Please help. My family is prejudice and I want to date interracially.?

Question

I am a 22yr old white male. I am graduating college in May with my degree in Psych. I am cool with everyone at school and probably have more black friends than white friends (but I really don't see "race" like everyone else does, I just see people). The thing is that I want to be able to date whoever I LIKE (whether it be white, black, latino, asian, etc) and I know that I will face huge problems at home bc my family is really close minded. I really, really have wanted to date black girls since I was like 15 (and that is what I am really, really attracted to) but my family has issues with being prejudice. For example, they think that all of the black people on welfare are lazy and are crackheads and stealing money by being on fed. assistance. They kinda feel the same about latinos too. They think that if you are a minority you are getting over unless you are working class(middle to higher middle/upper class). What should I do? I wanna be able to date whoever I LIKE NO MATTER THE RACE

Answer 1

Hunny, your a grown man, it shouldnt really matter what your family thinks or says abt you, you should be able to date whomever you want, if they dont like it tough, its your life not theirs. Good luck!

Answer 2

Its werid how much of this **** is out there. For 1 eveyone is so mixed race any more how can we be predjuice against anyone? My mother is a mexican but my dad was racist against blacks? How does that make sense.. I use to ask him dad im mexican do you love me any less he would say no but still said i was not to date a black man. Well as I got older the first guy i met was black. To me it never mattered color. I love people in general. So my first bf was black and later we got engaged my family was enraged BUT true family will love you no matter what. My dad eventaully changed his mind and my mom never really cared shes stilll a little close minded and my siblings were always openminded. AS for Aunts and uncles cousins i dont have any of that family left because i would not change what i thought was right. I could care less. I feel racisim is ignorance and i frankly dont need stupid people in my life. Racism goes both ways though keep that in mind. I have dated black men that their family has had problems with me. I also dated a white man that his family hated that i am half mexican. It hurts to be judge on the color of your skin so make sure anyone you date. Understand your belifes and your familys ignorance. So that they will not be surprised later! BEst of luck

Answer 3

Step back and analyze your own motives. You say, "I really don't see "race" like everyone else does, I just see people," and you sound very moral and high-minded. But then you say, "I really, really have wanted to date black girls since I was like 15." Not a specific black girl, but just any black girl.

I want to suggest that all you are doing is rebelling against your racially prejudiced family, but you are treating black people as a group just as much as your family. Racial prejudice is treating other people as a group and not as persons and it's not good whether you want to throw rocks at them or take them to Starbucks for coffee. In either case, you reduce the PERSON to being just a member of a group.

Your family thinks all blacks are on welfare and lazy. You think that all black girls are desirable and attractive. There's not as much distance between you and your family as you wish.

Answer 4

what they dont know will hurt them.. that's your family's problem or fear. if they know someone of a different race or culture and have a relationship, then they will base their opinion on their own experience or what the media portrays. it's narrow and shameful actually. there are few people who will rise above such things and treat all humans kindly even in adversity. some think as you do but are cowards and prefer not to deal with anything that will cause others to respond negatively or shut them out...or just cant handle it. you do whatever brings peace to you.

Answer 5

Date one and see what they say :x If you're away at college they won't know her race until they meet her right? Mwahaha...

Answer 6

This is your family and I know you love them to death. But look at it like this no matter who you go out with they are not gonna approve of anyone. WhY? Cause they don't want to see you happy at all. This is one question you will have to answer yourself. You either go out with someone they like and you don't like or you follow your heart and no matter what make yourself happy in the process. We can not all ways please everyone in the family if we try to please everyone our own life will be miserable and unhappy cause we are all ways thinking about others before ourselves. I know they do things that you don't approve of but do they listen to you or do they do what will make them happy? Do what will make you happy cause you are the one that will have to make yourself happy right now they are only thinking of themselves and not you. I say follow your heart and your feelings no matter what just be ready for your family to start to act funny towards you but hey you will be happy doing what you like. No one can live your life for you. you have to make your own decisions in life and that is something you will have to deal with not them, you will later regret not doing what you wanted to do cause of what others are thinking. Be yourself and do what you like. Many people miss out on a lot of things in life. Why? Cause they are all ways thinking about what others are going to say. One day everyone of us will be in HEAVEN and not here on earth anymore, in our graves and at least you can go to yours knowing that you did what made you happy and not what others chose for you. FOLLOW YOUR HEART!!!

Answer 7

If you are ready to give up your family then you are free to date
anyone you wish.