Not really a death: My girlfriend watched me have a seizure while we were alone with no one else to help. I was contorting my body in every weird possible way and gasping, while choking and coughing up foam/blood from what I understand. This was over a month ago and she still can't be around me she gets so nervous, shaky, nauseous and anxious, pretty much all of the above. We've been together for almost 4 years and this is ruining our relationship. Please some help?
2007-03-09 20:01:47 · 9 answers · asked by Keyser 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Not really a death: My girlfriend watched me have a seizure while we were alone with no one else to help. I was contorting my body in every weird possible way and gasping, while choking and coughing up foam/blood from what I understand. This was over a month ago and she still can't be around me she gets so nervous, shaky, nauseous and anxious, pretty much all of the above. We've been together for almost 4 years and this is ruining our relationship. And she has been with me to hte doctors and both in the hospital and knows more then I do about seizures now.Please some help?
2007-03-09 20:33:22 · update #1
Try regarding the seizure as a 'third person'.
Talking about the seizure as distinct from you is a way of aligning you and your girlfriend together to face the issue.
Suggest that when you are 'not present', you would be grateful if she could hold on for you until you 'get back'.
The other half is that she is traumatised, and probably needs someone else to get the message across. Sounds like she sees you and the seizure as one right now. A mutual friend who can get your message across would be invaluable.
Be prepared to accept her decision whatever the out come too...
2007-03-09 20:34:34 · answer #1 · answered by extn49 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My mom has watched me die and be revived before we just dot really talk about it its actually easier that way. I have asthma and some other serious med conditions. My body went into shock after an allergy shot the doc shut everybody out of the room does anyone agree that now some docs and hospitals have no sense sometimes when people were kept for concussions and stuff about 4 years ago and now they send them home almost as soon as they are diagnosed some docs have sense though thankfully my mom and bro rushed me to the hosp. and the docs were great but some need to be sent back to med school
2007-03-10 13:39:32 · answer #2 · answered by Un-Happy Gilmore 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a nurse for 20 years,I have seen many deaths,I also watched as both of my parents died.Death is not an easy subject for alot of people to broach.You have to face your own mortality.Most people do not think of death and what comes after.Death scares alot of people,b/c it is fear of the unknown.She may need to see a grief specialist.Mean while do not speak of a seizure as death.Death and seizures are different things all together.
2007-03-09 20:58:00 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your girlfriend needs a wakeup call. She needs a reality check on how likely this situation is to occur again. She needs to devise a plan of action for what she will do in the future if such an event were to happen. It makes life much easier when you have a survival plan in mind. She can even write down the actions she will follow or what she will do and carry this ‘survival card’ with her (when she is with you).
So before I went off on the above lot, I planned to suggest this. I think she should use the method I talk about in my “Best Answer” response to this question: http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AhSO4nfO1TBIJ2u70htFw_Xsy6IX?qid=20070308234943AAokXIM&show=7#profile-info-ZKyDOKqOaa
I don’t want to type it all out again, but it definitely gives a method that is useful for helping one identify feelings and thoughts (and what to do about them). Anyway, let me know if you have any other questions - and check it out!
2007-03-09 20:44:02 · answer #4 · answered by jennainhiding 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
she is anxious cuz she probably felt helpless and scared while watching you seize. knowledge is power. u need to help her get educated and informed about seizures and arm her with things that she can do for you if u seize. if she has and is aware of things that she can do for u during the episodes she wont feel too scared. also make sure u take ur medications.
2007-03-09 20:30:51 · answer #5 · answered by braille 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I suspect your girlfriend is in need of some de-traumatisation. There are some good therapists out there.who do this really well, sometimes in only a few sessions.
You could try these websites for some further assistance.
http://www.hgi.org.uk/register/effectivecounselling.htm
http://www.bullyonline.org/stress/ptsd.htm#DSM-IV%20Diagnostic%20criteria
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/search/search
2007-03-09 21:38:33 · answer #6 · answered by NineLivesBurra 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It would help to have her talk to your doctor, so she knows what to do if it happens again. Right now, she really is afraid of your dying, and your speaking of it like death probably doesn't help. Talking to an expert for a few minutes will help a lot.
2007-03-09 20:06:08 · answer #7 · answered by Katherine W 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you and her need to sit down and talk about it, especially if it can happen again. She needs to figure out if she can handle all this. Give her some space to think about it. It probably scared her.
2007-03-09 20:40:31 · answer #8 · answered by Scorpius59 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I watched my mother die of cancer in my arms and I was seriously watching her die as she took her last breath and I still have flash BACKS!
2007-03-09 20:29:15 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋