Should I tell my ex girlfriend, who has a history of depression, that I am committed to her?

Question

My relationship with my girlfriend of 9 mths was ended by her 1 mth ago on the basis that "her feelings had changed". I suspected she was depressed (she has a history of depression), she admitted she was & went to her dr who presctibed prozac & counselling. 1 wk later she said she wasn't depressed, didn't need counselling and our relationship was causing her unhapiness. She ended things.

I decided not to contact her to give her space. Everytime I said I was worried and thought she was depressed, she said she wasn't. I thought the space would allow her to focus on herself without the complication of our relationship.

She got back in touch with me a wk ago over some money she owed me. I was unsure as to her intentions.

I recenty met up with her. Whilst the meeting was awkward at first, she then was very natural and happy with me. She seemed sad when we parted & there is clearly still feelings for both of us.

What to do now? I will see her next wk again & want to be with her?

Answer 1

if you really care about this person then take things slowly and let things take there time.go out and have fun together remember not to make the first move.good luck and hope you enjoy yourself

Answer 2

The best way to get back your ex is https://tr.im/ZRaF1

Here's the hard part: Pretend she never existed, like it was all a dream, don't call her, that will make you the smaller person, be the bigger person since you deserve better, what she did to you on Valentines Day was immature, especially after dating for four years. This person wasted allot of your time and through it out the window. Go out tonight, even it it is only yourself, don't drink and call or feel sorry for yourself, this will only cause you embarrassment! I know your hurting..This will eventually will go away in time. Today is not a good day for you and your emotions are spinning all over the place.

Please, whatever you do, don't answer her calls and don't call her. If she keeps calling, which she pro bally won't, don't return her call for 5 days. Make her sweat and DO Not get back together right away if you discuss this in 5 days. Tell her since she Broke up with you, you have done allot of thinking, and had the taste of "being single again" and you would like more time being "friends" for now, so you are sure you are making the right decision. Remember "She decided she didn't want to be with you" so the door is open for you to get out and see what you have been missing for four years. You honestly need to do this for yourself.

She doesn't know, but what she did was give you the best valentines day present you will ever get! A new start and a new beginning, use it to your advantage. You will look back on this and Thank God this happened now instead of 4 more wasted years of YOUR life. Today does suck, stay Strong and I promise you your life is going to be so much more exciting and you are going to be happy. If you continue to call and call her, she will think of you as needy and won't want you. She is going to rethink what she did to you today and will be hurt, if you act like you could care less. Girls always want the ones they can't have. That is who you are now to her. Let her suffer,realizing what a mistake she made. This will drive her crazy. Right now she is on cloud 9 thinking you will take her back, OH, is she stupid!

Your life isn't ruined, hers is..She lost someone special, and gave you a gift to let to live life and find someone you deserve. You are not getting back at her, your teaching her what an idiot she is and what she lost and what you gained without her. SO when You eventually talk to her, tell her thank you for what she did...
She will be hurt and you will be happy!

Answer 3

"1 wk later she said she wasn't depressed, didn't need counselling and our relationship was causing her unhapiness."
Sounds to me like she was looking for an "out" and found it, She may be the type of person that doesnt want a long term relationship or she feels that the relationship you two shared was "toxic" in her eyes. You cannot change the way others feel, only stand back and respect there decision. If it was ment to be it will be.

Answer 4

If I were you, I'd let her come to you. I don't mean make her come running or play hard to get - I mean be there for her and let her see you you care. Then, when she feels better, she might see that you are a good guy and wants to be with you. Every relationship is different but there does seem to be feelings on both sides. However if she is depressed, the last thing she needs is pressure - it could make her withdraw further from you. I think you should carry on playing it cool, but showing you care. I admire you for the way your dealing with this. Just be patient. Good luck. x

Answer 5

Just play it by ear! obviously this girl is happier being single, no offence to you. some people are just better at being friends than in a relationship. I wouldn't go rushing into telling her that you want to get back with her. If she needed space to get her head together, you're better off waiting until she's ready to get back with you. Diving straight back in again will only bring you back to where you were when you split up. if you're meant to be together then it'll happen. Don't forcre the issue. Show your committment to her by supporting her as a friend.

Answer 6

Want to know how to get your ex back? Change yourself. Don't worry about changing other people, worry about changing yourself. Go to https://tr.im/eFVPG

Once you do that then you can start to worry about getting back together with your ex, other wise you will find that you are fighting about all the same things and getting no where. Do what it takes and I promise things will work out in your favor.

The funny thing is I came to the realization that I had to change a little too late. After I was kicked out and after I was about to lose the only things that truly mattered to me - her love. A funny thing happens when we truly love someone and lose them. We do what ever it takes to get them back. For me I had to drop bad habits that had caused not only our relationship to sour but practically every other relationship I had had in the past. Not only with women, but with friends, co-workers, family, you name it.

Which is why I say to you as my ex at the time said to me, the only thing you can do is change yourself. Work on yourself and improve on the person that you already are. Drop the negative things in your life that don't belong there and you will see all of your relationships start to take off to new heights.

Answer 7

Dont tell her to her face, she may find this too much, what I would do is send her a text or letter telling her how you feel, but that if she does`nt want to she need not mention this text/letter next time you meet. This will tell her loud and clear how you feel but allow her to think about it and act on it if she wants to. Im worried that if you tell her this face to face she may panic and give you the wrong reaction as she is "on the spot"

Answer 8

Hiya,its obvious that you care for this person very much,but i believe that she is looking for a get out clause.
Also please bear in mind that just because somebody is depressd dosent meen they are incapable of making a correct decision.
You seem to be saying that she only ended the relationship because she was depressed,this makes you sound slightly arragont,,,,,,,take it on the chin and move on,,,sorry its not what you wanted to hear,

Answer 9

let her do the running it sounds like she is depressed but is in denial of the fact for what ever reason so people think depression is something that you keep to yourself
that would explain her on /off feelings towards you as she will have days when shes fine then days when she just wants to be alone

Answer 10

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