How do tell your fiance that you been with for /for 3yrs that you need space? Its so hard for me to do it. Im afraid he's going to commit suicide or go nuts on me. Im just getting to realize so many wrong things about him. My problelm is I don't talk. I bottle things in. Im too nice. Its always the good ones that get screwed over. I wanna be single. I want to go on vacations with the girls, meet new ppl make new friends, learn something new. I want to be able to go somewhere and not have to say where im going, when im coming home, whos coming with me etc. This sucks.
2007-03-09 02:35:57 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You need to tell him. If you are afraid of him committing suicide or going nuts on you; you have huge problems with this relationship; besides feeling smothered and directed in everything you do.
You obviously do not want to be in a relationship with this man, let alone engaged to him. You need to tell him all of these things, and not bottle it up any longer. Good communication is the basis of a good relationship.
When you are with the person that you want to be with, and spend your life with you care about each others well being, but you also trust each other enough to not have to question every move they make when they are not with you.
He sounds as if he is insecure, and very insecure in your relationship with him if he has to constantly question you. He may be picking up on your internal unhappiness and does not want to face the fact that you no longer want to be in this relationship with him.
If he has emotional problems which are causing you to think he will harm himself or "go nuts," he sounds as if he needs some serious psychiatric counseling.
You may be more comfortable telling him in a more controlled setting, such as his parents home, or your parents home. Does
anyone else know about your unhappiness? You need to bring others in on this for you support and emotional well-being.
I do not know your age, but you sound very young, and if you are you most likely got engaged as you thought it was the next logical step in your relationship. You sound as if you have not lived your own life yet, and you definitely need to do that before the engagement and marriage; to anyone takes place.
You do not need to be telling this man that you need space, you need to be telling him that the engagement is over because he has trust issues with you. If there is no trust, there can be no relationship.
Remember, you only have one life, do not give it away to someone who does not trust you. I have been happily married for years, because we trust each other. We love being together, but we also have our own friends and interests which we participate in as individuals. This is part of a healthy relationship.
Find your voice, speak up for yourself; and move on. Good luck to both of you.
2007-03-09 03:13:34 · answer #1 · answered by Sue F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him. If he really loves you, he'll understand you. And besides, he's not going to lose you. You're just going to have some space and have fun with your life now that you're not yet married. But be sure not to leave him and find some other guy. Or like, don't get your eye caught by some other guy. :)
2007-03-09 02:48:25 · answer #2 · answered by Faye ^___^ 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell him
Or else you will feel like this for a long time and problems will never get solved.
Also if he really loves/likes you then he will respect your desion and give you the space you need/want.
2007-03-09 02:39:30 · answer #3 · answered by cr80exp2003 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know exactly what you're going thru!! I would just be honest. Tell him exactly why you want your space. Best of Luck!!
2007-03-09 03:52:43 · answer #4 · answered by Smilies 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋