At my age, mid-thirties, it seems all the women I meet have already been divorced and married with children. I like children and I think I could be a good father to anyone's kids but I am intimidated by women with children who are not mine... the more the scarier! I think that after having childen of my own I would like to adopt but to start with I do not want an instant family.
2007-02-24 17:15:52 · 13 answers · asked by Don Quesadia 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well I have to say that you have the right not to date women who already have kids. Being a woman who does not have any nor want to date men with them I can see how you feel. I think when you date a woman with children you date her kids as well (I mean they are a part of her) so if you don't want to it's ok. I have dated men with kids and sometimes they get attached (to me) and it's not fare to me or that child. If you do decide to date a woman with children I think you should date for a couple of months before you meet the children, just to make sure the relationship with withstand the test of time (so to speak).
2007-02-24 17:26:17 · answer #1 · answered by belizeankiss 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm 25 and a single mother of one boy (two years old). Everyone has standards that they use when dating and I don't think that your standard makes you a jerk. I do think that by avoiding women with children that you are missing out on a lot of possibilities and you may have already passed up Mrs. Right. However you choose to deal with the situation, just remember that single moms are awesome people and deserve as much love and respect as women who don't have children. (But no, you're not a jerk)
2007-02-24 17:25:55 · answer #2 · answered by Eve 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
My better half has an 8 365 days previous little female and that i've got prevalent her considering that she replace into 5. She lives together with her mum (my companions ex spouse) and includes stay with us on common events. I had the proper same suggestions as you have at first and felt very uncomfortable saying something if she replace into doing something incorrect i got here across that this went away the extra I have been given to comprehend her. i don't think of of her lots as my newborn or maybe however i like her i comprehend that it is not comparable to how her father feels for her she nonetheless brings out my maternal instincts. If she does something undesirable then i will tell her off according to danger to not a similar diploma as her dad yet whilst she is residing under our roof she has to comprehend to admire the two person figures. i discussed my concerns with my better half and he reassured me that she needs to comprehend whilst she is doing something incorrect. teenagers prefer shape and area of this comes from being advised whats superb and whats incorrect. they could comprehend which you're somebody that they might have confidence and matter on and that they gained't benefit this from understanding that they might walk throughout you. one and all of those issues take an prolonged time yet you get there interior the tip.
2016-10-16 10:45:36 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, it doesn't make you a jerk. Dating someone with kids can be 10x as hard, because you are not only dating her, you are also dating her kids. Kids can be nightmares, especially if they are resentful about a divorce or breakup and/or if they are jealous of your relationship with their mom. There is just so much more to deal with when someone has kids.
Not to say you shouldn't give a woman with kids a chance, you may get lucky and find not only a great woman, but some great kids. If you just can't hang, then don't date women with kids and be honest with them about your reservations.
2007-02-24 17:20:41 · answer #4 · answered by Rawrrrr 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I don't think you are being a jerk. It's good that you know your limitations. I don't want children (and I am a woman) so I don't date men with children. It's about making sure you meet up with someone you will be compatible and comfortable with, and the same on her side.
2007-02-24 17:23:45 · answer #5 · answered by coffee girl 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Yes the women comes with her children. Stop being afraid. The children are not as bad as in the movies or tv.
2007-02-24 17:20:40 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
You just aren't really ready for committment in my eyes. It doesn't make you a jerk or anything, it just limits your choices.
Try to go on a couple of dates, but don't get serious with those babies mommas. Maybe you can open up to it, if you want to.
2007-02-24 17:22:07 · answer #7 · answered by Big C 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
no you are totally right not to want to get involved... it is hard to parent other peoples kids... and you have no rights in that area either
besides when you start going out and you may get attached to the kids and vice versa and you and the woman break up... it is really hard on the kids as well
you are going to have to keep looking ..she is out there.. waiting for you... go find her...Goodluck
2007-02-24 17:21:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
nope not at all. i have none myself i feel the same as you do.im late 30s was married 12 years we had no kids. i love kids and all but there is always that ex husband that the ladies with kids cant shake.
2007-02-24 17:26:40 · answer #9 · answered by wofford1257 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
No it doesn't make you a jerk. Sounds to me like you have clearly defined what is important to you......thats a good thing.
2007-02-24 17:38:07 · answer #10 · answered by Janet 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋