiquette to return it--in fact California apparently has a law on that point. Even without a law, you should return an engagement ring, because you can't/won/t fulfill the condition attached to it--i.e. marriage. But--you do NOT have to do so in any state that I am aware of except perhaps California. Once a gift is given, it is the property of the recipient.
2007-03-25 00:23:25 · answer #9 · answered by David M 7 · 7⤊ 0⤋
Sounds as if you are trying to convince yourself that it's OK to keep everything. The least you can do is give him back the ring, an international sign in any language the relationship is over.
2007-03-25 02:29:08 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋