compatibility and relationship?

Question

I have been with my partner for nearly 2 years. When we are together physically, its great. When we call and email, I feel like affection and genuinity is absent at times. Our conversational topics tend to be repetitive and mundane which makes me question our compatibility. I act distant and become silent when I am upset because I feel like he does not pay enough attention to me. I know he loves me but at times I casually question that he takes me for granted. Efforts on his part, financially or mentally (e.g. thinking of fun things to do together)and his time given to me, is little in my opinion. I know he works hard but I constantly feel that he is not making me his first priority in life which he vowed he would. He is constantly tired which is now affecting our free time. I seem to do all the romantic gestures while he does little or even none. What do people think?

Answer 1

You seem to have many expectations about the relationship that you can't really get through to him. You're scared of getting bored with him though you love him. He doesn't seem worried about it and it seems he's rather comfortable with the dimension the relationship has.
So i guess the problem is that you want him to surprise you all the time, to reassure you, to give you confidence, to make you see that you'll never get tired of having him or that he'll always feel wonderful about having you cus nothing happens the same all the time when you're together.
Did you tell him what you feel? Silence doesn't speak( unless it says "i'm upset") so he can't understand why you're upset if you don't say anything.
If you talk and see what happens next, then you'll know if it's a compatibility problem.

I should add that, if you don't feel secure enough, it's either you've not found what you're looking for, or you're too scared to accept that this is what you wanted... and now you want to change it.
well , just my opinion. i don't know you. lol.
hope this helps.

Answer 2

I think its not the question of compatibility as much as the question of bordom and repeatativeness. Both of you need something new and challenges to spice up your s e x life.

You probably need a holiday, romantic one and spicy one too, where you could try to explore new venues and even new ideas. Unusual love making can be great stimuli. Have you tried it.

Your silence during the upset time is not helpful. Its also very strange for a woman.Usually its men who go silent when upset. So, be open,discuss it with him and be frank and romantic too.

All the best!/

Answer 3

Sounds to me like you are in that nasty "comfort" rut... you are in love but out of ideas on how to keep it interesting. When two people find a routine they tend to get bored and start to have negative thoughts and feelings (very normal)
if you are truely worried about your capatibility then sit down and think it out... what has kept me here so far?... what is it I can/can't live without?... Is this my forever mate or have I been mistaken up until this point? You know in your heart the answer to these questions and you already know what you should do. The only thing left to do is face it and except it...live it. good luck to you