I have been involved with the love of my life for about 3 years. It begin when I was 18 and I was still young and immature. We have been through alot, the lying and cheating, jealously, you name it. He up and moved to Florida about 1 1/2 ago and I changed my number and haven't spoken to him the whole year. He called me the other day and said he tracked my number down. To get to the point, he wants me to move to Florida and get married. I'm not sure because I have my own place and responsiblities. I love this man and I know if I'm not with him I will not be completely happy but I don't know if I'm ready to jump up and move when we haven't really been together face to face in a while.
Need Advice... thanx
2007-03-09 04:30:35 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
We lived together in NY for 1 year and we was engaged. I loved living with him and everyday was sunshine but he was immature at that time. I still don't know why he he left. He told me he was going to Florida to set up a place for us but that was almost 2 years ago. I know he love and cares for me but i do feel like I'm sacrificing alot but if I don't I think I will always beat myself in the head and say "Here I had a man that did everything for me but I was too selfish to give up what I had to make a life with him".
Everyone is giving really good answers so thanx
2007-03-09 05:31:05 · update #1
Sound you are really unsure and you have the right to be, moving in with someone especially if they live across the country is a huge step. First of all because you have established your self in the past here nad really become your own person away from him. You say you haven't talk in a year, that's a long tme and two people can change alot in two years. Sometimes for the better and soemtimes for the worse. I suggest starting off very slow, you don't want to move in so quickly it overwhelms you. Try to visit him for a week or two and spend time together and see how things go first. Once you do that then you will know whats right for you.
good luck
2007-03-09 04:39:50 · answer #1 · answered by dreamangel1102002 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you serious? Listen honey, if this guy actually loved you he would not have left 1 1/2 years ago. Not sure you are getting the whole story here. Why did he suddenly change his mind? Plus, I am sure you will find someone that you don't have to worry about the lying and cheating that will make you completely happy. You are only 21!!! Live life a little while longer before getting married.
2007-03-09 12:38:18 · answer #2 · answered by Randy H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't jump into things right now. Think back and remeber why it didn't work the first time. I'd reconnect slowly and see if things have really changed. Another problem is you don't know how each other have changed over the course of a year and a half. You probably aren't the same people and once together you may not even feel the same way .
2007-03-09 12:37:50 · answer #3 · answered by specklesanne_13 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a romantic at heart and I guess you should go for it! The reason is that first of all, dont worry abt why he had moved.. ppl make mistakes but it is clear he missed you a lot and thus tracked u down.. secondly, he is not messing up with u and is proposing marriage, which is a positive sign provided he has a stable job or a degree... Girl just go for it! U know u love him.. why wonder all ur life.. "what if i had moved".. just do it and see what happens.. I wish u all the best!
2007-03-09 12:39:27 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nessa, how you still love the man and haven't been with him in a year and a half. You mean to tell me you haven't met any other guys, you haven't had sex since him? Then you also said there was lying and cheating, that should be enough right there to let it go, unless you were the one who was doing the cheating. If he left you before he can and probably leave you again. You need to think hard on this one and pray about it too.
2007-03-09 12:35:41 · answer #5 · answered by madtyga2002 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why after a year and a half he decides now that he wants to marry you? Where was that devotion when he was packing to go to Florida? You can marry him, if you want a life packed with lying, cheating, and jealously. Ten times out of ten, the relationship that y'all had before he left is going to be the same type of relationship that y'all will always have. You don't have to rush and decide, unless he decides to up and move again.
2007-03-09 12:37:46 · answer #6 · answered by Juskics 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Difficult to help you but I would try my best. You should not jump into the marriage. You must give careful consideration first. Are both of you mature enough now? Does he have a stable job and secure financial situation? Do you really like to bear his child and take care of him and his child? Would you regret if you are not living with him in the future? If the answers to the above are "YES", tell him the truth. Share with him the difficulties and if he truely loves you, he would understand your situation and help you to solve the problems together..... and both of you would be together eventually.
Cheers.
2007-03-09 12:41:24 · answer #7 · answered by simck 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't do it if he wants you that bad he will work out things with himself like coming to see you going on dates, but why did he up an move like that and you haven't talked to him in a year! There are easier ways to get someones phone number that doesn't take a year.
2007-03-09 12:34:46 · answer #8 · answered by kingsgirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would try to reconnect slowly to be sure that your feelings are still the same when you are face to face. Then, date long distance for a period of time. After that, you will know. If you truly love him, you will feel at home with him regardless of where you live. Best of luck!
2007-03-09 12:33:47 · answer #9 · answered by ncmom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK your nice and happy here why move. Well think of it he has cheated and lied to you. Do you think he won't do it again. Especially if he knows he can get away with it. It is a good thing if you just stayed there and be happy and not gt yoru heart broken again
2007-03-09 12:36:43 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋