I'm a bad mother for asking my 3yo to clean her own room once a week?

Question

Basically just to put toys away and pick up her crayons, of course I will help her but I want her to learn some responsibilty. I will vacuum it myeslf I wont let her go near the vacuum.

Answer 1

No, the sooner she learns responsibility the better.

Answer 2

It's good that you're teaching her about keeping things neat. But cleaning a whole room is a lot for a 3-year-old to do by themselves -- depending on how bad the room is. It can seem overwhelming to them.

I'd recommend telling her to pick up 20 things and put them where they belong -- once a day if necessary,. Or help her clean the room and make it fun -- put on a timer and make a game of it to do a 5-minute room rescue or a 15-minute room rescue if it's really bad. Stop when the timer dings.

Don't make it into an endless slog that she has to do on her own, tears and all. That's just demoralizing.

Check out flylady.net for good ideas (not necessarily the same as mine). Best wishes to you.

Answer 3

Why would you think suck a thing? My son is 4 but I've been having him pick up his room or at least help me pick up his room from the time he could walk. You have to start instilling some sort of proper behavior as such when they're young, otherwise good luck trying to get them to do anything in the future. I do make it easy for him. I just have one big trunk in his room that he throws all his toys in. Having them seperate their legos or puzzle pieces is probably a little too much for that age. Come 6 though, they better be able to know the difference. I just keep the legos and puzzles out of his room and when he wants to play with them I take it of the refridge for him. It goes right back up when he's done. Good luck.

Answer 4

If your asking this question then you all ready feel that you are making the wrong decision here.

A three year old is old enough to pick up her toys with mommy's help and put them in the toy box.
A three year old IS NOT old enough to take on the responsibility of cleaning her room.

Use some common sense here ! She is still a toddler !
Ask your parents how you were when you were 3 ...Bet you weren't doing the housework.

Answer 5

As long as you're patient with her. If you're standing over her or yelling at her if she doesn't do a good job, then yes you're being a bad mother. A child needs to learn how to clean but a 3 year old isn't capable of doing that much. Picking up toys and putting them in a toy chest, putting clothes in a hamper and pulling up the covers is about all you should expect. If she's done that you should be quite satisfied.

Answer 6

It depends on your expectations of "CLEAN" Do you want the floors mopped and the ceiling painted or are you asking her to clean up clutter and put things back where they belong? If it is the latter of the two than absolutely not. She is totally old enough to pick up things she more than likely got out. You have to have reasonable expectations for the "cleaning" though. Remember it was done by a 3 year old, so it wont look like you did it yourself. I ask my daughter to help me w/ chores on a regular basis and it tends to go better when we work like a team she is 3 &1/2. She really enjoys doing certain things and other things like cleaning her room she cant stand. But I feel if she is big enough to get all of the stuff out she can at least help me to put it away, or put simple things away herself.

Answer 7

You would be a bad mother if you did NOT aske her to do this. You also need to help her and model how to do it. That is a HUGE job of organizing for a small child. Better to do it for 5 minutes a day. Kids that age cannot sort and classify so many objects without help - this is a math skill - you can start teaching it, but don't expect miracles. If she doesn't want to do it she is likely more frustrated and confused than defiant. Try 5 minutes a day, and help her learn to do it.

Answer 8

Don't worry about what the other people say. Obviously they didn't read the DETAILS where you said you don't make her vaccuum and you just ask her to pick up her toys and crayons. I think that this is a very good thing to teach her some responsiblity otherwise she's going to grow up pampered and expecting everyone to do everything for her and she won't be ready for the real world when she is grown. Kudos to you!!

Answer 9

No, you are not a bad mother. Sounds like you are a great one. There is nothing wrong with teaching your young child to be responsible by giving him/her simple chores. You may also want to give her a small reward for extra chores like helping you wash the car or clean out a closet. You could get her a piggy bank and give her coins for chores. Every so often take her to the store to buy a toy with her very own money. I do this with my 3 year old boy and he loves it!

Answer 10

No your child needs to learn some responsibility, but as a suggestion maybe make a clean up time everyday not just once a week, that way it wont be so overwhelming for your 3yo

Answer 11

You are asking a 3 year old to clean their room once a week?? Are you crazy??LOL. You are not a bad mother, not at all. I think you just have your expectations a little messed up. You can get your 3yo to pick up toys, and to "help" clean. Yes. but to do it themselves?? I don't think so. Usually at that age, you can get them to start to "help" in short time limits around the house. Their attention span just isn't there enough to clean an entire room by themselves. If they could do that, they could pick out their own clothes, and go to school. Lighten up a little. Talk to your pediatrician about what you can expect from your particular child. They are a wealth of information:)