I dont know what to do anymore. I really like my boyfriend a lot but I feel like I am not worth him. Like we shouldnt be together because of how popular he is. Someone please help me. I feel like I dont deserve him.
2007-02-24 22:29:27 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Darling, this is serious stuff here. Your feelings of inadequacy are depriving you of feelings of being worthwhile and needed. While common to occassionally have fleeting moments of unworthiness, this is more than fleeting, and is something you need to get to the bottom of quickly. Why do you feel so unworthy? Have you actually done something that makes you feel this way? Cheated? Lied? Or is this simply "OMG! He's so popular, and I am so NOTHING?" If the latter, then you have some issues that would be best addressed by some counseling and perhaps, a doctors visit. You may be suffering from social anxiety and or depression, neither of which should be ignored. Having a sense of self, feeling needed and wanted and special should be part of everyones "feel good" emotions on tap on a daily basis. This is more than the fleeting feeling of right before a speach for class or a test "Oh I'll never be able to do this, I didn't study enough, I should have read two more chapters, I hate talking in front of the class and get tongue tied". No this is deeper. Please, if you haven't done anything immoral to feel this way, in which guilt should be expected, then please, get a school counselor or trusted friend to talk to about this. You need to have self confidence to face the world each day and to meet people in a way that says "Its great to meet you, how fortunate for both of US to have met one another". Not just "OMG! You are SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much better than me, I deserve to be miserable because I am so WORTHLESS". One gets self confidence from knowing ones self worth is a useful and potentially life enriching experience for others. Meaning, if you greet others as a whipped dog, chances are they will obilge and treat you as such. If you greet people as a confident and engaging woman, they also will treat you accordingly. Try letting yourself know that you are worthy and worthwhile. Never let others think they are better or too good for you. Thats a bad habit to get into. Thinking you are too good for others, also, same bad idea! We are all worth knowing, and deserving of happiness. And if you have any faith in God, pray for deliverance from this doubt, as this is really an enslavement of self, my dear. You are worthy, you are special and God doesn't make mistakes. We are all here to help and care for one another. You are just as deserving as anyone also of having and keeping a nice boyfriend, his being popular doesn't put you in the undeserving realm of life, and his love doesn't make or break you. But your love of self can affect all that. I heard it once said, if we can't love ourselves wholesomely, with grace and mercy, we cannot love others, with grace and mercy. Even on a plane, they instruct Mothers to put the oxygen mask on themselves before attempting to put it on a child. A Mother who doesn't take care of herself first, will be of no use to the child when needed. So my dear, deal with your feelings of inferiority before they get the best of you, and live a full, rich and deserved life! Good luck and God bless!
2007-02-24 22:56:27 · answer #1 · answered by Tippy's Mom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off, you need to understand who you are. Do you have a good concept of the true deeper inner you? If you did you would not say this. As a christian, I say look at the bible and what God sais about you and loo at yourself through those eyes and then come back and see if you feel you are worthy of this guy. I mean, the God who created the entire universe loved YOU so much that he sent His one son, down here on earth to die even if it was just for you! You are the apple of God's eye, a daughtor of ZION! Now, I say you need to get to understand the deeper inner wealth of your own heart and soul! Is he your identity, I sure hope not. You will only find your true identity in Christ alone!. Only then will you know and understand the answer to this question.
2007-02-24 22:36:53 · answer #2 · answered by John S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Quit shooting yourself down. You have a self esteem problem? Just have fun, and don't sweat the small things. If he is popular, then that is to your advantage. If you keep acting and thinking like this, you will loose him. Be happy and enjoy your youth.
2007-02-24 22:35:25 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love yourself. Where is your self esteem? You don't think that you are worth it to him.
Pretend for a minute that you are married and have a daughter who is your age now. She says the same thing. What answer will you give to your precious child?
There you go!
2007-02-24 22:33:27 · answer #4 · answered by Tellin' U Da Truth! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
every one is popular in their own way.you are just in a different crowd now and nervous and that is fine but there is NO need to be so down on yourself you deserve as much as any one else.enjoy this time in your life,make wonderful memories to treasuse.if you will spend as much effort building up you self worth as you do bringing your self down you will be SO much happier.GO HAVE SOME FUN!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-02-24 22:41:43 · answer #5 · answered by angel_ns_texas 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you were as popular as he is and he as normal as you, would you say he does not deserve you?
Is popularity a measure to rate love?
Don´t be foolish, enjoy your life and enjoy your love. Many people would kill to get what you have and would appreciate your luck.
2007-02-24 22:43:52 · answer #6 · answered by ANOTHERCHANCE 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
We all give something away about our fears, apprehensions.
You are cutting yourself short with this " I feel I don't deserve him", nonsense!If you continue o feel this way, UNLESS he is extraordinarily astute as to your insecurities and sensitive to their existence, for whatever the reasons are - he may just begin to agree with your apprehensions : He'll also decide YOU DON"T DESRVE HIM!
2007-02-24 22:40:01 · answer #7 · answered by skydancerwi 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't feel that way. Really. I used to have the same problem, but as I got older, I realized that it wasn't true. If he likes you, he's doing so of his own free will; that should be enough to be proud of.
2007-02-24 22:34:49 · answer #8 · answered by knight2001us 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he didn't think you were worth being with he wouldn't be with you. Dont keep banging yourself up . If he is happy with you accept that and go on!
2007-02-24 22:32:32 · answer #9 · answered by happymomma3 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Popularity is as fake as the movies and television, both wont last.
But your relationship will.
2007-02-24 22:34:09 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋