im feeling so hurt and so sad and upset .. that after all 9 months with the guy i believed and loved with all my heart..
everything all the dreams of future is not there now..
he is dating around to see if it helps him to get over me he said he wants to go back to the way he was before i met him.
he says he doesnt feel anything for them and its not helping but he somehow knows he will get over me even though that he says he isnt sure what he wants says that he has feelings for me but dont love me, says he misses me alot but dont want to be with me.. he says he will hurt alot and that it hurts now knowing that i'll be with someone else but he'll get over it!
im so stupid i even spoke to him on the phone said its me now or never that i dont want to lose what we had that noone will love him like me. He says he isnt 100% sure he wants to be with me and he isnt 100% sure he doesnt.. then i called him again and he said i dont want you, i dont love you........ >>read additional details>>
2007-03-17 20:27:23 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
....i dont need your help, even though he was crying in the last phone call and in the txts before he said he dont wanna loose me forever and that he will always regret it and that i was his everything.
what am i supposed to do.. its been 3 weeks and i still cry each night, i said to him i want to be happy with him, i told him to not push love away that he doesnt have to go through pain he can have me but i cant be friends with him anymore it breaks my heart and i cant see this over guy coz its unfair on him..coz if u decide u want me i will have to drop him for you.. then he said he would do that for me.. drop all girls but yet... WHY the HELL was he so stubborn and saying at the end i DONT WANT YOU.. i said i hope one day you will realise youre making a mistake! ...
NOW please someone tell me what is he going through?? and WHY??
do guys sometimes need to be single for a while to see if anyone else will feel the same.
will he come back to me i want him so bad but not like this!
2007-03-17 20:36:59 · update #1
Doesnt seem like love to me. He sounds very immature, doesnt know himself or what he wants out of life, probably thinks that screwing around with other chicks will make him happier. Well, you sound like a very compassionate and loving person and u are right when you say that he will regret it, but he wont realize it now, he will only realize it later in life after he gets screwed over. What you need to do is stop calling him to hear his bipolar crap of I want you for my selfish reasons but I dont want you for my selfish reasons, and realize what YOU want and what is good and healthy for YOU. And my dear, he is definitely not healthy and not what you need or should be wasting emotions on. Now, I've been through relationship/break-up pain...the best way to get rid of it? ACCEPT the feelings, do not deny them...acceptance of sadness, loneliness, getting lied to or led on, etc etc. makes u heal and deal with the present/getting over the past MUCH quicker and easier than deluding yourself and lying to ureself that the pain is not there or that u didnt care about him and that ive moved on when u havent. However, talking to good friends who listen to u and care to help are the only people u should be talking to...by calling him u wont have enuf perspective and he will only be toying with u and bringing u back in whenever it is convenient for him. Do not allow it. Best of luck. Happiness is around the corner, trust me, you will come out stronger if you play the aftermath right.
2007-03-17 21:02:53 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems the man is going through a stage of withdrawal. Although this may seem somewhat blunt, in actuality, he may not want to go out with you. However, he is so adapted to having you around that his heart or mind denies his decision, thus creating a conflict between the heart and mind. It's like moving away from the norm; its uncomfortable and sometimes heartrendering. As for you, I could probably say the same. It's sad, but you two are probably going through very similar symptoms caused by traditionally the same problem. Both of you are so use to having each other that once you are separated, even though it was your decision, you are still aching because its just well... different! Relate to a person trying to quit smoking and you will hopefully understand. Advice: Just keep pushing. You will get through it; human nature tends to move on, by one mean or another. Some however go through extreme measures, and I pray to God you won't do anything like that. The withdrawal symptoms vary upon each person; some are clear of all thoughts by one week, others seem to be engulfed for nearly 6 months sometimes a year. But be strong and I'm sure everything will turn out to be for the better. Good Luck and Take Care!
2016-03-29 04:32:56 · answer #2 · answered by Donna 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing that i can tell you is to go ahead with your life and get over him. The reason that i say this is because even if you all were to get back together things would not be the same. You would always have in your mind that will he leave me again, and yes he would. I assume that you was good to him. He says that he ain't 100% sure what he wants to do. That should be sending off red flags in the back of your mind. He is only saying this because he wants to keep you on the rebound. He needs you there to be his back up plan. Just in case the person that he is seeing now leaves him then he will have you to fall back on. Trust me, you don't need to be with him. He will only bring you more heartbreak. Erase his number from your contact list (phone, e-mail, mind, etc...) do what ever to get rid of him. Bet he will call you within 2 weeks and try to make-up with the excuse that he was going through some things and he wants to make it better now.
2007-03-17 20:46:30 · answer #3 · answered by Makaveli daRule 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, he is leading you on and dangling your heart by a thread. I know that it's painful, but it will be more painful for you to be with someone who is doing this. If they leave once, then that is it, they are gone. You sound like a very compasionate, loving, woman, even though you love him, you need to love yourself first. If he wants to go run around, oh well, he lost someone great. He might even realize it later, but by then hopefully you will have your head on straight and realize it was a blessing in disguise.
I was with a guy for five years who hurt me, he tried to talk to and date the same girl atleast three times while we we're together and ended up saying he wanted to be with me when she turned him down, it was pathetic. I am now rid of him and found the love of my life and I have never been so happy as I am now, I am a different girl.
Do not let someone else be the source of YOUR happiness, you need to love yourself before you can or will love anyone else.
2007-03-17 20:35:27 · answer #4 · answered by Konjo Nashi Pirate™ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
this sounds very Familiar, why? because he sounds just like a guy I know......me. One girlfriend I had (after putting her through something like this) said to me after I tried to break up with her
"No" and walked out.
I was stumped!?!? what did she mean by "No"??
basically she said we aren't breaking up and went about her business as usual! We stayed together another 3 years after that, never had a problem since, until she went off to college and I joined the army, which made it our official break up.
Us guys don't know what we want, this guy you where dating is lost. He fits the profile dead on. Sooo I suggest you take a moment to compose yourself, find him and talk, and tell him its not over. He's pushing you away because he wants to know if you will be there or not. If you go, he will think he was right the whole time and never find a real relationship again.
funny concept, but its more common then you think!
2007-03-17 20:43:35 · answer #5 · answered by book 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know it is rough, but stay away. He is playing games and would be there for you if he was really 100% into you. I have been there and it SUCKS. You can't let your feelings get in the way of your common sense. I went through the same thing with two guys I was having feelings for, and decided to just have fun and let them be idiots. I decided to ignore them both, and then they BOTH came calling at the same time. One used money and promises and I completely ignored and shut him out forever. The other used flowers and words. I ended up marrying him. Play his game and ignore. If he comes back, he will be SURE of you. If he doesn't, you will find someone who IS sure.
2007-03-17 20:41:07 · answer #6 · answered by bubblingbroo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ur love is one sided. Ignore him rudely and observe. If he is not changing then he is not fit to be your love. Broken heart teaches a lot, learn it fast to grow.
Be sure the Almighty has kept much better love for you in store, believe it. I am telling from my own experience. As a human being you never forgive, I know. But this the way of life.
Let your kind heart burn, You will become purer, I say.
Oh my sister! have faith on your 56 yr. old brother ( or uncle whatever you like to address)
2007-03-17 20:42:28 · answer #7 · answered by subhas chandra kar 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hay buddy you asked if enyone could say how it feels it is like just emajin his penis entering someoneelses vagina and his lips over some other body even his hands toutching someoneelse it hits you like nothing in the world but everone has reasons but im sorry you are hurtting i can just think of his pain also and think of how he feels i have had someone hurt me like that 5 years ago and it still torments me every day i really think if you know is heart could mend and you will help his pain keep loving him he will come back or if he is verry hurt and someone who dosent heal then your best bet is to let him move on if you do love him you will make the decision hay this takes time he may forgive you but he will never forget it is like walking al over again you really need to be appoligetic sorry about my bad spelling but hay love hurts us all some time or another i feel for you just to loss the loved one of your dreams is a killer dont give up on him just give him time to heal and help him heal by telling him you are sorry there is nothing in this world to explain what has happend but you are trully sorry i hope things work out for you and im picking they will wipe them tears this is only the fist and not last hurrdle for you both to cross hope i have helped
2007-03-17 20:52:00 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've been dumped....we've all been there. Gather up your self respect and move on. I know haw bad it hurts, but dont add insult to injury by contacting him. It's kind of like being kicked in the *** and bending over in front of him....he'll do it again.....go home and lick your wounds and move on. Cry and call your friends.....decide that you are worth more than that and don't allow the people who say they care about you to hurt you like this.
2007-03-17 20:41:04 · answer #9 · answered by tlbrown42000 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i,m sorry you are in so much pain at less he,s being honest that he dosen,t love you. you need to move on find a man who respects you, and pays attention to you makes time for you and honesty tells you he loves only you. this is what love is respect honestly and trust he showed he can,t be trusted and he don,t respect you by going out with a norther woman. at less he,s honest.only time can heal your pain talk to a counselorthat will make some sence.xoxo
2007-03-17 20:37:21 · answer #10 · answered by i,m here if you need to talk. 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋