Little Jonny jokes???

Question

have any good ones???the one that makes me laugh the hardest gets the points......

Answer 1

Little Johnny and Susie are both five-year old friends and neighbors. Every afternoon after they get home from kindergarten, little Johnny and Susie play together. One afternoon, Susie says to little Johnny, " I heard a new word today during recess, and I don't know what it means, little Johnny. The word is
"p _nis". Little Johnny scratches his head, thinking for a moment and then replies, "Gee, Susie, that's a new word for me, too, but I'll ask my father what it means during dinner tonight and let you know when I see you tomorrow."
So that evening as little Johnny and his father are clearing the dinner dishes, little Johnny says to his father, "Daddy, my friend Susie heard a new word today during recess, and she and I both don't know what it means. I told Susie I would ask you tonight and let her know tomorrow. The word, Daddy, is p_nis."

"Well, little Johnny," his father says, "come on into my bedroom, and I'll not only tell you but also show you what that word means." So, little Johnny follows his father into his parents' bedroom, closes the door, and watches his father drop his undershorts. Little Johnny's father points to his own p_nis and proudly says, "This is what a p_nis is, little Johnny. In fact, this is actually a 'perfect p_nis'. Now go on to your room and finish your homework like a good son." Little Johnny thanks his father, finishes his homework, and goes to bed eager to tell Susie what he found out.

The next day, as soon as they get home, little Johnny asks Susie to meet him behind his garage, upon which little Johnny proceeds to drop his undershorts, points to his private part, and tells Susie, "See, Susie, this is what you would call a p_nis. In fact, if it was five inches SHORTER, it would be what you'd call a 'perfect p_nis' !!"

Answer 2

Sex ed teacher ask class , how many position are there in making love. Can anyone name a few? Little Jonny 69, teacher ignores him. Little girl says well teacher the only one I know is the missionary position. Again little Jonny says 70,70.

Answer 3

Little Johnny and his little brother johnny jr decide they are old enough to cuss like Dad. Mom calls them to breakfast and asks what they want to eat.
Little Johnny says "I would like some mot&^*r F***ing corn flakes. Mom loses it. Starts giving little Johnny the whipping of his life. Slap, Pop, pow...She leaves him crying on the floor and comes back to her youngest son who has been watching all this in fear.
"What do you want for breakfast?" she asks nicely
Little Johnny Jr says "Im not sure but I dont want no M**her F***K&&g cornflakes"

Answer 4

wanna know a dirty joke? Jonny played in the mud.
wanna know a clean joke? Jonny took a bath w/ bubbles.
wanna know a dirty joke? Bubbles is the girl next door.
(HAHA)

Answer 5

Little Johnny used to drink
but now he drinks no more
For what he thought was H2O
was H2SO4

Answer 6

little johnny doesn't know any cuss words, K? so one day, he hears his dad yelling at the tv "oh those darn B*stards and B*tches!" so little johnny askes "papa, what are B*astards and B*tches?" his daddy says "Oh those are just other names for ladies and gentlemen."
later that day, little Johnny goes outside, and he hears someone say put your P*nis in my V*gina" so he goes in and says "Mommy, what does P*nis and V*gina mean?" and his mommy says "oh those are just other words for hats and coats, dear."
So now johnny is in his house because they are getting ready for thanksgiving dinner. His daddy is upstairs shaving his face, and he cuts himself and yells "Sh*t!" and little Johnny asks "daddy, what does Sh*t mean?" his daddy says "oh that's the type of shaving cream im using."
His mommy is in the kitchen, cutting the turkey, and she cuts her finger and yells"F*ck!" little johnny says "mommy, what does F*ck mean?" his mommy says "oh, its just a way to cut a turkey."
so the door bell rings and johnny goes and answers it. he says "hello my B*tches and B*stards! take of your P*nises and V*ginas, my dad is wiping the Sh*t of his face, and my mom is F*cking the turkey"

Answer 7

One day little Johnny was playing with his toy train and it was going round and round when he stoped it he said, "all you sons of bxtches getting on get on, and all you sons of bxtches gettin off get off."
His mother comes in and says, "What did you say young man? Go to your room and think about what you said."
So after 4 hours his mother comes and says, "Come eat some supper and then you can play with your train again."
After supper little Johnny goes back to his train and says, "all you sons of bxtches getting on get on, and all you sons of bxtches gettin off get off, and all you sons of bxtches pxssed off about the delay, talk to the bxtch in the kitchen!"

Answer 8

lil johnny came home from school one day and saw his mom rubbing herself saying "i need a man, i need a man"" so lil johnny leaves her room and the next day he comes home from school and sees his mom rubbing herself saying again "i need a man i need a man" again johnny returns to his room...the next day lil johnny goes into his moms room and sees aman on top of her immeadiately lil johnny runs into his room and starts rubbing himself saying " i want a bike, i want a bike!"

Answer 9

lil jonny asked his teacher "do hearts have legs?" his teacher sayed "no, why?" lil jonny said "i heard my dad say, sweetheart, can you open your legs?"

Answer 10

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