How is his Dad, & how is Holy Mary Mother of God today?
2007-03-09 00:51:35 · 22 answers · asked by sahara_springs 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
:P
lol! I bet if you left out the word imaginary you would have gotten serious responses
2007-03-09 00:54:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hi, my name joshua kane, i am not jesus, jesus was just this kid that used to follow me around, back in the good old days - he would listen to my speeches and serve food, drink my wine and sometimes he would go for long walks to contemplate his belly button! Well, i am here to tell you about the TRONGOD, and the gospel of zerokane.THATS WHAT I WAS HERE FOR IN THE BEGINNING, but that pesky jesus, kept on bothering me. Mind you i reckon i got off lightly, you know what happened to jesus, although I was surprised that Judas grassed him up. they were lovers you know! Must have had an argument! It disturbs me a great deal that i have been forgotten, jesus that 'scamp', stole my ideas and ideals and passed them off as his own, obviously he changed a lot of my texts, facts and history, due to copyright reasons, but my disciples certainly were a little fickle, as soon as Jesus gave all that fish and bread , they were off, followed him around all day every day, 24 - 7, i think i had a lucky escape. Anyway, as i was saying, my god, my gospel is the true word! It must be true because I wrote it all in a book, but i found out recently that the 'vatican' are witholding it from publication, something about truth, reality, demise of the church and all that! Well, i'm back now, so they better be ready to apologise, give me back my book and do something about that whole 'jesus' thing. My dad says hello, and my mum is busy doing some blessings, dad isin the garden trying to make a better earth , the first one he made has really got disease infected. See you at EASTER!
x
2007-03-09 11:32:36 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh, you know .. He's just making last minute preparations for Armageddon. It's just so hard to keep the "Down" list up to date, what with so much with crime, war, preachers asking for "A man" instead of an "Amen," etc.
As you can imagine, these end-days can be very trying for a Savior - especially one with a Jewish mother who is (blessedly) hysterical about how the place is going to look when they get all the new arrivals.
Joe is his old self, not saying much, touching up a cabinet here and there. But then again he's been very quiet since Mary announced her pregnancy by her own son when he was the father (or maybe the holy ghost.)
In any case, thanks for asking!
2007-03-09 09:08:44 · answer #3 · answered by JAT 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I don't have an IMAGINARY friend called Jesus Christ. I have a real friend called Jesus Christ.
http://www.messianicbible.com/prophecies.asp prophecy
http://www.understandthetimes.org/101scientific.shtml scientific facts in the bible before known by science
2007-03-09 08:58:57 · answer #4 · answered by Me Encanta Espanol 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Poor Jesus, his stigmata is acting up again. His Dad is busy making people miserable so they can thank him for it for an eternity, and his Mother is off projecting herself onto a grilled cheese sandwich somewhere.
2007-03-09 08:57:17 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I haven't yet had the opportunity to speak with them today, but I'm sure they are doing fine. I hear Friday is waffle day in Heaven.
2007-03-09 08:54:18 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 3⤋
My Friends are doing great, after all the sun is shining and
I am able to get out of bed.
2007-03-09 08:55:27 · answer #7 · answered by dgreer58 3 · 1⤊ 3⤋
For starters, Jesus is real and not imaginary.
Wake up and smell the roses and you may see.
2007-03-09 08:57:23 · answer #8 · answered by sunflare63 7 · 2⤊ 2⤋
He is doing well, concerned about you and wondering when it will be you decide to get to know Him. He is waiting for you.
2007-03-09 08:56:36 · answer #9 · answered by VW 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
No imaginary friends here.
2007-03-09 08:55:55 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋