A few weeks ago, for various reasons, I woman I know told me that she wasn't attracted to me, never thought about a relationship, didn't feel any chemistry (just a mental attraction), she doesn't treat me any differently than her guy friends, etc. This came as a major shock to me, as she sent off many, many signals that she wanted to more than just friends. This was not my imagination either - lots of people made comments to each of us saying "you make a nice couple," "looks like you have a hot and heavy relationship," etc.
She knew I was interested in her, and said she was sorry for not having told me sooner. She claims that doesn't understand how her behavior could have misconstrued - she is just a naturally friendly person.
Here is what I am trying to understand - can she be that oblivious to what she is doing, even after many, many people say otherwise?
2007-03-17 10:40:48 · 10 answers · asked by aggiesfan1982 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
This is very true. There was an article I read on MSN Dating. I wish I still had it for you.
10 men and 10 women, complete strangers were asked to converse with each other for a good amount of time (30min. or so).
Afterwards, the researchers asked the men if they thought the woman was attracted to them. They also asked the women if they were attracted to them.
Not surprisingly, the men who thought their partner was attracted to them wasn't. Men could of sworn the woman was giving off all the right signals and clues.
The men who thought their partner had no interest in them actually HAD interest.
The women were giving off all the signals of attraction when they really weren't attracted (ex: flipping hair, physical contact, batting the eyelashes) And all the signals of "I'm not interested" (ex: crossing the arms, looking away) when they really WERE attracted
In conclusion, women's hints and signals are very ambigious. The woman doesn't even know what she's doing...so it's very hard for us men to figure it out as well.
2007-03-17 10:49:26 · answer #1 · answered by the_omz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm kind of in the same situation right now. My boss told me a while back that she thought I was hot, she's a cute girl but I'm not interested. Sometimes you just get caught up in the moment and before you know it you're flirting with that person for months, some people at work even thought we were together. After a while you come to your senses and realize you could be hurting someone, and stop. I feel bad about it now and make sure to keep it more on the friendly side and not flirt. I think this girl you're talking about knew what she was doing. To test her interest maybe start talking to another girl and see if she gets jealous. If she does she's probably interested.
2007-03-17 11:00:43 · answer #2 · answered by #1bob 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
exactly what are the signals? how hot and heavy were you?
are you in an actual relationship? people say what they want to say from external appearances. hey, if the girl liked getting attention from you and you had no problem giving it...what would make her say she's not attracted to you? you must have made an advancement at her. if a girl says she thinks youre cute...do u think that is flirting? if you do...that must be your problem, your upbringing or whatever. it may be her open observation. nothing more. that painting is lovely you painted. does that mean she is flirting? giving off some signal? seems you dont have much experience with women to make the statement or question youve made. peace
2007-03-17 10:49:12 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Humans in general are flirts! Now depending on the age of this woman she may or may not have known what she was doing. I am a natural flirt, BUT I do know when my flirting is working on a friend. So normally I stop! I am sure she probably sensed what she was doing, but the idea of a man taking interest in her migt have stroked her ego! Just give her a break for now. Avoid her for a while and she will flock to you!
2007-03-17 10:46:14 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well...now that you know shes attracted to you ...instead of trying to figure out why you couldnt understand her "signals" -why dont you figure out if you want to take her out and give her a chance
especially if alot of people thought you looked good together
good luck
2007-03-17 10:49:11 · answer #5 · answered by bulldog lover 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
some do but then again some of them don't. It's sometimes that some people just don't pay attention to the vibes they're giving. Just talk to her and ask exactly what she ment so there's no mis-communication.
Good luck
2007-03-17 10:49:25 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
people's opinions (except mine j/k) don't matter, but yours does. don't get caught in that emotional tug o war with an indecisive woman. just find someone else. don't try to press her about getting into a relationship at all.
2007-03-17 10:47:55 · answer #7 · answered by Guy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Uhhh.... I don't know, but I know a webstie that lists them sings. Go to http://www.lovingyou.com/ then under dating and in square "getting a date". Then they give some lists of them signs for them to understand. I hope it helps.
2007-03-17 10:47:35 · answer #8 · answered by Robby M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
some do and some don't if someone is giving you a signal ask them but i would think you would know if it was the right signal not
2007-03-17 10:44:19 · answer #9 · answered by kitty 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is the old "come on, come on".
Followed by get "away, get away".
Bill Cosby has a great routine on this.
2007-03-17 10:49:06 · answer #10 · answered by bigjohn B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋