Should I trust him?

Question

My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 2 months. He just moved here from Jersey and keeps in contact with some of his friends from up there, which is fine. Except there is this one girl that is in love with him. He said that they never hooked up or anything like that, but his myspace messages tell a different story....kinda. It HINTS that there was something going on. But it was before we started dating. When I asked him, he told me he didn't want anything to do with her. Once he got back down here, they started talking again, which was fine. Then, she gave him her number and he called her. He denies calling her. I know for a fact he did, because she sent me a message with all the messages they exchanged and her phone number was included and I checked phone records because we are on the same plan. Should I get mad 'cause he lied? He knows I don't like her and he told me she gave him the number, but he said he didn't call. Should I trust me after this? I told him I know....

To answer a few questions...yes, she does know about me. She has from the start. He has pics of me all over his myspace, talks about our relationship all the time. She is the only one saying that they hooked up...everyone else is denying it. This is the only thing he's done to make me doubt him. I have trust issues to begin with. As I said, he did tell me that she gave him the number. And they aren't spending hours on the phone with each other. When he called her, he talked to her for about 15 minutes and so far, that has been it. His own cousin, who hates my guts and wishes we would break up, told me that he never dated her and that she was in love with him.
My ex, I had kids with him. And he use to do the same thing, only he was cheating. My boyfriend pretty much goes no where without me. For almost a month, he has been staying with me because of his house being infested with mold.
I just want to know if maybe I'm reading too much into it. Please, no negativity. thanks!

Answer 1

WELL...I KNO HOW U FEEL BECAUSE MY BOYFRIEND TALKS TO THIS GIRL THAT I KNO LOVES HIM, BUT HE WANTS "ME" NOT "HER"......ITS HARD TO TRUST THEM, BUT IF THEY NEVER DID ANYTHING TO U FOR U NOT TO BELIEVE THEM...THEN THERES NO PROBLEM.. U NEED TO TELL HIM STRAIGHT OUT THAT U KNO HE CALLED HER AND U HAVE PROOF..AND SAY U WONT GET MAD IF HE TELLS U, JUST AS LONG AS HE LETS U KNOW...BUT U HAVE TO PROMISE NOT TO GET MAD, AND IF U DO, JUST BREATH IN AND OUT OR SOMETHING...I STILL GET MAD WHEN MY B/F SAYS HES TALKING TO HIS "FRIENDS" THAT ARE GIRLS...AND WE BEEN DATING FOR 3 MONTHS NOW...i AM A LITTLE JEALOUS BUT HE NEVER LIED TO ME AND HE TELLS ME EVERYTHNG...SO Y NOT TRUST HIM!??! AND SHE BETTER NOT BE TALKING TO HIM AFTER SHE SHOWED U ALL THE MESSAGES THEY EXCHANGED..BECAUSE IF SHE DOES STILL TALK TO EM..LET HIM KNO AND HER KNO THAT U DONT LIKE THAT!!!!! HOPE IT TURNS OUT WELL!!!

Answer 2

From what you are saying he has not been straight with you from the start and that has warranted you being suspicious of his actions.
I normally give the benefit of the doubt in my relationships but if I so much as catch myself rummaging through phone bills (luckily I have never done) but that would be it for me.
If there is no trust in a relationship I know I am with the wrong man.
I have been with my partner 6 years and I KNOW he would NEVER do anything with anyone else and he, me. That is trust and that is one of the sophisticated traits that make us work without it we may as well go on our separate ways.

Don't get mad with him be matter of fact...sit down with him and explain you don't trust him...discuss it and try to find a resolution between you. Maybe somehow he could win back that trust.

At the end of the day the evidence only leads to the fact that he rang a girl and lied about it...there is no clear evidence that he cheated on you.

I really do hope that this can be resolved for you.

Answer 3

Not when it comes to this particular girl. And then of course, you will start wondering about the next girl he says is just a friend and he doesn't have feelings for, etc. ..

At least his character was shown within 2 months which means if you break off the relationship now and have no contact with him you can be over all of it within 2-3 weeks.

You deserve better then wishy washy. You know this. Believe it.

Answer 4

I think that even a little lie is still a lie, and that can damage the trust some. But you definatly need to sit down and talk to him about it, if he can't admitt to it, knowing you know the truth then there are some big leing problems there. Just communicate, that is really all I can sugest!!! Also let him know that them talking is making you uncomfortable, if he cares about you he will stop the flirting with someone he is not with!! Good luck

Answer 5

Well if its going like this 2 months down the road I sure don't want to stick around if you get to year. If you got Prof that he is 100% lien to you then how could you trust him? This guy sounds like a bad apple to me if what you say is true. I would move on now then wait later to get your heart broken. I know if it was early in my relationship I would be all over my new girl not coming up with stories or lien. If on one hand he says he did not call her and on the other the phone records say he did who you going to believe?

Answer 6

Why are you with a guy who has a myspace page?

No offense but you have only been together for two months, it's not a big deal. You are still at the getting to know each other phase. Well you are getting to know him!

Answer 7

You two are still dating, and I assume it's exclusively. If you want to keep dating, you need to not assume every woman your boyfriend has had a relationship with is still dating him. You have to trust him.

I think he's being pretty kind in not flaunting his contact with her, but if you're not down with that, break up before you completely break his heart.

Answer 8

People who lie about small things lie about big things my dear.

You said you checked the phone records, so you know youve already caught him in one lie. People will lie until they know that the jig is up.

Get rid of him.

Answer 9

sounds shady, trust him from afar. basically let him think you trust him but be watchful. that way he doesnt feel trapped by you. can you call or write to her? maybe she doesnt know about you. .. if she does karma will come around.

Answer 10

Sure

But be careful