I'm well into the assessment now...I will be fostering a young child (under 5) for at least 1 weekend a month to give the birth family some respite. I can cope with the medical aspects of the care, but the child may be autistic or at least have behavioural problems. Any advice would be welcome...setting and maintaining boundaries, coping mechanisms for me...calming the child and making it feel at home...dealing with the fostering process...etc. I'm pretty calm by nature and am used to dealing with difficult situations (work in critical care) but having a child is a huge responsiblity and I want to be prepared...serious answers only please.
2007-02-24 22:27:17 · 10 answers · asked by Rocket 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
Find out the nature of the behavioural problems so that you will know exactly what you are dealing with. If the child is autistic, there can be a lot of simple things that will set him off. Simply looking him in the eyes can set an autistic child screaming for hours on end until you are quite deaf and your ears are ringing. Unless you know exactly what you are dealing with, your ability to stay calm and unruffled may be severely put to the test. I am not mentioning this to discourage you, but to encourage you to be as prepared as possible. Without knowing the exact situation and how the child is interacted with in his usual environment you could be making a great deal of mistakes that might lead to many difficulties, problems and trauma for you and the child. I do not know what area you are in, but if the fostering system you are dealing with is anything like what we dealt with, it will quite often be up to you to make sure you have all the information needed to successfully take care of the child. Sticking to the child's usual routine is usually a good idea. Find out what they have for different meals, if there is a set time for these, favourite activities, is there a specific time for activities, eg no TV close to bedtime as it might hype him up, any medication the child might be on, allergies and intolerances to certain foods, any bedtime/bath time rituals, unusual words that he might use for different things, discipline and calming techniques, typical behaviour of his condition so that you know wether it is a behavioural problem you are dealing with or naughtiness, etc. If you can talk to the parents and ask them all these questions it would be great. Writing them down is also a good idea as it is very easy to forget if there is a lot of information. And good luck. It is a very trying and difficult job at times, but it is also very emotionally rewarding.
2007-02-24 23:09:17 · answer #1 · answered by Avril P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would suggest spending a little time with the child before the foster weekends start, so that he is familiar with you and won't freak out being in a weird environment all of a sudden because you being there will make it more comfortable. Like the first answerer said, try asking the parents routines, favorite foods, activities, how they deal with any fits... you want to reinforce their rules so as not to shock the child since you have him so little. Get as much info from the parents so you can provide consistent care and keep the child healthy and happy.
2007-02-24 22:37:37 · answer #2 · answered by lynn 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask his parents to send along a favorite teddy bear or toy so he has something familiar, but create a toy box of toys that stay at your house too. Things he looks forward to playing with. Try not to accomplish too much on the days he's there. Focus on him.
Create a routine like reading a story before bedtime, or building a "fort" in the living room. Try to choose your battles so you only make an issue about important things and then make sure you win. He'll get more and more comfortable and soon you both will look forward to your time together. The children in my daycare used to cry when they had to go home.
2007-02-24 22:42:38 · answer #3 · answered by Californiamama 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try and see if you can visit the home of the chidl and see what the parents do and what he is like at home.
I would like to do fostering but not now as my children are still very young. Good luck and hope it all works out well.
2007-02-24 22:44:19 · answer #4 · answered by Pinkflower 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should see if you can visit the childs home to see how his family cares for him. Keeping to a strict schedule is a good thing for children with discipline problems and keeping him in a routine is good too. Check with the family to find out all they do for him to keepthings on a steady pace for him.
2007-02-24 22:30:44 · answer #5 · answered by happymomma3 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
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2016-11-25 22:06:16 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
best option: treat him as if he were your own...
trying to treat a child as if you gave birth to him and gave him life would be the best way. never slap or shout at him, for he will just retaliate and dislie you...
dont be too worried, because your nervousness is only going to make things worse...
just relax and act as if he was your child... treat him with all the love and care that he is to be given by a real parent, and he'll show you the affection that a child would show to his biological parents...
hope this helps! :)
have a nice day! (^^)
2007-02-25 02:37:09 · answer #7 · answered by jecadear... 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
spend some time with the child beforehand, if you contact your local council there are tons of free courses you can go on to do with - autism, adhd and caring for disabled children, good luck!
2007-02-25 01:11:31 · answer #8 · answered by carolyn_4981 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No one can really advise you as you will have to use your own initiative when certain situations arise.
You sound as if you have the right frame of mind for this job...so good luck.
People like you are well appreciated in this world.
2007-02-24 22:43:19 · answer #9 · answered by Afi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you are a calm nature person, than you need not worry dear, as this the most important thing you require when you are around children's
2007-02-24 22:34:18 · answer #10 · answered by Richa 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋