I have done alot for this girl I'm dating,ex. brought her food and medicine when she was sick, loaned her money,bought her a new phone when hers broke all in all just have done alot for her but when I ask her for something she can't seem to do it,and i'm fed up am i being selfish?Like today she called me at noon and asked me to pick her up soemthing so i did and when i asked her for something she could'nt even do it..
2007-03-09 12:46:31 · 9 answers · asked by angels and airwaves 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
ok maybe not selfish but pissed that she only wants me 2 do things for her but when i ask 4 something she can't do it.
2007-03-09 12:51:11 · update #1
YES! If you're ever doing something just because you want something in return, then you shouldn't do it. Instead, say "I'll pick up the whatever if you...." so she knows, up front, what the price tag is!
Real friends, though, engage in a "give and take." I do something nice for you and, in return, you have the decency to do something for me. If she's not reciprocating, it means that she's not really your friend and that she's not falling for you manipulations.
So either quit doing stuff for her or quit trying to use it as leverage for getting her to do stuff.
2007-03-09 12:50:58 · answer #1 · answered by Jackie Blue 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She may be in a position that she cant. Just by going on what you told here, thats a real possibility. However, there are gals that will take what you have and never give in return, (my experience with most gals Ive been with). Most will do that., but dont feel bad about that, weve all been there at some point or another. You just need to back off her and see what comes of that. Give it a rest with her and when she asks, just tell her you need to move on. Be straight up with her, dont keep being her dog and fetching for her forever. As far as feeling selfish, The good you do now will pay off in another fashion, thats for sure. Let her go and move on. Do not invest in this no more than you have to. Good Luck.
2007-03-09 20:57:04 · answer #2 · answered by tennman012000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all it all depends on what you're asking her. Second it doesn't seem that your being selfish it sounds like she is. Third if what your asking her isn't so hard then dump her but before you do that try talking to her. she might not notice what shes doing
2007-03-09 20:52:25 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You gotta find yourself a girlfriend who is a flexible giver. This one sounds like a taker. A girl who expect you to cater to her needs. Dump her and dump her fast as this will only get worse.
Relationships is about give and take. She should be offering you backrubs and help you carry groceries ect. that is a giving personality.
If you don't stand up to her then you are a doormat.
2007-03-09 20:50:25 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes because your motives for your good deeds become questionable. You lose integrity when you expect something in return. Some people like the whole favor for a favor thing, but you shouldn't try to please people unless you're doing it out of genuine affection.
2007-03-09 20:50:51 · answer #5 · answered by The Maverick 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont think thats selfish at all! i dont think she deserved you if she doesnt give as she gets. shes not a very good person or gf. bottom line: ur not selfish
2007-03-09 20:55:32 · answer #6 · answered by ms.bootyfull 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it sounds like you are her errand boy. Next time she asks, you need to be busy. Seriously.
2007-03-09 20:54:17 · answer #7 · answered by Li 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, virtue is its own reward.
2007-03-09 20:49:09 · answer #8 · answered by WC 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
shelfish
2007-03-09 20:49:53 · answer #9 · answered by knowitall 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋