For women and men who are older than 30--advice?

Question

I'm 27yrs. old and in need of some advice. I recently met a nice guy who's 39. My aunt knows him and speaks well about him. We do have a lot in common and he's a fun person to be with/around. The only problem is I've never dated anyone less than maybe 5-7yrs. older than me and I know he may look at the age difference. I really like his personality and he's an up-front type person. However, my thing is how do I mature myself up to such standards as handling an older guy? I've dealt with ones around my age and I always find something missing/no connection with guys around my age. Like I stated, I've never dated an older guy before and was wondering what advice anyone had to offer.

Also, don't mean to outlaw anyone, so this question is open to anyone/any age that may have some helpful suggestions.

Answer 1

Okay, I'm 41 and have always preferred younger women. So, I can speak from experience. You really don't have to "mature" yourself up at 27 to date a 39 year-old. At his age, if he's got at least an average amount of dating experience, it won't take long for him to figure out if there is a good connection. At 27, you're somewhat settled into your personality, habits, etc. and he definitely is.

Basically, you two will either hit it off or you won't. But you are both mature enough to be honest and straightforward with each other and well-beyond the point of playing games with each other's emotions.

Besides, 39 and 27 is really not that big of an age gap. It's the experience level that will count more than anything.

Good luck and I hope it works out...

Answer 2

It sounds like you need to try something different and that's what he is. So far the only worry you've got is that he might want you to be more mature than your chronological age. No guarantee that he thinks that way. No guarantee that you aren't already like that. And most 39 yr old guys would be happy to date a 29 yr old woman. If he asks you out then he's at least willing to see if the age difference will work. You might as well too. Give it a try.

Answer 3

There are a lot of factors --Do you have similar interests? Will you enjoy going to the same clubs, watching the same movies, etc? Do you like each other's friends and are they a variety of ages? If you want to get married some day and have kids, what is his opinion on this? Even if the two of you get along great you need to consider the bigger picture -- friends, family, etc. Like any relationship there are no guarantees, twelve years are not that many, but there may be issues that interfere.

Answer 4

first of all i don't think you have to try to be someone your not he already likes you for you. so why pretend and act another way he obviously likes what he see's and what your about. I would go out on a few dates with him and take things naturally see how he makes you feel. see how you feel around him.

You say you both have many things in common and likes and dislikes so this is a great start for sure. better than some couples who don't.

I say go for it and take it slow and see how he is. you will know if your comfortable and if it feels natural and just falls into place without forcing it.

Answer 5

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Answer 6

age is really just a number.... my grandparents were 18 years apart, kinda weird when ya really think about it, he was of graduating age when she was born.... anyways... if he likes you the way you are, dont be fake and try to advance your maturity. be yourself. dont look at it as "handling an older guy" do out on a date with him, and talk to him. find out if you actually have anything in common. without that, there really isnt much to go on unless you do put on an act and are not truely yourself.....

Answer 7

well i think this guy likes you for who you are so you don't need to change just act yourself, maybe you already act mature for your age and you just don't know it, don't change for anyone, this is what makes you - you. I'm 39 and only date guys like 10 years younger than me because i act young and older men are too mature for me lol its true, but that's just the way i am and i love me and will never change for anyone.

Answer 8

maturity doesn't come with age, it comes with experience. I've met mature young men and men in their 40s that acted like dorks who couldn't find their way around a woman if she came with a global tracking system. Just because he is 39 doesn't mean he's so mature.

Answer 9

There's no way you can pretend to be anything different than what you are......Just be you and let nature take its course...Don't worry, it's either gonna work, or it isn't . Don't start off trying to play head games like you're Miss Mature. Staying true to yourself is always the best way to go.

Answer 10

Be yourself...if he likes you/you like him...it's a go, if not, try again. It's not about age but personality. FYI, not that I think Anna was right with a 60 yr. age difference..but 10 yrs, yeah, that can work!