2007-03-13 05:20:16 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Diseases & Conditions ➔ Respiratory Diseases
You have 2 options: 1) Leave the relationship, 2) Accept that this person is going to smoke pot and all of the ramifications that will come with it, along with the knowledge deep down inside of you that he/she will ultimately choose drugs over you.
No one can make another person quit. You must accept this. The decision to do so and the motivation must come from within the individual. You may find help from a 12 step group such as Al-Anon.
I have been in the exact same situation as you. We made deals (only 1x/week, lol), I justified it (so what? it helps him relax and he loves me?), I joined in (if you can't beat 'em, join 'em, thinking it might make us closer, lol). We got engaged and three years later I found myself searching his hiding spots around the apartment and flushing meth down the toilet 10 days before the wedding. Thank god I woke up and called it off. I only saw him once again, 8 years ago. I'm now happily married with a child, and after the break-up I went to graduate school to become a therapist. One of my areas of expertise is addictions.
Save yourself, honey. You alone cannot save him or her.
2007-03-13 05:40:28 · answer #1 · answered by monkey mom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, you are invested in this relationship but I am not. Here is what I would do using my knowledge in addictions and mental health. Leave. Leave fast. As the book says "he's not that into you' don't let him take you down too, never date someone sicker than you are. Get thee to a group for families of addicted people.
2007-03-13 12:26:26 · answer #2 · answered by dtwladyhawk 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dump the person, In the long run it's not worth it
Most druggies have to be totally down and out before the realize it's them that has to change
2007-03-13 19:04:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He/she has made his choice--he prefers the addicition to the relationship. The best course of action is to accept the truth and leave this person before he/she destroys his/her partner's life.
2007-03-13 12:25:37 · answer #4 · answered by surlygurl 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You should use 'tough love'. Sometimes when facing a situation like this it is better to leave, let them see their mistake and stop on their own.
2007-03-13 12:32:08 · answer #5 · answered by Rhonda B 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Say it with me, "You cannot change anyone. You can only change yourself."
Good.
Now the thing is you accept the person as is, or move on.
Simple, huh?
2007-03-13 12:28:23 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
you can't make him pick one addiction over another...
2007-03-13 14:33:46 · answer #7 · answered by al e. c 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋