What should I do???

Question

I have been talking to my now boyfriend for a year now and we are expecting our first child after a recent miscarriage. When I came to college a couple of years ago I left my family back home and moved 6 hours away to a smaller city but in the same state, this is where I met my boyfriend. All of his family and friends are here but ever since we have been together there has been outside drama thats put our relationship through trails but we've seem to be taken them well and moving on. Now that Im far enough along in this pregnancy that I know Im going to have this baby I think it would be best if we move back to the city I originally came from because I dont want to raise my child around all the drama that goes on here. I know you cant always avoid drama but the kind we experince here would be a huge strain on our relationship and our baby. When I talked to him about it he was in agreement but now he doesnt wanna leave his momma behind and is second guessing comin wid me b/c I AM LEAVIN

Answer 1

My advice is go be with your family...... he agreed and is now changing his mind, probably after talking to his Momma. I think it's more important for you, the new mother, to be around your Mom, etc.... and if he is wavering already and not seeing what is best for the baby and you both, you may end up raising this child on your own anyway. And if that's the case, you will need your friends and family as your support system. I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 2

Now this is a tough question! I am not even going to attempt to answer it, but mabye I could give you a few things to think about:

Are you making this decision solely for your own benefit or have you considered ALL the alternatives.

Do you think it is fair to make this life and relationship-altering decision without considering the strain you are about to put on the baby's father and your child-to-be? A child does need both of their parents and sometimes we must make SACRIFICES in our own lives for the sake of the child.

Have you tried more than once to talk to your boyfriend? Have you considered bringing in a neutral party that the both of you respect (relative, clergy, boss, etc.) and coming to some kind of agreement?

I would think about this long and hard because this decision will definitely change the lives of EVERYONE involved.

Answer 3

I used to live in a small town and I know what you are talking about...small town drama...everyone knows everyone's business. Get outta there! If he loves you and wants what is best for your relationship and for your child then leaving his mother will not be the end of the world. He's about to have his own family and he needs to do what is right for you guys...momma should have nothing to do with it!

Answer 4

Honey there's gonna be drama everywhere.Whether it be his side of the family or yours.I congratulate you for thinking of your baby & by all means do what's right for all of you.I mean I'm sure he's old enough to live without his mommy near by he needs to start a life of his own & not keep clinging to mommy.The only way I would say its ok to be close to mom is if she were an elderly person who could not care for herself or if she was sick.Other than that you do what's best for you & your baby!More power to you!

Answer 5

Ouch, that's a tough one. Have you ever thought about moving somewhere where neither of your families are...someplace a little more neutral where you guys don't feel torn, and driving distance is fair to both sides of the family??
If he loves you and your child together you both should be able to agree on living arrangements and make it work.

Good Luck!

Answer 6

I think its a good idea to leave. No baby deserves to grow up in an inviroment anything less than loving.