My nephew conceived a son during casual sex. The baby is now over a year old and all is not well in the parent's relationship. They are living together but as everyone knows, casual sex is a poor way to choose a life partner. The mother has threatened that if my nephew doesn't do what she wants him to on a daily basis, she will take the baby back to her home state (several hundred miles away) and her very dysfunctional family. What legal options does he have? He now lives near his extended family, all of whom are very supportive and involved with the baby. His name is on the birth certificate and he was present at the delivery. He ADORES his son and is distraught at the idea of losing him. Dad is amazingly tender and loving with his son and he is terrified that she will take off out of state with the baby. What legal options does he have? How likely would it be for him to get custody and how would he go about it?
2007-03-17 06:33:57 · 13 answers · asked by emily 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
He needs to consult with an attorney immediately. He needs to know what his rights are within the state he is living. He also needs to know how to protect his rights and the child -- should the mother attempt to leave the state on a whim.
If I were advising him, I would tell him not to hesitate -- go see someone now!
2007-03-17 06:39:37 · answer #1 · answered by Ifeelyourpain 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What state does your nephew live in? I live in Georgia, and the law states that I have sole physical and legal custody. My daughter's father was on the birth certificate also, but as of right now, he has no rights to her at all. I allow him to see her only when I am there (there was abuse involved), but other than that he is not allowed to take her out by himself. Now, mostly only the southern states have laws like this, so my advice would be to contact an attorney, or simply look up the laws online. All I had to do was print the law out, I didn't have to go to court or anything. Good luck to your nephew, and hopefully the mother will do what is right for her child, which in this case is maybe joint custody, or at least visitation over the summer or something.
2007-03-18 00:09:56 · answer #2 · answered by busy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
File for legal custody now. Do NOT let her take the baby out of state without some kind of legal agreement. It will be much more difficult if she has the child with her after they separate. For both of their protection they should have joint custody papers filed before they ever separate that way if they do there are already precedents set. If she leaves with baby then he will have to fight for visitation etc. and will be responsible for child support whether he is able to see the child or not. If his name is on the birth certificate he is the legal father, but unfortunately our courts still tend to give custody to mothers. If there is love between these to people they should do a joint custody arrangement before the issue comes up and becomes an ugly court battle.
2007-03-22 12:56:09 · answer #3 · answered by Laura Marie B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She has no right to take the baby out of state without your nephew's permission. The only way he can get TRY to get custody would be to file for custody but the court will rule what is best for the baby and usually that ruling is on the side of the mother in the case of a baby. Unless he has some irrefutable proof of her being totally unfit to be this child's mother he probably doesn't have much of a chance. Her being a spoiled brat and trying to call all the shots doesn't make her an unfit mother.
2007-03-17 15:19:31 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since they were not married, in order for him to establish any legal rights to the child, he needs to file a Petition for Paternity. Once a Court adjudicates him as the legal father he will automatically get at least visitation. Of course, he will then also be obligated to pay child support based on his income.
If they are living together his chances are getting legal custody are slim. They are actually pretty slim anyway. Since they were not married he will have to show that it is in the child's best interest that he have custody (just like he'd have to do if they were married and were now getting divorced). Unfortunately, in most states, though it's not always the law, he will may have to show the Court that she is an 'unfit' parent.
The plus side is that when he does establish paternity and gets visitation, he could very likely get an order from the Court that would prevent the mom from removing the child from the state without his permission or the Court's permission. he needs to to hire an attorney. In my state, it would cost him about $1,000 to $1,500 to get everything done for him--visitation wise. Go for custody will obviously cost more.
2007-03-17 13:43:53 · answer #5 · answered by kathylouisehall 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If he signed the birth certificate as the father. and no custody has been odored, he has as much right to the child as she does.
In most States if you have the child in your custody meaning with you for 48 hours you can go and petition for temporary custody of the child she wouldn't be able to touch the child until there was a court hearing. deciding custody.
Then he could tell the judge of her threats and most likely would be granted custody due to the fact that she is already using the child as a threat.
Courts really frown on this.
Good luck!!!!!!!!
2007-03-24 03:58:03 · answer #6 · answered by angie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get legal help fast!! When I was going through this situation it was a scary time. Sounds to me like the only good part of the childs life is with the father. Start writing everything down. Get a calander or planner a write down everything from the threats to grandma buying socks. It will help a lot to solidify who takes better care of the child. I do not know where you live but in Wisconsin the father still has rights and the mother has to prove he is indangering the child before she can even move out of the county. Good luck! It will be tough but the family support system sounds strong.
2007-03-22 16:01:31 · answer #7 · answered by Wistall 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
unfortunately as they were never married.......the mother CAN take the child anywhere she wants anytime she wants without getting the fathers permission. When he signed the birth certificate he agreed to her having physical custody.....he should have read the paper closer...its right there....she does not even legally have to let him have visitation. Unfortunately i know this as i am now going thru this with my son...and having spoken to an attorney several times......the first thing you will need to get is an acknowledgement of paternity...of which you also signed with the birth certificate...which will eliminate the need for a dna test..so that will save some money.....he can also go to the domestic relations court with this paper and file for emergency custody.......which will stop her from taking the child anywhere. It will be a messy process but one that is VERY necessary if he truly wants his child. He may wish to waive any child support on her part as part of the agreement of custody ...that may "help" her to make the decision to just let him have the child. She should also me made aware that by her signing over custody DOES NOT take away her parental rights....just custody.
If you have any other questions...as i said am going thru this now ....please feel free to email me or message me and i will pass on the information i get from the attorney...who by the way is giving us this advise free over the phone....see if you can find one in your area that may be willing to do that.
Karen
2007-03-17 23:18:52 · answer #8 · answered by sarjd22000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get an attorney and file for legal custody. He needs to have legal sole custody. He should get her threats on tape, or in writing so he can present them at court. Or have witnesses to hear what she's told him. If he has a steady job, and proof he can care for the child and wants the child, his chances are good. He has the support system it sounds like. Judges don't like it when mom's start threatening to take the kids away for no good reason. Mom to 3.
2007-03-17 16:14:02 · answer #9 · answered by Melanie A 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a touchy subject specially on the fathers prospects. The courts mostly side with the mother because of birthing and simply the femme meanuver is used in many cases when it comes to children. I have seen it happen so often in the courts that the child is kept with the mother. Being an on looker it seems like the wrong choice but you got to bring in alot of evidence to prove he would be a better candidate to have custody of said child. There is a 35 to 40% chance with just him going in there and being able to get the child balanced on his background, job status. Maybe getting him in parenting classes. Witnesses are good but when it comes down to it your going to need something hard to win that case.
2007-03-17 13:41:03 · answer #10 · answered by DistantDoll 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to a lawyer that specializes in child custody/support issues. He should not tell her that he is trying to get sole custody. Even if he doesn't she can't move more than 3 hours away without a judge's permission or she would be breaking the law. Good Luck
2007-03-22 16:22:50 · answer #11 · answered by Pinkee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋