Should I drop my girlfriend?

Question

I started going out with her almost by accident. We're lab partners in a biology class that I can't afford to drop, and she first called me "baby" about three weeks after she met me. Valentine's was our first official date, and it's been a little over a month since. She couldn't be bothered to kiss me on our one month anniversary, or to call me when she said she would. I'm also beginning to have doubts about some things she says about her career and her outside life.

On the one hand, I'm 20 and don't want to lose her, as she is my first GF. On the the other hand, she's cold enough and distant enough that I'm having doubts. Any insights?

UPDATE: Thank you all for your replies. The problem at hand is this: If I dump her, it could have a deleterious effect on my academics. If I keep her, it could have a deleterious effect on my mental health. Is there any way to harmonize the two?

Answer 1

She sounds like a sketchy kind of person, you're only 20 and this is your first girlfriend so maybe it's time you found a new one. One who keeps her word.
There's so many lovely girls out there.

Answer 2

You're really asking whether you ought to settle for someone who doesn't really care for you, because you're inexperienced (and wondering whether you could ever find someone better?).

Let the girl answer your question for you. If she doesn't behave like a real girlfriend should, and you try to imagine her as your wife and having a family with her and you get the strong urge to stop imagining that, then yes.... tell her you just want to be friends and that you don't feel romantic about her.

No reason to be thinking of dropping a class just because you're not interested in this girl, by the way. If she's a reasonably mature person then you can both handle working together a little longer without major problems. There is a lesson in all this, by the way: don't ever start a relationship with your co-workers!

Answer 3

I think the easiest thing you can do is talk to her about it, voice your concerns and how they make you feel (about being cold, distant, and unreliable about phone calls etc.) if she really does want to get to know you, she may be more considerate about your feelings. If she doesn't seem to care at all or express any genuine concern, then I would just tell her that it isn't working out.

Just because she is your first girlfriend, doesn't mean she will be your last.

Answer 4

Sounds like shes got secrets. Maybe she doesnt wanna open to you yet or doesnt trust you enough....
This could be her first relationship as well so she doesnt know how to act.

If you want this to work out I think you should give her some time. Maybe another week or two, see if anything changes.....

But if you feel things arent gonna work out then just break it off and move on.

:)

Answer 5

lissen up i can totally understand that you would have doubts about it. i say you talk to her be open tell er how you feel i mean exactly what you have said here use your emotions what she is doing and has done is wrong so if it doesn't change move on you will be doing the right thing. good luck:)

Answer 6

Chill dear, she must be into a serious relation with u. to measure these feelings never estimate by length but instead measure by depth. have eye contact with her and trust her

Answer 7

Talk to her about this. If you're not meant to be, she'll probably leave you realizing what she's making you feel, if it's not the same for her

Answer 8

First girlfriend?
You've got alot to learn

Answer 9

sounds like an easy lay

Answer 10

be considerate with your feelings both and be open to her of what you feel bcoz being honest is not bad.