Can you accuratly judge someones parenting skills,based on a few opinions you disagree with?

Question

I have only been a member of Yahoo Answers for about 8 months, but I have noticed how many people take parenting choices that other parents make, and determine that those choices make them a bad parent. This is something I have never come across, until I came upon Y!A. I have had other parents call me a bad mom or stepmom simply because they don't happen to agree with me on certain things. I have also seen it said to other parents. A parent says they spank their kid: their a bad parent. They leave their kid in daycare: their a bad parent. They don't get along with their stepkids: its their fault and their a bad parent. Where is it said that just because another parent doesn't share your views on parenting, that they bad parents? Or that you are better than them? There are 1000's of different views on parenting, and just because someones are not the same as yours, doesn't make them a bad parent, it simply means they don't share your views. Why do some parents think they are experts?

I don't mean the people who give advice that is not what the asker was hoping to hear or people who happen to disagree with the asker. I mean the people who take the fact that they happen to disagree with the things that another parent says, and then instead of giving helpful, even if it disagrees with the other parent, advice, they start insulting the other parent: calling them a bad parent, telling they don't deserve to have kids, calling them names, making unfair and in-accurate assumptions about them. How can it be, that just because another parent doesn't share your parenting views, that makes them an over all bad parent and you a much better parent?

Answer 1

I agree with you. Since I'm a mom, I hang out with mostly other moms, so I don't hear too much what dads say. I hear moms criticize other moms all the time. It really bothers me, because it makes me think that other moms are always judging me. I think I'm a good parent, my kids think I'm a good parent. I'm not perfect, but who is? Certainly not the other moms who constantly criticize. I think it's a power boost to them.

Answer 2

I think- for the most part- I am a really good mom/step mom but have been told that I am a bad step mom in some of the replies to my questions. I've been told that I'm the evil step mom and that I am aweful because of some of the details in my questions.

I don't take it personal. I assume that the people who tell me I am "a bad step mom" etc... had a bad step parent when they were growing up so when I ask a question about something my step daughter is getting into trouble for, I seem to be the one to blame on Y!A.

I guess people have more of a desire to tell you that they disagree with you than help you. That's how people are and that's how they will always be. They are ready to complain before there is even a problem and they thank God when something goes well in their life but never mention him when stuff goes bad. Unfortunately, you just have to get used to it.

Answer 3

i don't think anyone has the "right" to tell anyone else that they are a bad parent i
will tell someone that i don't think something they have done as a parent was something I would have done but as far as parenting

i don't think there is anyone out there that has all the answer and knows everything about the job of parenting

i think there are many out there that think they do and will try and force there style of parenting on others

yahoo answers should be a place where you can come to either verify what you are doing is a good thing or find a different way of doing some thing

when i give an answer it is a suggestion of how i think it should be handled not a demand to handle it that way

Answer 4

Well, because parenting is the most competitive 'business' in the world and others always seek to put those who disagree with them.
I think that there is no way to accurately judge someone else's parenting styles, but if there were, it wouldn't be from a few sentences that someone writes in a question on ONE day that may have been particularly stressful for them.

Answer 5

I am not sure what gives them that right to judge in their minds but its not true at all there are many ways to parent children thats why there are many kinds of parents and kids. I wouldn't take it to heart just let it roll off your back a bad parent is one that doesnt care about their kids at all and just plain ignores them and i doubt this is the case of anyone asking a question in the parenting section. =)

Answer 6

no matter what the situation is ppl will always judge...we all do it..most ppl just do it out loud not thinking...although sometimes its hard to do i believe the best thing is to think before u speak. always be considerate of other ppls feelings...but for ppl who cant do that..i guess we just gotta look over them..cause there isnt anything we can do. feelings get hurt everyday