I'd like to do something nice for her, since I've been an everyday witness to her mother's declining health and know how hard it has been on her personally and at work. She's a wonderful boss and was a wonderful daughter to her mother and I would like to either do something or get her something to express how sorry I am and how great she has been through all of this. Any thoughts?
2007-03-17 08:04:44 · 11 answers · asked by gaiamoon98 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
What you wrote here was so clear, sincere and touching my first suggestion is to either get a nice card and include a similar message or write a note. I can tell you that saying that to her will probably mean more than anything else you can do. Let her hear these things...it will be one of the greatest gifts you can give her.
Now beyond that if you want to do something else, think of what she likes and what your relationship is like with the boss. If you generally get together, then I'd suggest lunch, dinner or a get together to give this and talk.
If not then any gesture that you think is "her" would be my thought. Maybe leave the note with a plant, a bouquet of flowers, or even a single flower. Or just go shopping and see if anything jumps out. I just saw some lovely picture frames the other day that said "Love." One of those for a pic of her Mom might be lovely if she has pictures out. Think of what she likes, and include something like that if you want to go an extra step.
Also I found a lovely book filled with quotes and essays on losing a Mom a few years back, and when a few friends lost their Mom, I sent that book with a note. But I knew that was something that would touch my friends. But something like that is an idea. Also there is a crafter who does lovely calligraphy photo holders with various appropriate sayings. I got one for me I loved it so much, and one for another friend. That isn't right for all (one friend admitted she would cry every time she saw it...I wasn't sure so I asked her if it would help or hurt). But that was a dear friend so not sure if you want to go there with a Boss...don't know your relationship.
I still think the absolute best thing you can do is to write all you said here, and end it by saying if she ever needs to talk you would always be glad to listen. I am sure she will treasure this the most. And anything you add to it will only be the bow on it.
You Boss sounds lucky to have you! I'm sure you will do great! AND ETA to add please don't worry about rights and wrongs. As long as you speak from your heart you will be fine. And remember if anyone lashes out it is usually their stuff, not anything you said or did (not that I would expect that here at all).
2007-03-17 08:24:18 · answer #1 · answered by FineWhine 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, I know that a lot of kids in my neighborhood lost parents to suicide or car wrecks. These were people that I had known since I was a little girl. When my best friends lost their mom, I went around with someone else and helped collect money to buy her a grave blanket because they couldn't afford one. I also went to the wake and the funeral and sat and comforted them and let them get out their emotions. Sometimes there is really nothing you can say but more so stuff you can do. Maybe you can go and make sure if there is stuff that they need to get done, let them know you are there to help. Here is a poem you and them. The deepest sympathy I offer to you, For the loss that you feel and the pain you've gone through. Just know that your loss is heavens gain, and each passing day will subside your pain. For everyones made with a plan of their own, and when that plan ends its time to go home. Just know where they are lies a place for you too, and they will meet you at heavens gates when its time to go through. I hope it helps, goodluck and I am sorry about your loss.
2016-03-29 02:49:38 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Spend a little money on a really pretty blank card and then hand write your condolences. DON'T say you know how she feels because no one can know what that feels like unless they have lost a parent. Just be supportive in your words and when she returns to work, invite her to lunch. I wouldn't bring up her loss unless she says something about it first.
When my dad died my best friend got me this really pretty card and a CD that had my dad's song he dedicated to me when I left home for the first time. She remembered the story I had told her and made a gift from the heart. Now when ever I hear that song not only do I think of my Dad I also think of her.
Blessed be
2007-03-17 08:19:56 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Might I suggest being there for her when she needs a shoulder to cry on. Also be prepared for her mood swings as the reality of her loss is felt. After the flowers, cards and fruit baskets are gone, the people leave, the quiet time starts, that is when the loss is really felt, especially when there is an anniversary, birthday or holiday. Be there for her.
2007-03-17 08:17:52 · answer #4 · answered by whitehairblueeyes 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure what your price range is...but, a nice card with a handwritten message is good, add some flowers, add a massage at a local spa, add a nice lunch or dinner...these should give you some ideas and the price range is from low to high.
2007-03-17 08:16:56 · answer #5 · answered by minimickimichelle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was close with a co-worker and his wife. When she lost a baby due to miscarriage, a couple of us got together and sent her a pampering/stress reliever basket.
Start here: http://www.adorablegiftbaskets.com/sympathy-gift-ideas.html
or just type in Stress or Grief gift baskets into google.com
Also, just letting her know that you are there is a major help.
You are a kind person...I wish there were more of you in the world.
2007-03-17 08:42:30 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
be there for her 3-6 months down the line then she will need a shoulder to lean ON a nice sympathy card and flours will say a lot more than words
2007-03-17 11:30:13 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
a really nice card sent to her home ...attend the visitation or service...later...treat her to lunch like if you leave to get take out then get her some too and pay for both ...after a parent's death sometimes it is too much effort to make a lunch or go get something...ordinary tasks are just sometimes too hard.
2007-03-17 09:45:17 · answer #8 · answered by Library Eyes 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Take her to a nice lunch when she gets back to work or send her a fruit basket
2007-03-17 08:08:35 · answer #9 · answered by lorraine 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey hum in those cases probably the best thing to do is listen to the person whom just lost a familiar. trying to take them away of their daily routine helps a bit.
2007-03-17 08:33:21 · answer #10 · answered by mexicamacho 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋