Why do my children run around, scream and show off when friends,relatives or any visitor come to the house?

Question

It doesnt matter whether my parents come to visit or a friend or complete stranger, they start running about and shouting a each other. They jump over the furniture and I can do nothing to stop them. I am a childminder and have no problems with the minded children or my own when we are at home on our own. My children are 3 1/2. I have 2 other chidren in school who would never have behaved like this--where have I gone wrong and how can I fix it? I really feel like giving up childminding as I think my own boys resent it but I have done it for 9 years without any problems. If I do give up then I will need to go to work and my children would hate to have to go to a childminder. At the moment I am very unhappy about the situation.

Answer 1

children like to show off which is what they are doing when you have visitors. they thrive on the attention that it gets them. nesxt time it happens, tell them to stop and that its wrong and then ignore them. keep strong as they will continue to try to get your attention, (this attention is verbal and non-verbal like eye cotnact and so on). obviosuly if they are putting themselves or anyone else at physical risk you will need to intervene. When they realise that they are not getting the attention they crave they will stop and eventually after many times of this happening they will get the picture and stop behaving like this. it also sounds like they would benefit from a stricter disciple routine. explain to them what will happen if they acta certain way like they will lose their favourite toy for the rest of the week and stick to it no matter how much they plead or are good the rest of the week. if they are acting up when the minded children are there they are obviosuly threatned by them and feel like their mum is being taken away. explain to them that you are not being taken away and make time to play games together with the minded children and your own and also for quality time together with your own children when the minded children are gone. is it the case that games are only played when the minded children are there? think of different things like that. hope this helps

Answer 2

It's probably just because they are younger, the younger kids usually have more energy and spunk than the older more responsible kids. My mom had 6 kids and the older 4 of us never acted like that, (except maybe dressing up and dancing around the living room). But my little sisters go CRAZY! Like you said, they jump all over the furniture, get the dog going nuts with them. And I think it's just because the youngest ones are used to all the attention and when you have someone over giving them your attention, then they try to get it back on them. And it works.

Answer 3

I have been on both ends of this as a Dad and Grandfather so I can tell you that it is just a form of getting attention....good or bad. You can't be afraid to discipline your children in front of visitors because they will take advantage of it. Kids aren't stupid. If you let them get away with it, it will continue. Start making them sit on the couch or go to their rooms until they can behave. You have to take the upper hand in this situation or they will. Your choice.

Answer 4

I have a 3 yr old who INSISTS on crying for everything she wants. It is nothing more than a display for attention. I've learned that if i don't pay her any attention, she will LITERALLY yell for hours. I nipped this in the bud with stern and sharp discipline WITHOUT physical punishment. You have to let your children know that certain actions have negative consequences. She now ends up in her bed whenever she screams, and i found out its either one of two reasons; 1) She wants attention or, 2) She's sleepy. So whenever she goes to her room, she either falls right to sleep, or preoccupies herself because she knows she WILL NOT get a positive response from crying. Later on I come in the room and ask her what she wanted when shes settled and if she not sleeping of course and explain to her that her action was not the proper way to behave. You have to make the problem theirs instead of yours. This is their first step towards learning responsibility AND consequence. The 3rd step to that when they are older will be reconciliation, but that's for a later time. Let them take responsibility by letting them know what they are doing is wrong, then give them the consequence for doing the wrong thing. Later on, teach them to "make up" to you by doing light chores or simply saying, "I'm sorry". It worked wonders for all 3 of my girls, and now its a lifelong principal they live by.
Responsibility, Consequence, Reconciliation. Good luck!!

Answer 5

It's an attention getter. I am in a similar situation. I have two older kids, Jr. high and elementary. My other two are 4 and 14 months. They are destructive. I always say, be patient. Train up a child , so when they get old they will not depart from it. They may not turn around tomorrow, next week or even next year... but eventually they will get it.

Answer 6

Depending on the age its normal. They do it for attention like "look at what I can do". If they are older children they need to be taught manners. I have a 6yr old step daughter who no matter who comes to the house, who is talking, if we are at a DR visit for my daughter, or if my daughter is in the hospital and we go to visit her she has to be center of attention. In her case she needs manners but tell that to her mom or even my husband who just ignores it.

Answer 7

You haven't given them any house training when it comes to having guess in the house that why! There are rules when you have company over and just because you have company doesn't mean you act a fool in front of them. That embarrassing to you and it says you cant control your kids and if you cant control your kids then you cant control your life.

Answer 8

i used to have this problem with my eldest, but not when people were round, only when i was on the phone and i couldnt tell him off easily, it was attention seeking, and to be deliberately annoying. after i was free to discipline him, i told him next time he acts like a two year old he'd get treated like one, sent to his room and no pocket money. you need to tell your children firmly before it hapoens again exactly what will happen if this happens again, be consistent and dont back down.

Answer 9

Simple, they want your attention and know you get stressed, try and warn them people are coming over and tell them they will have to go to their bedrooms if they cannot behave. Explain how you would like them to be with you and meet people but only if they can be civil

Answer 10

I have not have been given any siblings and that i do no longer stay with or perhaps communicate over with my mom! I do have small young ones of my very own and confident, tell them off (I did it this nighttime whilst they have been working around)