I've been invited to a destination wedding where there are multiple events over three days? Would it be rude to attend only the wedding and reception? Or should I make an appearance at the welcome dinner, wedding and reception (of course), after party and brunch the next day?
Please let me know. I'm not a close relative. I really do think that it's a bit much to ask someone to spend all that time celebrating a wedding, but I don't want to offend or ruin the bride's weekend.
2007-03-09 19:19:02 · 7 answers · asked by misa 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
So hard to choose a best answer, for this one. I'll probably be using a little of everyone's advice, to navigate this social situation.
So thanks "Mark in Boulder" for reminding me to take the high road. "Matt's Mommy" I'm definitetly going to clue them in on my decision with passing conversation. And "Shellie" thanks for reminding me that they are reasonable people who just want people to share in their day.
2007-03-12 11:05:16 · update #1
No, You do NOT have to attend all the festivites. Generally destination weddings make a perfect excuse for the guests to turn it into a vacation so the couple was probably trying to be sure the guests would have some arranged fun while there.
The ONLY things you are required to do is RSVP so they know how many people to expect and pay your own way. (Which means should you stay all three days you need to pay for hotel room, food, etc. for 3 days unless they went all out and paid for everyone which is extremely rare.)
When you RSVP let them know you will only be able to attend the wedding and reception so that they have proper count for the other festivites, should they need it.
2007-03-09 21:53:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
This is the first time I have heard of such a wedding. It would be the polite thing to do to make an appearance at all of the functions., you don't need to stay long at the ones you don't really want to attend. Or, you could opt out except for the wedding and reception. However, I don't know if the couple you are invited to their wedding if they are from another culture or not. I knew of a family from India who had a wedding celebration for their daughter that lasted nine days. I hope this answers your question. Take care.
2007-03-10 03:26:05 · answer #2 · answered by SAK 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
no, my friends that have had a destination wedding knew they were already asking a lot having people spend so much money and time to watch them get married. Not everyone that came to the wedding could come for the festivities. My friends were just glad they could make it to the ceremony and reception. Definitely let them know, RSVP, so they can plan accurately.
2007-03-11 14:01:27 · answer #3 · answered by Shellie 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think you are ok with not going to all of the other festivities. If you are paying for your own trip, don't worry about it. The bride & groom probably planned all of those events to occupy their guests, if you don't need occupying, don't go!
In passing conversation beforehand say, "I'm so excited about your wedding . i've always wanted to visit ___ and am going to take this opportunity to do some sight seeing. unfortunately, I'm going for just a few days so I think I'm going to skip out on the brunch. I hope you guys have a great time and I can't wait to see you get married."
2007-03-10 08:05:50 · answer #4 · answered by Level Headed, I hope 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
If your not terribly close to the bride, i doubt seriously she would get offended...you may want to tell her ahead of time that you wont make it to all of the events so she doesnt plan for your presense.
2007-03-10 03:22:11 · answer #5 · answered by B 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hit all the major events and go out of your way to take the high road, you'll be fine.
2007-03-10 03:27:58 · answer #6 · answered by Mark in Boulder 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
yes, that's what's planned and why you are going
2007-03-10 06:48:26 · answer #7 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋