What is a polite way to ask for some one to RSVP that never does?

Question

I am hosting a party for my daughters first birthday. A few people I send out invites to never RSVP's by the date. I never know if they are coming or not. They often just show up even though they never return my calls. What can I put on the invite to politly asking for an RSVP so I do not have to call them? I like to make sure I have enough foods or prizes.

Answer 1

I have this problem all the time with a couple of my friends. Always the same ones.

I now always assume that they will attend. So what if there is extra food or prizes. I sure your guests would be willing to take doggy bags with them if you need to get rid of it.

As for the prizes, if you keep the receipts you could always return them. Or better yet....give them to your absent guests next time you see them explaining that you really did require a RSVP. Maybe they will get the hint.

Answer 2

How To Request Rsvp

Answer 3

Sometimes the only way people change their behavior is if they feel a little pain.

For everyone who responded, make hand lettered name tags or place tags or goodie bags. Have a few extra "generics" for those who didn't. If they come, say, oh I didn't know if you were coming or not, but don't worry, I have some extras. That way they aren't left out but they don't get the same treatment. Takes a bit of confidence to do this, but they probably will RSVP to your next gathering after that.

Good luck!

Answer 4

If you know they never RSVP, just call them a day or two after the RSVP date. Don't stress yourself over it. On your "to do" list, just put "f/u (follow up) w/Jane, Sue & Peg on RSVP". That way you haven't gotten all aggrevated over the issue.

Also, they may not be rude; just unorganized and/or forgetful.

Answer 5

Call (the number on the invitation) if you are unable to attend by the RSVP date.

Answer 6

Unfortunately many people don't know that RSVP means respond. You'll just have to ask them in a way they understand.
Like:
"So that we may reserve seating/refreshments for all who attend please contact me at ___ with your confirmation."

or more casually:
Let me know if your coming so I can have a meal/seat/arrangements prepared

or even more casually:
"I need a head count"!

Also, make it easy for them by providing the phone number right next to the request.

Answer 7

Put in the invitation that if they do not RSVP by such and such date, that the invitation is void. If they show up, turn them away, nicely. "I'm sorry, you did not RSVP, therefore I did not think you would be here and we did not plan for extras."

Answer 8

Simply adding the 'Please RSVP by: insert date here', is the polite way to request a response. Unfortunately, not everyone is well mannered enough to follow up on your request and then your only option is to call those who haven't and confirm whether or not they're planning to come.

Answer 9

I have had that problem in the past with a couple of candle parties I threw. I always make a couple extra gifts/prizes and a little extra food.

Answer 10

Add to the invitation something like this:

"If we have not heard from you by Tuesday, April 17, we will assume that you won't be joining us."

Then if they show up anyway, you respond along the lines of "I'm so sorry; when I didn't hear from you, I assumed you weren't coming. I'm afraid that I'm not able to offer you anything."

Or maybe continue with the wording that you've been using, but when you call to follow up, leave a message like "I'm so sorry that you aren't able to come to the party. I hope you'll be able to join us next time."

Of course, I'd just forget to invite them.