How does this effect a child?

Question

I have a 2 1/2 year old son that has never been in day care nor have I been away from him for more than 4 hours at a time. I am considering going to work for a year full time. That means I would then be away for 9-10 hours a day. His grandmother watches him but how would it effect him to have me gone suddenly for that amount of time?

Answer 1

Most places will let you break him in gently, an hour, then half a day and so on. He will probably love it. He's at the age where he needs to start mixing with other children and making his own friends.

Answer 2

Anything you do effects your kids, the younger they are the more it effects them. Work it in gently if you decide to do this as another poster said.
It is better if you stay home. Our kids are corrupted enough when they go to real school. 0-5 is when their main morals are achieved however.
If by daycare, you mean grandma, then it wouldn't be so bad. At least he would be with family, of which assumed would have the same morals as you would instill without the outsiders, and it won't feel as bad for him.
He may and likely will like daycare, but the side effects is what I don't like. Studies have shown it causes aggressiveness and such, but some families it's the only option in today's world.
Always check out your daycare before you put him in it. They are not all the same and some are not safe. Watch how interaction from the care givers takes place and what kind of other kids your son will be around. The building condition and set up. Ask about scheduled activities.

Answer 3

In the long run, kids are resiliant. There are happy, successful people who were from stay-at-home-mom-families and those whose mothers worked full time. So, if you need to...I wouldn't worry about it too much. I might try to make the transition over the course of a couple weeks though. If he's with someone he knows well, it will make it a lot easier for him. The most important thing is for him to know that you will come back and that you love him. Make sure the time you do get to spend with him is high quality time.

That being said...in my personal experience...I could never do it. I think working part time is the best of both worlds. Work a little, time away for both is healthy...but 9-10 hours a day for 5 days a week is a lot of time you will be missing of your child's development. You will never get that time back. If you don't really have a choice, I don't want to make you feel guilty...but really think long and hard if you are not forced to go back to work full time. Good luck with whatever you do. He is adorable!

Answer 4

Kids this age are highly resiliant... not to say that he wouldn't miss you like crazy! For toddlers, it is all about the routine. If you have a consistent routine, a loving caregiver (grandma is a good choice), lots of activities to stimulate his brain, and you keep it all going on a consistent basis, he will get the idea of the new routine quickly. It will affect him to have you gone for such long periods... he may react in several ways, from withdrawing to acting out. Behaviors will certainly change as he adapts to his new routine. I cant' tell you for sure how he will react, since I don't know him or his personality. Both of my daughters reacted in different ways from one another. One was pretty easy-going, and the other cried for a month when I'd drop her off. It depends a lot on their personality, and how you handle it. If you drop them off everyday with a smile and "I love you" and "I'll be back later", you'll have more success than if you hang around, act unsure of your decision to leave them, and cry when you go. The most important part of a new routine is to make it consistent, so you may want grandma to develop a routine close to what you do at home, with naps, meals, playtime, etc. near the same times you have at home. This will ease the transition from one place to another. One bonus: the great big hugs and kisses you will get at the end of a day when you need it most!!!

Answer 5

Daycare is a better option at his age since around 2 1/2 -3 years of age kids start socializing and enjoy activities at daycare.Actually this is the perfect age to satrt daycare.
FOr some kids it's not as easy to adjust at the begining but after a couple of weeks they love it. FOr some they love it right from start. Make sure you find a quality daycare thou.
And I think grandma can't provide activities that the have in daycares.

Answer 6

i thought I would have the same problem with my son. I put him in a head start program for speech therapy, so i was really worried. The first week, he cried constantly, but after he made friends, it was no big deal. Now if I have to pick him up early for a doctors appointment or something, he freaks out. I have to drag him away from all of his friends. Like anything, it is just going to take him a while to adjust..

Answer 7

i think that you should start to practice leaving him somewhere before you start working. maybe start with just a little while and increase the time as he gets used to it. Be prepared for the worst, it took my son about two weeks of full time care to get used to being with out me, and even after that he would cry when i left for the fist few minutes, but by the time i got out of the car he was over it, that lasted for about a month. i think in the long run its always worst on us (the moms) and as long as you try to pretend that your excited and as long as your comfortable with where you are leaving him, he will be fine. i doubt there will be any long term scaring involved!! good luck with whatever you decide to do, its important to have you kids in some sort of program so they learn to interact with out you, but its also just as important to stay home and cherish every min. that you have with them. this is an age old question that i don't know if anyone can properly answer.. Again good luck

Answer 8

Is Grandma going to be the one watching him? He should be fine if this is so. He is comfortable and knows the area. At 2 1/2, he has no concept of time, but will be so excited to see you when you come home to get him.
Don't feel bad about going to work full time. Parents have to do what they have to do to provide for their families.
Good luck Hon.

Answer 9

It may be hard at first...for the both of you. I would do it gradually....bring him to the daycare, or family member that would be keeping him when you work...and gradually leave him longer amounts of time. That way, he would see that you are going to come back for him. He may even shock you, and really enjoy being away for a while. I truly think that kids need a break from their parents....just like we need a breather at times too!

Answer 10

Well, he may be upset for a couple of weeks because of his new surroundings and not being around you or your grandmother. But he will get used to it. Toddlers love consistency. It may be rough for the first couple of weeks, crying when you leave, crying when he sees you. But all in all he will get used to it. Believe me, I am an experienced toddler teacher. Also it usually is more stressful for the parent than it is for the child.