Why has he gone silent?

Question

My boyfriend has been stressed out with his job lately. He asked me to give him some space to sort his situation out. He explained to me that he does not feel well at his job right now and he needs to look for a new one but he needs to focus. The thing is I have become needy of him, telling him that I don't feel special and we are loosing each other. We should meet 2 weeks later. Yesterday evening I sent him a message again telling him about our relationship, he said he honestly does not have the energy to deal with this right now and now he is upset. What should I do? Should I text him and tell him I am sorry or should I leave him alone? Why is he silent now?

Answer 1

I think he is bored.
It could be the presence of someone else.
It could be bad autoconfidence.

Get away for a while from him; let him feel how is it without you. Wait a while, be patient.
If he reacts positively, give him a chance.

Answer 2

Give him the Space he asked for. He willl call you when he's ready. I guess with the pressure from work and having to look for another job..if he has bills etc he needs to pay....and then YOU start saying YOU don't feel special anymore and how you may lose each other. That's the last thing he wants to hear! or focus on ...He's going through quite an ordeal right now..he asked for you to back off some and give him space...YOU NEED TO STOP being sooo NEEDY or trust me.......You'll be very Alone* he'll walk out the door and not look back. You SHOULD have been supporting him , allowing him to vent his frustrations and fears...instead of talking about how YOUR Feeling*(insecure*) The best thing you can do right now...IS not text him that your sorry...JUST LEAVE HIM ALONE to sort through this, and think about HOW you can have a better relationship with him once this is said and done.(if you have a relationship still or not)????? COMMUNICATION - TRUST - and HONESTY are the keys to a long lasting healthy relationship as well as RESPECT* (start showing him some and give him the time he needs*) GOodLUCK

Answer 3

This is actually a good thing for him to be doing. If you continue your relationship to marriage, this means he is very concerned about finances and providing an income. Don't be hounding him about your relationship. He's got too much on his plate right now with work and he needs you to be silently understanding. The best thing you can do is STOP texting him...send him an "I understand and will be here when you need me" kind of card. Let him make the first call or text message. That way you know he's ready. Until then, send him a card now and then (no more than one a week) to let him know you care about him but you're giving him the space he needs. He'll appreciate you for it.

Blessings

Answer 4

Leave him alone. You are pestering him and he is deeply concerned about his own future and does not need your neediness to kick in right now. You also dont have to apologize. If he is as stressed as you say, he is probably also wondering if his relationship with you is any good or not. When a person is deeply stressed and wants space, it is best to allow that space. When a person's life is rotten in a critical area, like a job, they dont need to hear that the rest of the things in their lives are falling aprt too. Right now be supportive but let him call you.

Answer 5

Gosh, girl. He has asked you to LEAVE HIM ALONE. So why are you texting him? And why would you text him to say you're sorry when he asked you not to bother him????? You sound very insensitive.
You also sound terribly needy. Go find your friends and do some interesting things with them. Find other interests for yourself. Guys aren't like girls; they don't need to talk and talk and talk when they have a problem. They need to focus and solve that problem. They like a partner who can understand that and who can put her own needs on the back burner for a few days while things work out. You don't sound like the kind of partner he needs.
Get over yourself and put him first for awhile. But don't be surprised if this is his way of telling you that he wants a lot more space. Go find your own life.

Answer 6

Oh dear leave him the hell alone I know you cannot see it right now but he is trying to get rid of you. For what reason you may never know except maybe it is like you said you are needy and he hates it. Give him some space and see if he comes back. Just dont sit around and pine away over him show him you are still going to go on with your life wether he is in it or not. If you dont he will think he has control over you.

Answer 7

He already has enough to deal with at work. Now he comes home and has to deal with a nagging wife and how she is so incredibly needy and has to be clingy to be able to feel close. You should give him the distance he needs or he will leave you. I know because I was in the same situation 6 months ago. Divorce will be finalized on Tuesday.

Answer 8

If it's true that he's stressed out with work, don't add to the pressure. You'll just drive him away from you. Just show your support by texting him regularly, telling him that you'll always be there if he needs you.

On the other hand, if you feel that the stress out thing is just an alibi, Go dump him right away. He may be looking for the easiest way to get out of the relationship. Or if you really love him, you may try to talk to him and iron out the problem.

Answer 9

Hmmm, he already told you his problem. Leave the man alone and let him get his stuff together. If you give him time, I'm sure when he's done getting it together, he'll appreciate your patience and want to be with you more.

Answer 10

Respect his wishes!! leave the poor guy alone! honor what he says and when he feels he is ready to contact you, he will.
You will push him further away if you keep pestering him.