trying to "change" ur boyfriend for the better.. or letting them do what they do even if though its bad just because they enjoy it (like u'd rather see them happy more than anything..)??
..okay i asked this before so i think i should explain myself .. my boyfriend drinks abit and i know its bad for him and in a sense he knows it as well except he likes it and says it makes him feel better.. i know he has better alternatives but i dont want to have to get him to stop because its one of his attributes, but if i dont.. then how horrible would it be if something had to happen???
thnx for ur answers guys
2007-03-25 00:11:28 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
uhm.. he has really high blood pressure aswell and isnt good with dealing with anger and stuff... so yah .. i worry bout him sometimes
2007-03-25 00:54:20 · update #1
First of all, how can getting drunk be an attribute??? Do you really know the meaning? Second, it must really be bothering you because you say you have posted this before.
Both are equally bad, but in different ways and you're screwed either way. If you tell him that his drinking is bothering you, then you'll come across as a bi*ch and if you say nothing and let him do what he wants and something happens, he'll be upset with you because you didn't say anything.
If you want to spend your time with a drunk, then don't say anything to him. Drinking causes severe personality changes and if done long enough, also causes irreversible internal organ damage. Drinking might be fun for now, but in the long run it can interfere with holding down a job.
I have nothing against drinking in moderation, but many are not able to drink in moderation.
2007-03-25 00:39:04 · answer #1 · answered by Pom♥Mom Spay and Neuter 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't change a man (unless he's in diapers). Don't even try. If he's drinking too much and it's detrimental to your relationship, you need to tell him the two of you aren't suited and it's best if you both moved on and found more compatible partners.
If you're not worried to that degree, stay with him, but know that his drinking habits may never change. If he needs a drink to make him feel better, then he's heading towards alcoholism.
Good luck, hope you make the right decision.
2007-03-25 07:23:25 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I can give you some advice. He is a drinker and your not going to change it. The best thing that you can do is to ask him to not drink as much. From my experience, I have a fiancee that used to drink 4-5 cases (12 packs) a night when i first got with him. He is down to maybe 1 case in month. You may just want to ask him to cut down. This will make him gradulatly not want that much beer. As soon as you get drunk you can drink like a fish and that is why he drinks so much. Talk with him. He is your boyfriend. Good luck!
2007-03-25 07:29:17 · answer #3 · answered by fxysxysrkly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well im guessing hes young? Most fellas will drink a bit but it should calm down as he gets older.
Unless hes drinking every day? In that case u need to ask him to stop because he could be n alcoholic
2007-03-25 07:15:29 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The fact that you are asking this question tells people that you don't like the current situation so i say leave him. You can't change him and even if you could it may not last. Find someone who seldom drinks or doesn't drink at all.
2007-03-25 07:18:04 · answer #5 · answered by LORD Z 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are an enabler. You want to take care of him, make him feel better. get him some treatment of you'll forever be broke, and he'll love the bottle more than you. Print this out, and keep it in someplace safe and see if it is true 10 years from now.
Seriously.
Many of my family are alcoholics. Go to al-anon. You'll learn.
2007-03-25 07:16:48 · answer #6 · answered by A Military Veteran 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok... A drink don't make you feel better,i had alcohol problems and i know what's all about!It just make you forget things and see the world different for a while...How does he treat you when his drunk!?Would you like to stay all your life next to an alcoholic?Try to explain to him that he needs help and that if he loves you he should quit!hope you'll be fine..take care!
2007-03-25 07:19:59 · answer #7 · answered by sauvage 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Best thing to do is help him to change if he is willing to. don't force him to.
Ask him if likes the drinking, find out if it's an addiction, then help and support him.
Also remember, that if you are helping there will be relapses, it's a way of life, hang in there.
2007-03-25 07:15:58 · answer #8 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he won't change for you now, he probably never will. Don't get involved with someone trying to change them. Hardly ever works. If you're important to him, he'll change for you when you ask. If you gotta nag him, he's not gonna. Total change may take time, look for improvement first. Give him credit for trying, if he does.
2007-03-25 07:19:45 · answer #9 · answered by slert1985 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If u wants yr b/f to give in to u everytime its sounds damn ridicious.if u want to change his habits etc.honestlly his BEST option is to change and find himself a much more understanding,loving and willing to accept him to be his NEW g/f.
2007-03-25 07:37:20 · answer #10 · answered by chasen54 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋