minor mistakes that i could easily fix. he treats my other siblings much better. when he tells my mom i've been "misbehaving", she lectures me and when i defend myself, i just get sent to my room. i've never done anything to upset him. i'm the oldest and they expect me to do everything, but its so stupid how if i mishear them or mess up he thinks i do it on puropse to upset him. if i say "sorry" he says that i did it on puropse and that i need to shut up. if i say it was an accident, he says he knows me and that i would do such a thing on purpose.
2007-02-24 16:05:34 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Sometimes the biggest problems are your parents. They feel that
u should do everything right now so you wont mess up in life.
minor accidents leads to bigger "accidents" I think opening a level
of communication you guys might get along. go to the park, jog
with each other.... family game night.... or even movies can help
you both interact more and he may see an understanding on how
you feel. But overall talk to them more..... show responsibility so
they can respect you.
I hope you find the answer you need to help.... parents can be
strict but try to live with it!!
2007-02-24 16:16:29 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Try not to get upset when you are getting lectured and defending yourself...it just ends up with an argument and you being sent away. When you are stating how you feel...don't say..."you make me feel" it puts people on the defensive...just say "I feel..." If you can't talk reasonable with them, write them a heartfelt letter. Even if they don't respond appropriately, you will feel better for writing it. Writing is very therapeutic. Or maybe do the opposite of what they expect. When he yells for a mistake made, just say..."I'm sorry....and go up and give him a kiss, and tell him you love him. Some people don't know what to say or what to think when you go against what they expect. Best of luck...and remember no one is perfect...and it's okay to make mistakes.
2007-02-25 00:19:58 · answer #2 · answered by sassy_395 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel im the oldest child i got yelled at for everything and grounded! My dad is an ex marine so it was like living in boot camp i just ignored it and proved i was the good child. My other siblings are now partiers and do things they shouldnt do so be thankful you have the discipline it might help you better when ur older! Since they were always the babies they got away with a lot and i didn't. Now look at them their lives are destroyed cuz the were pampered now my life is better!
2007-02-25 00:10:16 · answer #3 · answered by www.myspace.com/devilishvixen21 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It seems like your dad is trying to get you in trouble its not your step dad is it because my stepfather aced that way and treated his own son better. If hes your real father he must have a problem with you and your mum seems to be looking straight through it all, it also seems like he hasn't got the time for you. Are you that much older? does he expect something from you? You need to ask him these questions in front of your mum: What am I doing wrong all the time that you keep on yelling at me- what can I do to make myself better in your eyes- why don't you listen to me when I say sorry because I don't feel very happy.
If your parents love you they should listen to you and see that your hurting and not the opposite, if that doesn't help you need to go to someone to talk to them and who will listen before you become depressed.
2007-02-25 01:53:34 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like an uncomfortable situation. Knowing what I know now, I would say suggest that your family goes for family counseling so that you can get your feelings out in a protected environment. Also you can see if you are taking things personally when you could just let them slide. But everyone needs to get an understanding and express the desire to create a protected environment for each other. They have to know that you don't feel at home in your own home and give them a chance to fix it. See if they will go to at least one counseling session.
Love to ya' and hang in there.
2007-02-25 00:13:57 · answer #5 · answered by ann a 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like my dad. I'm 46, honey, and he is STILL like that with me sometimes!!! I bought the wrong brand of car battery a couple of years ago and he fussed like there was no tomorrow. It was MY car and MY money and it's just the brand wasn't the name brand he uses in his own car. Then he didn't speak to me for 2 weeks. So I'm here to tell you that that is just the way the man is and he probably won't change. However, PLEASE, don't let it get to you to the point that it ruins your self-esteem, okay? I didn't have any self-confidence til I turned 30, and I think alot of it came from being raised by a dad like this. So keep your chin up and hang in there! Everyone (even HIM) makes mistakes. Just keep telling yourself this.
2007-02-25 00:53:24 · answer #6 · answered by TPhi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your Dad yells at you because he cares. not to belittle you or anything else. If you are the oldest, then act that way. You are to set an example for your other siblings. As hard as that may seem now, you will gain respect and personal knowledge as you get older. Did I mention self esteem? Hang in there kiddo, you'll be fine.
2007-02-25 00:11:45 · answer #7 · answered by ? 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Tell someone you can trust and who understands you. Try getting help too prolly from a counselor also. If possible, reason out with your father that he needn't raise his voice at you over small things.Politely. But if he tries to hit you or shouts at you even more, you probably can lookup the child abuse organization. All the best.
2007-02-25 00:09:38 · answer #8 · answered by Clemence 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to hear that , we is parents tent to forget were young once,we promise our self no to treat our kids like our parents did ,and we actually make the mistakes over and over .
you daddy is pushing you away not in purpose ,maybe he see other kids how they act and think you are just like them.
is not easy to approach to your parents and talk .
I can tell you few things to get their attention and give more trust ,you sound like a good kid .
write a letter for him or then ,let know how you feel, and what you want from then ,believe when they see in written they will
pay attention or talk with your ant or uncle they are one of the best sources to help out and confront your parents about letting know that their kids is feeling really bad that you rather deposited your trust in your uncle ,they will feel pretty bad believe me .
good luck sweetie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-02-25 00:22:44 · answer #9 · answered by eagle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you need to sit doiwn and write dad a letter telling him who you are now. ask him what it is about you that makes him go bonkers.
tell him you can come live with me if he doesn't smarten up.
2007-02-25 00:10:55 · answer #10 · answered by peggin_beast 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋