ive been with my bf for a month and a half(im 20,hes 24)We live about a half hour away and he doesnt drive,only i do.im getting REALLY frustrated with the amount of time we spend together.last sat,i saw him but we were out at a bar,sunday we went ATVing with all his buddies.on tues i saw him,with his parents.i feel like we NEVER spend any time alone.I asked him to hang out last night but he said he was too tired i told him how i feel about this and he keeps saying i shouldnt feel that way and to just 'chill'.the fact that its like pulling teeth to see him and that were never alone make me feel like he doesnt care about me.he said that his friend sees his gf once a week and they have a perfect relationship,and when i asked him if he'd be ok with seeing me 1 a week he said yes.i think that is rediculous!!especially for a new relationship.he hasnt had a gf in 2 years so should i give him more time/space?how should i handle this,should i act distant back?I dont want to just break up!
2007-03-09 09:07:01 · 13 answers · asked by kimmy_717 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I married a thoughtless jerk like this. Wasted 6 years of my life.
Find some one else!
Good luck!
2007-03-09 09:11:33 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once a week for a new relationship is reasonable... presumably you both have school or work that needs for full attention during the week, so you only have weekends to see each other. If you want to spend more time together, that is a reasonable request, but don't expect that he should want to spend every single minute of every day with you - you're not married yet.
Don't play games or "act distant" - when in doubt, communicate. Tell him that you enjoy the time you spend together, and you'd like to see him more often and spend more time "alone together." If he's into you, he'll be open to this; if he's reluctant or claims he just doesn't have the time, you'll just have to face the fact that he's just not that into you.
Then you'll have to decide if you're willing to stay with him on those terms, or cut your loses and find a man who shares your feelings about spendign time together.
2007-03-09 17:16:03 · answer #2 · answered by teresathegreat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hay, I say give him time. Im 17 and been in a realionship for about 6 months. I didnt date for most of my teenage years. For a good part of the realionship I hardly saw my bf. I dont know why. But now I wouldnt not want to see him. I call him everynight and see him on weekends and sometimes during the week. i guess what Im trying to say is just give him some time. Dont back down. Just hang in there and see if in time the situation improves. I hope it does as you sound as though your a really good person. Goodluck.
2007-03-09 17:15:44 · answer #3 · answered by Kiara 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The first thing you have to ask yourself is do I REALLY like this guy and do I REALLY want to possibly spend the rest of my life with this guy?
Your still young, so answering no to those questions is fine; you can still date each other and have fun knowing it ain't gonna last.
But if your honest answer to those questions is yes, then you need to re-evaluate your relationship with this guy. He obviously is not so into you that he wants to spend every possible waking minute with you. If he was truly into you, believe me, you guys would be spending a lot of time, alone, together.
This isn't to say he's got some other ho on the side, or maybe he does, but you can't allow yourself to fall into that pit where you totally love some guy and he's just not that into you. You'll end up getting hurt in the long run.
2007-03-09 17:18:43 · answer #4 · answered by DUM-DUM 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
End the relationship now. It will not get better. I tried dating someone like that for a year and a half. I gave and he didn't so I ended it. I figure he just wasn't that in to me, if he was he would try harder. And if that was just the type of person he was well then that wasn't for me. I then found someone really special a few months later and he would do anything for me. Love means giving ones self unconditionally and not being selfish
2007-03-09 17:12:16 · answer #5 · answered by hightower 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, thats weird. Sorry, but it is. I can understand if you had been dating for years or something, but this is a new relationship and he should be a lot more into it. Not trying to tell you what to do, as only you can make that choice. But its strange in my book that a guy would start dating a girl and not want to spend time with her.
2007-03-09 17:11:40 · answer #6 · answered by saintyopa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Back off for more than a week and when he calls you that he wants to spend time with him tell him you are tired or that you cant right then because you have some things you gotta do... Feed him the same crap and see how far it goes!!! PLAY THE GAME GIRL!!! Then he will feel like you are feeling right now!!! TRUST ME!!!!!!!!!
2007-03-09 17:12:27 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have the same problem, my bf lives in PA i live in NYC......and we been going out for about 4 months now and i only seened him 5 times........and i understand why he can't come over all the time...sometimes i think he got another girl or something......but just try to understand him.....i'm trying my best to understand my bf.......right now i think i need some time away from him because he dosen't give me attention......so think about!!
2007-03-09 17:15:34 · answer #8 · answered by Diana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kimmy, stop panicking. Be calm and let life happen without trying to control the future. Calm is strength. What you want to be happy may not be what someone else wants. Enjoy your time away from him. Enjoy your time with him.
2007-03-09 17:19:52 · answer #9 · answered by Washington 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
life is too short to spend it waiting. don't give him up, but get yourself in the mix and meet others. I'm not saying that you need to go out with others, but that will make you feel that you can if you want to.
2007-03-09 17:16:59 · answer #10 · answered by danthequestioner 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋