Folks are always making disparaging remarks about my Lord and Noodly Master, the Flying Spaghetti Monster. One person even made this comparison between worshipers of the Judeo-Christian deity and worshipers of the FSM: "One religion worships the Creator of the universe and one worships a pile of food."
Why would someone call my beloved FSM a mere "pile of food"? Why is it so hard to believe that HE is your god?? Why will you not reach out and touch his Noodly Appendage™? He's waiting for you to acknowledge his Pastavinity... and you know deep in your heart that you want to, don't you?
2007-03-09 05:30:10 · 35 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
If they see the graph of global warming vs. number of pirates, and still aren't convinced, then they may just be no hope for them.
However, you can do what some other religions do: prey on the weak. Find people who are desperate, and make them surrender all self-control to the FSM. Then they'll get this blissful "born again" experience. The only thing you have to do after that point is keep reinforcing their beliefs with FSM literature. Unfortunately, we're a little behind on this. We need to get people to record more FSM music, print more FSM books, make more FSM films, etc.
2007-03-09 05:36:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Those foolish enough not to believe in the omni-taste of the FSM are doomed to live a life of Kraft macaroni and cheese. They will never know what they are missing. The FSM is at least a god whose truth can be tasted. Why do so many people prefer a god with no taste?
2007-03-09 05:55:42 · answer #2 · answered by Fred 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
good judgment: 2.3% of the international is atheist, or, a pair of million individual in 50. If forty 9 human beings have self assurance something, and a million does not, guess this is extra possibly to be superb suited? Testimony - a lot of human beings have encountered God, and wrote down what they experienced. a number of those bills are in the Bible, which has had 1900-3500 years of Peer evaluation (reckoning on the e book). different writings are actually not in the Bible, yet, there are countless them. very own experience - i'm individual who has encountered God myself, and that i could say, the experience may be overwhelming. I genuinely have additionally witnessed (and carried out) therapeutic by technique of religion, the main useful being a death female who grew to become into cured at precisely 3:18pm on a Thursday - as recorded by technique of each and every of the scientific kit that she grew to become into hooked as much as. What shocked me the main is that the nurses, and medical doctors weren't all that fussed. it variety of feels that they have seen dazzling therapeutic formerly, and, jointly as they have been worried on the subject of the affected person, the therapeutic grew to become into taken as extraordinarily habitual.
2016-09-30 10:50:15 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Having the Noodly appendage placard on your bumper isn't enough? Sorry believing in your deity, however good he tastes, would require me to renounce my Atheism.
I would however, bring a nice bottle of wine and some garlic bread if you wish to exercise your faith at around 6:00
2007-03-09 05:33:41 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Hi, this is Chad at the Crisis Center. We appreciate your call. Here at the center, we believe in a live and let live policy and apologize for the insensitivity of other members. The best thing to do is ignore the hecklers and live your life. Thanks for calling and have a nice day.
2007-03-09 05:40:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't believe in God, but that doesn't mean I'll poke fun at other peoples religion. I am sure Christians try to respect other peoples faith. Like you, I also have a religion but it is different because we don't believe in the existence of God. That doesn't mean I'll start poking fun at your faith, so I expect people not to poke fun at mines.
2007-03-09 05:37:46 · answer #6 · answered by Magic 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To best answer this question that do not worship idols, Bible says so. Religion IS NOT going to get you nothing in this world. Religion is what man does for God, Relationship/Salvation is what God did for man. Think Jesus!!!
2007-03-09 05:50:51 · answer #7 · answered by ogre_110 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It is because of his holy profit, Bobby.
In the past, much love existed, but then he turned from piles of food to piles of booty, and lost the love of the nonbelievers.
Sigh.
I used to be a Pastafarian, but then I was touched by a bowl of rice.
2007-03-09 05:34:39 · answer #8 · answered by LabGrrl 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Apparently it needs an old book of some sort...
Preferably one with a flood story and half man half noodle god... those are historical the ones that get picked up by the masses.
2007-03-09 05:33:02 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Use more capital letters. So they know the FSM is THE TRUE GOD
2007-03-09 05:37:32 · answer #10 · answered by Tom :: Athier than Thou 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋