He doesn't want to have rival on my love and attention.I could say we are old enough i am 31 yrs. old and both stable.what should i do to convince him?
2007-01-15 16:52:25 · 10 answers · asked by shel 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
Wow. "Rival for love and attention??? Is he a MAN or a boy. This really should have been discused before you were married. Now you have to consider if this is OK with you to be with him or move on.
2007-01-15 17:59:41 · answer #1 · answered by Kandy 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You can't convince somene to be a parent. If you trick him and do it anyway, you will ultimately resent him for his lack of interest and involvement and he will resent you for sharing your affections and time with this screaming, smelly kid that keeps him up all night crying.
Kids put stress on marriages like you can not imagine! This is true when both people really want a child. I cannot even imagine how much worse it would be if it was one sided.
To be blunt, get counseling and either come to an agreement that neither of you will regret later or get a divorce. If he becomes a parent reluctantly, you'll end up that way anyway.
2007-01-15 16:59:43 · answer #2 · answered by Army family. 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I doubt you will every convince him. It sounds like your relationship has some deeper issue to consider than this. If you really want a child and don't have one because of him, you will never ever forgive him, or yourself. If he is so insecure about your relationship he can't bear the thought of sharing you.........well he clearly has issues. I'd strongly recommend counselling because these problems will not go away, they will only get worse and in 10 years time it might be too late for you to have a child, how will you feel then?
2007-01-15 21:26:03 · answer #3 · answered by gerrifriend 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is something the two of you should have talked about BEFORE you got married. You should not do anything to try and convince him, he has the right to NOT be a father if he chooses NOT to be a father. Having a child when one partner doesn't want to be a parent isn't going to do anything to help the marriage...in fact it could be the end of it.
2007-01-15 18:01:15 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should have discussed having children before you got married, if he never intended on having children and you wanted children then that would be a conflict. You can only tell him how you feel but you have to respect him if he chooses not to have children unless he told you he wanted children in the past.
2007-01-15 16:58:18 · answer #5 · answered by Sakora 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
im not realy sure what to tell you. I know it hurts ive been there. just give him some time to let the idea grow in his small head(lol) and bring it up often and see if his mind changes.
2007-01-15 16:58:57 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make it clear to him how much you want to have a baby. Also make it clear that you will still have alone time with him...a baby could make you two become even closer. :)
2007-01-18 11:17:53 · answer #7 · answered by em<3 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you could just stop taking your birth control... lol just kidding. try talking to him about it more, voice your desires and wants, and see what his concerns are. try not to be judgemental or gloss over his concerns. you could also try going to a counselor. best of luck.
2007-01-15 16:57:50 · answer #8 · answered by sinaka23 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow.
why wouldnt you want an offspring?!?
it's a symbol of your marriage and love.
your creation and life.
he should embrace it.
if not then seriously stop taking the BC and suprise himm!!
or well lastly... divorce...
arr, that's not fun
2007-01-15 16:59:24 · answer #9 · answered by heyhhc 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
you guys really should have discussed this before you got married.
2007-01-15 16:57:13 · answer #10 · answered by a heart so big 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋