ok so last monday (my gf was supposed to go out with one of her "guy" friends to drink) that didnt end up happening so she went to his house wednesday (which I had no idea about, heard abt it from a close friend) then I ask her to reassure me that I am the one she loves and she does that. I ask her if she has time to see me on saturday and sunday (and she says she cant she already has plans on both days!!!).
I want to approach her about this because although she says she loves me (how can she not find a little time to c me!!!)But i dont want to seem really harsh about it because I know if I ruffle any feathers we will b mad at each other for a while and I dont want that I love this girl!!.
Any suggestions how I can bring this up in a way that wont ruffle any feathers...
2007-02-24 00:34:05 · 14 answers · asked by vincy015 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If she is really your girlfriend, you should have the right to ask her directly. Make sure you don't make it an accusation or believe she is guilty before she answers. If you can't trust her, she shouldn't be your girlfriend.
2007-02-24 00:37:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly I don't thing she's being honest w/ you. If she's your girlfirend and you are in love w/ each other why wouldn't she make plans that you both can be a part of. When I was dating my husband we hung with the same people, we went out together on the weekends except for the girls/guys night outings but I never went to another man's house w/o him. I just don't see that as a respectable action when your in a relationship. I have guy friends but there isn't ever a reason for me to be at there home at night w/o my boyfriend/husband knowing... I think you need to take a long look at this relationship and where it's going. Sometimes when you love someone you have to let them go if it's meant to be they'll be back... Good luck!
2007-02-24 00:42:40 · answer #2 · answered by prissymama 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends...how long have you been going out? How many times has she not made time for you?
If the answers are "a while" and "often", then bring it up in caring way out of genuine concern that perhaps, she's not finding something within the relationship that you think you can provide if given the opportunity.
If the answers are "not long" and "rarely", then I would hold off. Perhaps she's just asserting her independence, you know, "I have my own life too", so it's nothing to worry about yet.
What ever you do...don't try to control the situation or her...it will backfire in the worst way.
2007-02-24 00:38:04 · answer #3 · answered by NYGirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Was it just the two of them out drinking?
Her not telling you that she is going to his house is a bad sign, in my opinion. I have seen girls do this and in the end, all of them ended up cheating on their boyfriends. Is there a reason why you can't go with her when she hangs out with him?
My girlfriend wouldn't go to any guys house without me. She definitely wouldn't go drinking with someone else. It's not because I'm a jealous guy or controlling. It's a respect thing, she wouldn't want me to do that either and I wouldn't. I'm sure we all know what could happen... especially if there is alcohol involved.
My advice is to talk to her about it. Don't beat around the bush and just tell her how you feel. If you don't like it, tell her that and tell her why. If you are uncomfortable about her seeing that other guy when you aren't around, tell her that too. If she love and respects you, she will listen.
If she puts the other guy before you, you may want to consider other options...
2007-02-24 00:59:24 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say spy on her to see if shes cheatin with the drinkin buddy, sounds to me like she has started losing interest in the relationship,, and remember your a guy,, a woman looks at you just right and bats there eyes a few times and tells us exactly what we want to hear, gives you a few soft kisses and we are putty in their hands, and you think she loves only you,, I would pay attention to everything the next week or 2 and see what sort of game if she is playing, The thing of her going to another guys house,, what if you would have went to a female friends house and didnt tell her,, she would be all over you like white on rice, screaming and demanding to know what the heck went on,, did you have fun gettin laid,, etc. etc. Put your back brace on,, no piece of tail is worth your self respect, stand up for yourself
2007-02-24 00:54:30 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
man, you a rest haven for miss treatment. It OK to love as long as it reciprocated. Focus you time and energy in other places or on some other female, She will come running, look at how you reacting to her and her so called friend. It wouldn't be me, there is a way to check and balance every relationship and still respect each other space. If not move on to a situation that is more fruitful.
2007-02-24 00:54:28 · answer #6 · answered by TBONE 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The question has been asked and answered and the issue has passed. There is no way to bring this back up without a fight. Why is it that you do not trust the girl? What is your problem? Why are you so insecure? If you need to know go ahead and ask but expect her to get angry and that will be your fault. If you do not trust her why are you with her and if you do trust her why are you stressing over this? check yourself man I think you got some issues
2007-02-24 00:40:42 · answer #7 · answered by CindyLu 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No good way sounds to me like she is breaking a trust try discussing with her what is going on and that you are having problems with her spending time with this guy, communication is key, she has some options here and all you need to do is listen to what she has to say. Chances are she will probably get uncomfortable in which case u really need to move on, otherwise listen to what she has to say. Girls are very easy to talk to when you let them know u are uncomfortable with something
2007-02-24 00:39:50 · answer #8 · answered by Diz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a strong suggestion would be to find a way to dis-associate yourself from this female, shes playing both ends against the middle and her romantic intentions are less that stable or honorable, in the end, you will be hurt if you stay with her for any lenght of time. good luck, there are more fish in the pond
2007-02-24 00:40:26 · answer #9 · answered by robert r 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds as though you are more committed to a relationship than she is. She may be your girlfriend but you are obviously not her boyfriend. Ruffle the feathers.
2007-02-24 00:41:23 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Frankly, you sound a little bit smothering and like you don't trust her. And I think she's reacting to that by not wanting to be near you.
I suggest sitting down with her and admitting you've been a little needy. Then discuss whether you two should be together or not.
2007-02-24 00:37:30 · answer #11 · answered by Aimee L 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋