I am so shy. HELP?

Question

i dont know what to do & I really need some help!
I am extremely shy and i always regret not doing the things i want to. At highschool, i sit in the classroom at recess and lunch by myself and do my homework, whilst everyone else is outside socialising. It gets me really mad because i know i can be a fun person to be around but i am too shy to meet or actually talk to people.

All my "friends" ditched me when we went into highschool school, i think it was because im just too boring and shy.

I know i am wasting my life when i could be doing the things i want to, but my shyness is stopping me.

Please HELP?

Answer 1

Sometimes a little bit of liquid courage goes a long way. Not to much though, because u will wake up between 2 fat, bald guys.

Answer 2

Well I can't just all of a sudden say your shyness disappear and it 'll disappear lol, trust me when I was at shcool I was very shy too, and think I should have been braver, well that was not my best time in life, and after I left I have had, such a good life, and naturally became a confident person, that I don't even remember that I was a person who can't even go to shops alone lol.

Its with age, responsiblity , your shyness will go it selft please don;t be hard on your self , you have a long life ahead of you, your, not missing out on anything, one thing though , I could say is , its worth doing hard work now in your studying than later in life , you won't regret it , you have a life ahead of you many more things , I'm so certain you won't be a shy person forever, just concentrate on your education , play a bit of sport ,that is your age , and good luck , I'm sure your'll do very well, you are the people that acutally appear to seem , that much wouldn't happen in life , but it will , and you'll see it .

Answer 3

Sounds like you need a confidence boost, go out and get yourself a make over, new hair, new clothes, new look. Joining a gym is greta beacuse you can meet new people but also makes you feel great! Maybe try a hobby or a class so you go for yourself and your own interest but might end up meeting some friedns there.

Also hyphnotherpay is very effective give that a go!

Good Luck

Answer 4

I used to be shy too so I know how it feels. If you take one little step each day to get better then your confidence will gradually increase. Just start by doing one thing you wouldn't normally do each day. Try to push yourself. Even though it might seem hard at first, it will get easier. Some of my friends ditched me too as they thought I was boring, but who needs friends like that anyway? In time you will make new friends. Good luck!

Answer 5

I was the same, a book helped me 'Hypnothink' by romnic, sounds a bit out there but it was brilliant.

One of the lessons were to relax in a place where you feel most relaxed (bed/fave chair). imagine yourself relaxing on a deserted beach with the sun beating down.

When you feel relaxed enough, imagine yourself in a situation that you would feel shy, but your not, your confidant. any negative thoughts go back to the beach and re-calm yourself.

In real life, when situations occur where you would normally feel shy, you will feel more relaxed. and the more you practise, the less shy you'll get.

It works, sadly I think the Romnic book is out of print, but there is a Hypnothink book by a different author out, see link, and good luck.

Answer 6

I really empathise with your situation,
you have received some good advise in your answers, you have to be the one to make the steps to becoming more assertive,try joining social clubs that offer things that you enjoy doing.a thing that helped me was the DUKE OF EDINBURGH AWARD SCHEME.This will help you to see what you can achieve when you are involved in a wide range of situations, give it a try you will probably surprise yourself at how you cope and adapt to different situations. your confidence will literally shine through,i cannot praise the scheme highly enough, check out where you can take part in the program.you will not regret it .the only thing holding you back is you.

Answer 7

takes a lot but try out a totally different group to socialise with. for example, join a new football, rugby etc club. if sports is not your thing, somethin else, book clubs?? easiest to get to know people when you have a common interest, not so much when you were younger cause your age was your common ground. find something YOU like doing and see if their is anyone else locally that enjoys the same stuff. See my point?

Answer 8

Try this, walk into a room, look the room in the face, say to yourself I'm as good as any person here. Another thing you could do is visualise yourself in a situation you have described, having conversations with people. This will help you to move forward. You have the intelligence and character to ask advice, you don't have to take it, if you don't want to. Good luck.

Answer 9

Professional counseling might help, and I am sure that there must be groups that meet to over-come shyness. I would judge that the fear of not being accepted is at the forefront -- The fear of what others will say. Truly there is nothing to fear except fear itself. Being with other people is not the problem. Fear is. Fear is totally unreasonable and completely false, and a poor predictor of the future.

Answer 10

Join some clubs, participate in class activities, SIT UP; dont do your homework at lunch, that just puts out the message to everyone else "leave me alone, i'm busy." go find a table at lunch thats only got 1 or 2 people sitting at it looking as lost as you are and say, "hey, i'm _____, is it cool if i sit here."