Should I end this relationship?

Question

I have been in a beautiful relationship for about 6 years now. My man is the best thing that ever happened to me. I really believe that we have that perfect partnership that everyone in the world seeks and should have. The problem: He NEVER wants to get married. We are both 30. I am not comfortable with us simply being bf and gf when we're in our 40's, 50's and so on. I do eventually want to marry. Should I end this to find someone that eventually wants to 'seal the deal'?? Or stay with my happy relationship unmarried forever??

Answer 1

I am the same way. Guys look at it differently than women. To a man, marriage just complicates things. Personally, I think you should just hang in there if you love him and in due time, he might just surprise you. I know this isn't what you wanted to hear and I'm sorry. I hope this helps and I wish you the best.

Answer 2

You have to decide if it's a dealbreak for you. Sounds like it is. It's not the perfect partnership if you don't have the same goals. Keep your standards high and seek someone who you have a true perfect partnership with. I'm sure it's a topic you've been over many times with your bf, but why doesn't he want to get married? Some men are truly stubborn and obnoxiously so, but sometimes it's just the relationship that doesn't work for him. I hope that's not the case because if you were to break up and he met someone and did get married, I know your heart would break, but that happens sometimes.

I think it's not a completely happy pairing and you will start to resent him. If he won't give you what you want, it's not worth it. Move on and save yourself the heartache of dragging it out further.

Answer 3

Why do you need to be married? You have everything going in your relationship and now you want to throw a wrench into it? I was with my ex wife for 5 years before she talked me into getting engaged and a year later we were married. Almost immediately are relationship seemed to change. After 4 years I was done with it and it took me 4 more years to finally get out of it. The only thing that physically changed was a ring on a finger. Mentally it went to heck in a handbasket and was the worst move we made as a couple. if you are worried about what society thinks of you being in your 40's or 50's and still be dating, screw society and live your happy life.
Good luck in whatever you decide.

Answer 4

Well, first off...you're not that 'perfect' partnership since you clearly are not on the same page. IF you actually stepped back and took a long unbiased look at your relationship (since we can't) you'd see other areas your not on the same page. I find it hard to believe after 6 years you're still holding out and hoping he'll jump up and say, 'Oh yeah btw NOW i'm ready for marriage!!!!'.

Reality...life is to short. There are thousands of people out there that you can have the same or better relationship with than your man.

End it.

Answer 5

I think your relationship is going well. But, you want to marry eventually. I do not think remaining with him unmarried will continue to make you happy. See where I am getting at? At 30, you are happy. If you are not married at 40, I think you will be unhappy.

I think you should give him an ultimatum of marry me or we break up. If he balks, then I think you should end the relationship. You, yourself, have answered your own question. Best of luck.

Answer 6

I think that u should do what really makes u happy, i think that's any girl dream and the guy cant deal with it its because their not sure about the relationship, talk to him about it, and if he still don't want to get marry break up with him, maybe that put him to think that Ur serious about it. Like they said "if he comes back to u is because he was always your but he don't he was never yours. So if he rally love u he's gonna do it, to make u happy.

Answer 7

To be honest, you should talk to him about it. Tell him it'll end if he doesn't think about it. Obviously you both want each other for the rest of your lives, right? RIGHT? You have to think about what you BOTH want, not what ONE of you wants. Marriage is a powerful thing, it basically states who you are because of who you are with. Obivously he's not that commited to you that he wants to get married, or maybe something else is going through his mind. Find out, you know never until you try! Good luck!

Answer 8

I think you need to tell him how you feel - not that he'll suddenly marry you but you need to say this is so important to me - does he want children?
Although marriage doesn't change much to your relationship (I lived with my spouse before marriage) it was the idea of being a family. Do you live together?
It's up to you if you think he will never change his mind you may have to tell him you may have to end this "perfect" relationship. Good Luck!

Answer 9

if he is the best thing that has ever happened to you, than a little thing like getting married should not break you up. good men are hard to come by. and heres something, i know of many people who never got married and stayed together until they died. but if it means that much to you, just tell him it means that much to you.

Answer 10

Honestly, marrage is what people do because of culture, influenced by religion. Toss all that nonsense out of the way and ask yourself honestly "Can I stand to be with someone for the rest of my life potentially without being married?" If you think you can do it (despite the possibility of family or friends not approving) then go for it. It's all about what is important to you and your boyfriend.