Im 21yrs old this is my fourth pregnancy, it came as a shock. I had my first very young then when i got married we later had our second, well 4 mos after baby 2 we found out we was expecting again(was using birth control-nuvaring) well 5 mos after baby 3 here we go again( using birth control again-the pill waiting on iud to come in because the dr wouldn't tie my tubes & using withdrawl) Im so stressed i dont know what to do. I know i dont need another kid & im not up for adoption or abortion cause ive give 3 kids a chance why not the fourth?! Im in a bad situation please help me i need someone to help me to give me advice, please don't be mean! Thank you all soo much and God bless!!!!
2007-03-24 13:59:01 · 9 answers · asked by brittany 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
im responding to the last answer! its not that i dont want my tubes ties cause I do its just that my doctor and his associates wont tie your tubes til you are 25!! to the others thank you all sooo very much!! Its really nice having some advice without ppl downing me for my situation. you are all blessings from God! thank you again!
2007-03-25 03:07:32 · update #1
I'm so sorry that you're stressing right now, and it's totally understandable. I wish I could reach out and give you a big hug and tell you that everythings going to be alright, because it is! you may not see things the same way I see them right now, but someday you will. you must be a wonderful mom because God has decided to bless you with the privilege of carrying, giving birth to, and raising another little person who's going to grow up and bring you so much joy and happiness. and you're having your children while you're still young and can really enjoy them. some people wait until they're really too old to be having children, and then they can't truly enjoy them because they can't get out and run and play with them the way you'll be able to. I know that you're feeling overwhelmed right now, but once the shock wears off, you are going to be just fine, and you're going to get through this pregnancy and have a happy, healthy, beautiful baby.
the last thing that you need to be doing right now is stressing. it's bad for you and it's bad for your baby. just know that things are going to be just fine. try taking some deep breaths, and let yourself relax. and just one more thing that you should consider doing is finding a different doctor. when you have this baby, I'm sure you'll want to get your tubes tied. and I would make sure that I had a doctor who would be willing to do that immediately after having this little one.
Best Wishes, and I will certainly keep you in my prayers.
2007-03-24 14:49:26 · answer #1 · answered by atiana 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
First off after this one make the doctor tie your tubes, if he wont do it find another doctor, they have no right to reject you of that. I heard all the excuses from my doctors (oh youre too young, you dont have enough kids..blah blah blah). I finally broke down and told them look you work for me you do what I want or I take my money some where else.
Now onto this 4th child. If you really do not want it or cant take care of it like it should be. The seriously think about adoption. They have so many options open now where you can be a part of the childs life (as an aunt and uncle, or just a family friend) until the child is old enough to know the truth. There are so many people in the world who cant have children, it would be a shame not to help one of them out if you could. You are thinking of it as not giving them a chance, BUT really you miay be giving them a better chance. I know how stressful children are and having 3 all around the same age, and a 4th on the way can make you feel like you are losing your mind. Do what you think is the best but if you really do not want this child dont have it and grow to resent it, instead of giving it to someone who would take care of and love it like their own. I am totally agaist abortion so I am not even going to advise that to you. I know some of this may seem a little harsh but I dont mean to be I just think you should seriously think about this.
2007-03-24 14:09:24 · answer #2 · answered by chickfromthelotuspod 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know that this will be hard for you but you can do it! I just found out I am having another baby and my first is now 8 months like you a lot closer then I would have liked,But after talking with my hubby we decided that when we have this one he would go and get snipped. You should see if your hubby would do that. It's a better form of birth control for you seeing as when you were taking the pill it didn't work. And if he's a little scared tell him it's reversible if you want another one later on and it doesn't make him less of a man. Takes 15 min and for you would be 2 days in the hospital almost like you had another baby when you get home (needing his help more) and he would have to care for the kids and you all alone if you have your tubes tied. (that was my argument to my hubby! LOL!) Best Of Luck!
2007-03-24 15:09:42 · answer #3 · answered by Kellie R 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you are against adoption and abortion you have no other option than to have your 4th child. If you don't want #5 I would have a serious talk with your doctor about having your tubes tied. If that dr. won't do it seek a 2nd opinion, or 3rd opinion, whatever it takes. If no one will tie them get on some birth control AND use a condom.
Good luck.
2007-03-24 14:05:24 · answer #4 · answered by PK211 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hi, become a mother is a blessing. And having your own baby is another blessing. Treasure them with you. As what is given to you now is from God. And when God give you someone to take care, He will also give you way out on how to look after all the children.
Be happy and do not stress, as stress is not good for expecting mother. Is there any mother groups around your area?
Anyway, all the best, and be happy. Say a prayer, and talk to God everyday and all the time.
All the best
2007-03-24 14:05:14 · answer #5 · answered by flower 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel my last pregnancy was on bc and a surprise. What about hubby getting snipped. Also their are support groups for you. I hope you feel better. Take a deep breath and relax. You and the baby and the children don't need it. Tell the dr you want him to pay for it if he won't tie your tubes. Tell him your completely serious cause it is not your fault that bc don't work for you.
2007-03-24 14:04:40 · answer #6 · answered by littledueceb 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Brittany, calm down please! While you are right that having a 4th child at 21 is a lot on your plate, you seem to be resigned to keeping it! If you don't want to put the baby up for adoption, don't worry, you will get through all of this. It must seem overwhelming but remember, you've got raging hormones and right now you mostly need to take care of yourself emotionally. Have you a minister to talk to? Family to help with the kids? Be well and you are in my thoughts.
2007-03-24 14:07:37 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You already said it: you do not want an abortion or adoption and why not a fourth. You will need a lot of help, but you love children and you will be able to have the fourth! And you should have yourself operated if you do not want any more children. Good Luck and heads up, everything will turn out right, I hope you have your husbands help as well.
2007-03-24 14:05:12 · answer #8 · answered by Julia E 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not being mean but if you seen that with the last one BC didn't work, what made you think this could not happen again? You should have used a condom too, knowing how fertile you are. And that does not make since that the doc would not tie your tubes.
2007-03-24 17:30:14 · answer #9 · answered by andrea k 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋