what to do about boyfriend not being supportive?

Question

In the past week my grandmother, granfather and mother have all been admitted to the hospital for serious life threatening illnesses. Needless to say I am totally stressed out. My boyfriend seems to think life should proceed as normal with me catering to his every need. ie. dishes, dinner, laundry, changing the channel on the tv, etc. Usually I don't mind and even enjoy pampering him like this but right now I'm tired and need to chill before I have a nervouse breakdown. How can I get him to be more supportive. ( he doesn't deal well with anything emotional).

Answer 1

The best thing is to think of some specific practical things, such as getting shopping or doing the laundry.

It's best simply to ask, and to avoid criticism, even if it's warrented.

Answer 2

Sunshine, if your man can not be supportive during this caios in your life then how will he be if something else caiotic happens later on such as you getting pregnant and being hospitolized because of problems with the pregnancy, or whatever may come along in your life. Honey, you two need to talk and tell him that you feel the way you do, if he cannot understand then you need to help him understand and tell him that you cannot take all of this right now, that this is your family and blood is thick. If it was my family, my husband would just have to learn to understand. Last month him and I spent 9 days in the hospital with our 3 month old daughter that almost did not make it, infact the doctors did not think she was going to make it. My husband and I could not see our older 2 daughters for 10 days because of this... we was concidered contagous it was killing me that we could not see them ( they are 2 and 3) and he learned to help me by just supporting my decisions and being there when I needed to talk. I guess what I am trying to say that is if he cannot support you in your time of need then you really need to talk to him about supporting you or possible getting him some help, if this does not work then maybe you should think of being alone for a while until you can get through this. You need to think of yourself because a mental breakdown is not fun, and tell him that you cannot handle this on your own. Admitting to him that you cannot do this alone might be just the confedence that he needs to get him to help you with this. Take some time and sit him down and talk to him, make sure you have enough time don't cut yourself short, once this is out and in the open you need to make sure you get it all out and not just agree and go on. Does this make since? I hope this helps you.

Answer 3

I'd sit him down and say look I know you know I am dealing with some heavy emotional stuff right now and I need you to be supportive. You have two hands and two leg and I need you to reconnect them to that spine God gave you and help me do things around the house. Let him know you need to be the one doing some relaxing and calm down before you blow up and he receives the end of the big boom. Stress can cause many problems to the body from Shingles to becoming physically sick so talk to him and do some resting. You work hard and you deserve to have a minute of peace.

Answer 4

he's probable in simple terms in marvel. adult males are diverse then us, they block the flaws out of their concepts that they do no longer pick to think of approximately, as the place us lady can no longer get it out of our heads. provide him a pair weeks, and that i'm particular he will start to attain what is going on. I doubt he will bail on you, my boyfriend replaced into a similar way on the initiating. He actual did no longer comprehend it till I extra a DVD residing house of my first ultrasound. Now that i'm 38 weeks he acts like an emotional injury, and he even talks to my tummy! in case you met him, you could never be attentive to. he's complicated on the exterior, yet he's somewhat replaced interior the final couple months! Oh and by skill of how, it is 2009, i do no longer think which you will could be married to have a lifelong dedication. =)

Answer 5

If I were you, I'd take this as a huge sign. If he doesn't attempt to make your life easier when he can see you're stressed out, there is no hope for a long-term relationship. His behavior makes it obvious his primary concern is for himself, and that your primary function is to make him happy. (On a base psychology level.) If you want my advice, break up with him. He might be okay for the time being, but I've been around the block a few times and I recognize the warning signs of a disaster when I see them.

Answer 6

You need to sit him down and seriously talk to him ...tell him that if you don't get some kind of help and understanding that you will end up in the hospital..That you love him and will be their for him as soon as things chill out some and if he loves you he will understand 100%..good luck

Answer 7

What's the matter with you catering to his every need and changing the channels for him? Dump that loser. He's proving to you that if you don't put him first in everything he's not about to do a damn thing for you.

Answer 8

YOU SERIOUSLY NEED TO TALK TO YOUR MAN ABOUT HIM BEING THERE FOR YOU. IF HE'S NOT THERE NOW, HE WON'T BE LATER. THIS IS A TEST OF TRUE LOVE AND SUPPORT. I'M SURE YOU WOULD BE THERE FOR HIM WHEN HE NEEDED YOU SO WHY CAN'T HE DO THE SAME. GOOD LUCK TO YOU , YOUR FAMILY AND RELATIONSHIP. HOLD YOUR HIGH FOR YOUR FAMILY IN NEED OF YOU AND BE STRONG. BEING WEAK WILL STRESS YOU. JUST PRAY.

Answer 9

Well your boyfriend is a selfish little brat. Bad news is that you helped to make him that way. Never do things that you really don't want to for anyone, never ever do things that your heart and soul are saying no to. You really need to expose your innermost person to your boyfriend so he can see who you really are.

Answer 10

don't expect him to just pick up where you left off...talk to him and let him know how you're feeling about your family and that you'd really appreciated if he pitched in and physically stood by your side to help you with what needs to be done...don't forget that him just holding you in his arms will also make you feel better...sit with him and tell him these things...sometimes men don't stop and think unless you force them to listen in a calm un-nagging conversation (yes, I'm happily married)