No-one can be forced to want them, can they? is it purely everyones individual choice?I Should I feel bad in some way?
2007-03-09 15:49:12 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
No, it is not selfish and you should not feel bad. It is a personal choice. However, if you are married and went in giving your partner the idea that you did want kids and you are now changing your mind, you are not just affecting your life, but your partner's life too. That is something to think about. I waver on whether or not I want children, but I'm almost 38 and soon nature is going to take care of the decision for me, if it hasn't already. I can't see myself being one of those women having kids in her 40's. Just in the last couple years my husband and I are making a decent living and you know what? We would like to enjoy it now. Not have to spend it all on rearing a child, which is exactly what would happen. Plus, I happen to love my freedom. I know there would be none of that anymore either. Oh, and I also like sleep, and I know that would also be out the window. I see my friends with kids and honestly wonder how they survive sometimes. And these are two-parent families. And it's still hard. If you end up being a single parent (which is something you often can't predict) I can't imagine how those brave souls do it everyday.
2007-03-09 18:37:32 · answer #1 · answered by LindaLou 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well you don't say who is trying to force you into wanting a child.
You have the right to feel how you feel. But if for some reason there is a child involved or future child involved I think that both potential parents should be involved in the decision of what to do.
If a spouse needs a child to feel complete then that can be an iffy subject to. I mean how do you put one person's needs or wants ahead of the other.
If it is an out side source then tell them to mind their own business.
It is a personal choice to an extent, if it does not effect some one else's life. In a negative way.
I don't believe a woman should be able to get an abortion if the father of the baby wants a baby and is willing to raise the child.
If every one agrees then no problem.
2007-03-09 16:19:04 · answer #2 · answered by angie 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No if you know that you don't want children then that's your choice, and you should stick to it and not feel bad.On the other hand to bring a helpless baby into the world and not want it would be wrong,then you should feel bad. You should be proud of your self for making such a wise decision if you know that is not what you want.After all later in life you may very well change your mind! Good luck and best wishes
2007-03-09 17:07:41 · answer #3 · answered by Sunshine 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, I think there are some people who are just not made to have children. If you are absolutely sure you don't want them, and are perfectly happy without them, then it'd be better for you not to have them. I would feel sad for any child that has a parent that doesn't really want them. No you should not feel bad, but seriously think about your choice and why you don't want them. And if it's still a no, then get fixed so that you don't accidently have them. Good luck.
2007-03-09 15:54:41 · answer #4 · answered by Lindsay M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is your life and your choice. It would be selfish if you had them when you didnt really want them.
Dont feel bad about your decisions. It is not for everyone. I have a 3 week old son and i realise that you make huge sacrifices when you have kids to lead a completely different life and i think it is something you have to want to do whole heartedly.
Best wishes to you.
2007-03-09 16:53:48 · answer #5 · answered by Boo Boo 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Smart of you to know that you aren't the child type!
I wish some parents would have figured that out before having their kids. The kids were fine but their parenting lacked everything.
Some of us have a natural knack for parenthood and do want to fullfill that need in our life.
No, your not selfish or should you feel bad...
YOUR JUST WISER THAN SOME!
2007-03-09 17:33:07 · answer #6 · answered by Sadi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it is not selfish to know that you do not want children. Those who would call you selfish are in fact themselves being selfish by expecting someone else to live up to THEIR expectatons. If you don't want to have children then don't. the worst possibly reason to have kids is because someone else thinks you should. Enjoy your life as it is...YOUR life not an attempt to live someone else's idea of what your life should be.
2007-03-09 16:20:58 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really know that for sure, great!! Go save the world, spend your life in a lab inventing the AIDS vaccine, stay out every night partying. Many fun things that you can do when do dont have kids
2007-03-10 04:09:51 · answer #8 · answered by Hopi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not at all. Someone who doesn't want children, really shouldn't have them, because you would probally not be a great parent! Some people just aren't into it. Although children are an amazing thing, you may one day change your mind though!
2007-03-09 16:18:34 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no you should not feel bad. if kids weren't unruly, stubborn, cry-babies, and expensive, i would say that i want to have kids. they are a hand full. and you are responsible for the 18 years of their life. i used to want kids but wokring with and living with some of them has changed my mind. i don't like kids who talk back to you or run away from you. lord have mercy on me. lol
no it is not selfish even though you are going to have a parent tell you the opposite.
2007-03-09 15:56:45 · answer #10 · answered by averilyn06 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋