I have this person in my life who sends signals that she really does not like me. She doesn't really say why but I think she is holding a grude over me. I know why she may feel anger but I have tried very hard to make her see things differenttly and I still feel the weight of her judgement by the way she treats me.. She is a Christian and this thing I did has absolutly nothing to do with her at all. My ex came to me during a weak time in my life and I gave in to a realationship with him that I knew was wrong and it lasted about 5 months but after that I brought closure to the realtionship and got my life on track. That was almost 4 years ago and other than that I have remained a comitted Christian. I was vulnerable to my ex because we were married and have kids. He is remarried and that is where I messed up. He was the one who came to me and said he was not happy. I gave in and now she will never let me live it down. Am I branded for life?
2007-03-09 00:55:22 · 11 answers · asked by java348 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Thats creepy
2007-03-09 00:57:59 · answer #1 · answered by Someone 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes I know those people. They're called "women." They can remember an unintended offense done to them 80 years ago in crystal detail, as you yourself probably can. And "Christian women" are the worst, because they never forget an offense that you ever did to anyone else either, and what they call forgiveness is simply the beginning of a life long martyrdom act they will use to guilt trip you for the rest of their lives.
Best advice. Tell her to go do something anatomically impossible to herself and cut her out of your existence. You did not do anything evil. You were just human and responding to feelings and needs that every mortal has felt and doing something that many divorced persons have done or thought of doing or wished they could do. If she can't understand that, or thinks she's invulnerable to the same kind of humanity, then she's just a judgmental jerk. Who needs those in their life?
2007-03-09 09:10:46 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Others should not judge you for you are the only one that will regret and/or have to live with your decisions you make in life. If someone is a true friend they will tell you how they feel but will not make you feel bad for the things that you can not change now. The only thing you can really do about this, if it is still bothering you or has an effect on your relationship with your friend is to talk to them openly and honestly about how you feel and ask how they feel, be prepared to hear something you might not want to. Good Luck!
2007-03-09 09:00:53 · answer #3 · answered by Rissy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yep..have known quite a few of them.. My husband, when he was alive, used to expect to me to read is mind when he wanted something or if he was upset with me about something... Sorry folks, I am not a mind-reader..
Now..about your situation...if this person does not like you, then it is her problem, not yours... Your "problem" was your "temporary lapse in judgement", which since we are human and all expected to have that once in a while..and having the bond of having kids with him only makes it that much easier to "lapse"-so to speak..
That is not her problem...as I said, it was yours...and you say that you have remained a "committed Christian" since then, so I am assuming that you have asked God for his forgiveness for what happened...
What this other person thinks about you, you can not control...
My advise to you is to "realize that you made the mistake, accept that you made the mistake, don't let it happen again...and keep your life on track"....what others think about something you did 4 yrs ago is up to them....
God Bless...
2007-03-09 09:10:30 · answer #4 · answered by Termite 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She has a right to be leary of your actions but she should not hold it or Lord over it in this situation
I believe what has happened is you are under a spirit of guilt and that spirit wont let you grow in your christian relationship.
What you did was commit adultery. adultery is a sin of the body or you have desecrated the temple of GOD.
We are not unaware of satans schemes and he uses guilt to destroy the unknowing christian.
The two of you should speak to each other concerning this and the guilt be dealt with.
2007-03-09 08:59:27 · answer #5 · answered by Tribble Macher 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He who has not yet sinned may cast the first stone. This person is ignorant. Dont let others control you like that.
2007-03-09 09:01:23 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some people just want to see if your really a Christian I guess?!?
2007-03-09 08:59:01 · answer #7 · answered by Renegade Of This Time and Age! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that a sad story..i hope my wife could not read my wife as i would have been dead a long time ago..
i can read most people minds..they all think i am a a hole
2007-03-09 08:59:41 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have an answer to this question, but you are going to have to read my mind to get it.
2007-03-09 08:58:39 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her that God has forgiven you and you have forgiven yourself and she needs to forgive you.
2007-03-09 09:00:22 · answer #10 · answered by Jeancommunicates 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋