My b/f is really busy lately & i hate the fact we can't spend some time together! It really annoys me when we have arguments & end up without talking for days which isn't that good! I feel a distance now even though we both love each other a lot still! We have been going out for 4 years & we wanted to marry! But it just recently i'm getting very mad & just fights with him for everything! I think i should adjust according to his situation even if he doesn't....i should support him in a way that he would appreciate me instead of feeling very annoyed! We talk on the phone but somtimes he'll be lost even on the phone.....just too much stuffs to think in his head so that gets me mad when i think he can't even afford some time to talk to me or give his full attention! How can I support him without getting mad that he's busy for me! & how can i smooth this curve line between us recently! I reall think i should but everytime i take some action thinking to adjust it, next minute we fight more!
2007-03-09 17:03:13 · 9 answers · asked by Girl 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Are you "NAGGING HIM TO DEATH"
2007-03-10 09:31:56 · answer #1 · answered by American breed 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you just ask him what he needs from you right now and whether it is the relationship that is no longer satisfying or whether he is just stressed? It's always better to ask someone what they need from you than to try and guess or read their mind. See what he feels would be helpful. But don't neglect your needs either. Hopefully he will also want to hear what you are needing from him and will be willing and able to listen to how you feel. Often times people end up in a stand off like this because both are trying so hard to be heard that neither is listening. Be the one to change this pattern and try to put your needs aside, at least temporarily, and try to focus first on hearing what he says and trying to understand. Share with him what you hear him saying to make sure you really do understand what he needs and to let him know you are listening. Often times when one person makes the first move this way it is like magic and the other person can then give back once their needs are being met.
Also try and find other things and friends that you enjoy and find satisfying in order to meet the needs he is unable to meet for you right now. It will help you to feel less frustrated and resentful and to depend on him less when he isn't available.
If the situation still doesn't improve or seems not to be a temporary one, than you need to seriously re-evaluate the relationship.
2007-03-10 01:45:45 · answer #2 · answered by Opester 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi, you are such a lucky girl to have a man who loves you, and you mentioned you are planning to marry, that is great You sound like you are cross with yourself, try treating yourself kindly instead. There alot of women out there who have lazy slobs for husbands, go to the pub everyday and do nothing to help out with the kids etc. I truly understand where you are coming from but what I am trying to tell you is that your man is out there busting his backside to create a future for BOTH of you, so please try and give him some slack. I used to whinge and complain about my first husband, never home etc. etc. in hindsight I realise that he was doing the best he could for those he loves. Do you have a friend you could catch up for with, or a hobbie, even a nightime tafe course. If you get busy, you won't be relying on your man to be there for you all the time. I wish you all the best, hope you let us know when the wedding date is set.
2007-03-10 01:43:52 · answer #3 · answered by judles 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just think about this, I am single in a new area and I am a nursing student. I have no one to take care of me but myself and my parents. I will be glad to have someone thats helping taking care of me, but he do owe u at least one day a week. Life is to short to busy all the time and you never know when you will be taken that dirt nap.I have a cousin that was 30, him and his girl got into it in DEC. and In Jan. he was killed and she did not get to say goodbye or anything. So supprot him and if you can be with him while he is busy some time then be there, but he have to give u at least one day.
2007-03-10 01:10:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well all i can tell ya is in my case im bearing with it my boyfriend is a work aholic and it almost come inbetween us . things are a little better but i want to see him more than i do. all you can do is tell him how much you miss him and how much you enjoy being with him when he is around maybe he will see the problem first hand. ya its a lonely life when you,r partener cant find a way to fit you into his life and show you some attention . im sorry to hear it and i hope it gets better for you .
2007-03-10 01:28:35 · answer #5 · answered by angelblossom1963 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Both of you do the Communication Course at a Scientology center.
2007-03-13 15:05:56 · answer #6 · answered by robthomasjr2000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Long story short, you guys are finished. Guys act like that when they have had enough or they are dating someone else. Sorry to tell you, but it's over regardless of what you try. It's best to cut ties now instead of getting hurt later on.
2007-03-10 01:08:04 · answer #7 · answered by InTheWright 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Give him space and find a hobby
2007-03-10 01:43:24 · answer #8 · answered by sunflare63 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is definitely time to move on; end of story.
2007-03-10 01:30:26 · answer #9 · answered by DEE 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋