I just confessed to my husband that my dad molested me. I have a void in my heart and I am wonderin if I did the right thing. This happened 12 years ago and the only one that knew was my Mom but she didnt do anything, and now my husband confronted him about it and my dad denied it, The confrontation between my husband and my dad was short and direct. I feel like my family is divided and like I didnt do the right thing
2007-01-15 20:55:14 · 12 answers · asked by Justme 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
First off, u DID the right thing, This is going o make your relationship with your husband better. I strongly believe that when you talk to your spouse about urself, things work out for the bestm unless you have a bad husband. In your case, he stood up for you and did something you didnt want to,,... which is 100% understandable. He confronted him and ur mom probably did too but when a woman confronts a man, it seems a little ackward, so your husband acted like a man. 12 Years ago? And your dad still has the problem, not you.. You will be divided but u should be,.... things like this u cant forget
2007-01-15 21:15:22 · answer #1 · answered by Photographer 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are the one who should have confronted your father years ago. If he is denying it and not getting help, then why do you have a relationship with him at all?? Your mom basically betrayed you in favor of her relationship with your dad. Yikes, I would have confronted her too. I'd ditch them both anyway to show them that what they did was wrong. At least until they apologized or got some serious therapy. I mean, what if you have kids? Would you bring them to a molester grandpa?? I didn't know my husbands father was a molester until it was too late. If I had known, I would have NEVER visited either one of them. My son paid the price and now he's a drug addict. He's recovering but it's taken over ten years. My advice to you is to steer clear from your family. They have some major problems. I would even go so far as to report your father. What if he's currently molesting some other poor girl? Can you have that on your concious?
2007-01-15 22:13:51 · answer #2 · answered by Marissa M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing. It may be hard for your husband to be around your father now knowing what he has done to you. So try not to be to hard on your husband for that. Keeping it a secret would have destroyed you in the long run. Your family was already divided when your father did that to you and your mother took no action against him for his behavior. I feel the best thing you could do is to try to get some profesional help dealing with what your father has done to you along with your husband on how the two of you can cope and move on with your lives now since it is all out on the table. I wish you all the best.
2007-01-15 21:56:16 · answer #3 · answered by Ginny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you did the right thing by telling your husband. your dads denial and your moms lack of action show what type of people are, its probably best to distance yourself from these people or at least your dad, if you and your mom have a good relationship and leave it at that. other then your husband slugging your dad there isn't much of a relationship that is going to build from that. dont' worry about feeling like your family is divided it already was with the secret you and your mom held.
2007-01-15 21:04:03 · answer #4 · answered by athena9980 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing. Your husband took it personally as he should of. You're his wife and he wasn't afraid to confront your father for what he did. Your mother should of done what your husband did and booted your father out.
2007-01-16 00:05:32 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband is probably just angry about that and couldn't help but confront your father. You didn't do anything wrong, talking about things is the best way to cope and heal.
2007-01-15 20:59:46 · answer #6 · answered by good things last 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing, you should tell your husband...Your mom knows it was wrong and she should have done something...Your husband is now your family and he stood up for you, sounds like a good man....
2007-01-15 21:03:11 · answer #7 · answered by ABBYsMom 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Well your husband seems to care but he should of asked you if it was ok first I think. Its possible if you and your dad was up to it going to thearpy about it. I mean if it did come up maybe deep down it still hurts and bugs you.
2007-01-15 22:52:48 · answer #8 · answered by bluebutterflyfarie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing...I am sure he was thinking about his family now/when he has one...he does not want to leave his kids alone with that man.
2007-01-15 21:23:11 · answer #9 · answered by jeeccentricx2 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your mom needs her @ss kicked for 12 years now.
2007-01-16 00:57:25 · answer #10 · answered by DASH 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋