My in-laws always upset me they are always rude, blut with me and not respect me at all but now I have a problem with my 8 year old baby I am simply concerned about her heath and if I see something that my husband's family is not doing right with my baby and that effects baby's health (since she is not suppose to take all kind of outside food because she is too young for all this)but they try to give her and if you say something they won't listen you. I had spoken with my husband and we had argued about it because he doesn't see anything wrong(eventhough baby's doc.said that it will effect baby's health) with that and he will never say anything to them because they are his family (he said that to me because for him his family comes firs tthan baby's health) then I though may be counselor can help us but he does not want to go there(I don't know why) I am very upset with this please advice me. thanks..
2007-01-15 16:46:40 · 8 answers · asked by hondolkk 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Well, I would go to counseling even if he won't go. Maybe you can get some advise on how to effectively deal with the situation and a councilor may be able to help you find a way to talk to your husband in order to get him to go to counseling with you.
You will just have to stand firm about your in-laws interfering with your baby and the way that you are raising it. I am assuming that you made a typo back there and he is 8 months old and not 8 years old.
It may help to ask you doctor for some literature on infant nutrition and produce this when your in-law attempt to feed the baby food.
Hang there... I don't envy you. I have been there!
2007-01-15 16:57:13 · answer #1 · answered by flappymcp 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really do need some counseling for assistance. I think it's terrible how often one spouse wants help and the other doesn't want anything to change. A counselor will be able to help you sort out what valid concerns are and set appropriate boundaries with the in laws. Alot of families - like my own in laws - act like they are still an immediate family and you're just an offshoot of whatever it is that they are and you have no choice in wanting to be different from what you were growing up in any way. This is ridiculous - your family is you and your hubby - what you are is different in many ways from your own family and your in laws family. They need to accept that and your husband needs to draw appropriate boundaries and consider your feelings and needs as mother above theirs - afterall you're not just another one of their children - you're the WIFE and MOTHER - even though the in laws don't treat you that way.
2007-01-16 00:53:50 · answer #2 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Huh? An 8 year old is NOT too young to eat what his family gives her as long as it's healthy food.
Or. do you mean an 8 MONTH old? Put that child on formula, and maybe baby cereal and baby fruits. Period. Do NOT let his family feed her anything else.
You DON'T have to let them. Aren't you right there at meal time?
If they won't listen, take the baby and go away. You're the Mom, you have that right.
2007-01-16 01:08:44 · answer #3 · answered by kiwi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u should make it clear to ur husband that u are married to him and not his family. insist that he should mke it sure that no one from his family feeds ur baby what is not good for her. u cant take risks. calmly but firmly, u can tell ur inlaws not to feed ur baby any unhealthy food. next time u go to a doctor, ask ur husband to accomany you. with him by your side, u can talk to ur doctor abt baby's food. perhaps that will convince him. if he is a person who puts his family ahead of his own kid's health, then u r supposed to take the lead. make it clear to him that as long as he is not interested in his baby's health, he has no voice in taking decisions regarding her health or whatever.tell him that u r not asking him to choose between ur abay and u and his family, but just asking him to have some more consideration for his own family- u, ur child. if he refuses to see a counsellor, atleast you can attend the session, it will give you an idea how to proceed abt the whole thing. meanwhile ask ur doctor, what type of outside food is ok for ur ababy, now that she is 8 months(or years?u didnt make that clear) old. All the best
2007-01-16 01:10:37 · answer #4 · answered by lilac4u 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your baby is 8 months old it's time to introduce food. Trust me, I've got 5 years in a infant day care and three children of my own. Food is introduced at around 6 months old. The only thing that will hurt your baby are high allergen foods. Instead of fighting about everything, try just fighting about certain foods. Choose your battles. Since I don't know what every high allergen food is I'll just tell you to look up feeding babies on the net. I waited to introduce foods to my first kid till he was 12 months. He's the only one of my kids who won't eat. I think I waited too long.
2007-01-16 00:57:00 · answer #5 · answered by Tasha 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I agree that you should see a counselor even if your husband won't go. This issue of him not standing up to his family is going to persist in your marriage and will likely be an ongoing problem unless you deal with it. Good luck.
2007-01-16 01:13:08 · answer #6 · answered by goodfreeadvice 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
time to shake the sugar tree
2007-01-16 00:56:25 · answer #7 · answered by Kim D 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This, too will pass.
2007-01-16 00:53:21 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋