i just need some advice on this. okay well ive been with my boyfriend for 14 months and i love him very much. but this week has been completely horrible, we've been fighting for no reason and i feel like im falling out of love with him. he seems distant and we just dont get along very well anymore. but were trying to work things out somehow, like taking breaks from one another and things like that.
heres the part im confused about.. theres this guy, who im starting to really enjoy being around, and we've been talking a lot lately, and he told me he could see himself really liking me. after me and my boyfriend fight, ive been going to this guy and just talking to him and he makes me forget all about the bad stuff. but today he told me he's scared of falling for another girl. and i know im scared to leave my boyfriend of a year for this guy when im not even sure of where its going.
i would really appreciate opinions on this situation.
2007-02-24 06:05:00 · 7 answers · asked by kayyyy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It sounds like you're the one doing all the work in the friendship with the new guy. You don't know if you'll be in a relationship with him even if you leave your bf. Meanwhile, guy #2 gets to "triangulate" your relationships causing confusion. I would stay with the bf, if only to figure out... ALONE... what to do about him. Then see the New Guy if you're free.
2007-02-24 06:12:06 · answer #1 · answered by emilsignia 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, complicated...what is it that makes you run to another man when things go wrong with your b/f? That's not good coping, to say the least. Of course another guy will seem to have less faults than your current b/f. That's b/c people tend to have an overly-sunny disposition toward a new person of affection for around the first 3 months. After the newness wears off, their faults begin to rear their ugly heads. Things that you ignored at first for the sake of this 'fabulous person' begin to really bother you. The point I'm trying to make is that you and your b/f are past the honeymoon stage. This new guy may be representing the 'grass is greener' theory. He's new, he's exciting, and boy is he cute! If you and b/f can work things out, then by all means, work them out. It's held together for this long. Unless there are some deep-seeded problems or triggers that are unbearable for you, cut your losses. The most important thing you can do is look solely at the situation between you and b/f--leave this other guy out of it completely. You probably need to cut off communications COMPLETELY with the other guy if you truely want things to get resolved. Good luck
2007-02-24 06:14:37 · answer #2 · answered by Lissa_kay 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
umm wow thats a big one ok you should go out with the one that makes you feel good. you should never stay in a relationship if you arent happy. I guess time with you and ur 1 year boyfriend are over. i mean if you still wanna stay with him then thats cool. give him another week to see what happenes. if yall continue to fight then its pointless. if yall dont fight then its all up to you! as for the other guy i really think you should go out with him
2007-02-24 06:15:08 · answer #3 · answered by Pookie! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my girlfriend and i went out for a year and 2 months, just like you. starting in august 06 and getting to the bitter end in early november.
i'm not going to lie, it was just about the hardest thing i ever went through and i thought i would never stop feeling bad about it. I dont know about you, but i hate when people use the term "getting over it" because its not that easy. I can honestly say i loved her, but in the end we both realized we needed to call it quits, our parents wouldnt even allow us to see each other anymore. we ended for good on this past valentines day and she said "call me before college."
i'm never gonna forget her, but the best you can do now, is talk to him about putting it on hold/breaking up. I'm having fun being single now, and once you get out into the real world you'll learn something about yourself and realize how much you can do on your own. its a life experience that everyone goes through. holding on to a relationship is a hard thing to do when its breaking apart, but letting go is even harder.
you just need to find it in yourself to be strong and have faith that everything will work out because I can say from past experience that everything happens for a reason.
i hope that helped.
2007-02-24 06:16:05 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it sounds like to me, that you are kind of falling for this guy mostly because things are crappy between you and your guy. thats normal. although you do like the guy, it majorly intinsifies because you and the other guy are in a rut.
if i were you, i would take a few steps back, and take some time off by yourself to think. cause, if you left your current for him, it could be a descion you would seriously regret. and, most of the time thats like one of those unforgivable ones with guys. injure thier manhood, and they run with thier tails between thier legs so to speak.
i hope the best, and make sure you think it through bigtime before making any descions.
good luck
2007-02-24 06:10:45 · answer #5 · answered by midnyghtcloud 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My advice would to be to talk with your boyfriend and see if you can stay with him a little while longer even if it doesn't work out, so you can get to know your friend. That way you don't end up with nothing.
2007-02-24 06:11:22 · answer #6 · answered by Hodie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lots of oral would be a good beginning. Your b/f will finish.
2007-02-24 06:09:37 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋