Are there some guys who can get with practically any woman they want?

Question

And if so, how do they fair with women who are in relationships?

If they exist, I may work with one. He’s33, 6’1”, in decent shape, and something of a player. I know he’s had his way with a good number of women, but he brags a little bit too much. He said he gauged from her body language at a Christmas party that he could score my gf if he tried. I almost decked him, but I told him – you don’t know her if that’s what you think.

Foolishly, its turned into a wager. And the stakes aren’t low: he’s going to give me all of his billable hours for a case we’re working on (we’re both associates at a civil defense law firm, and billable hours are of incredible value.) one way or the other with my end of the wager being fulfilled if I have the guts not step in the way and let him do what he has to. If I block her, or if I refuse to allow it to be confirmed (ie I’ll let him ask my gf at the next function in a way that doesn’t reveal the wager), I have to give him my billables. Our billable are due at the end of the month, so that put a pretty good time limit on things.

On Jan 12 there was a bar association function, and he fairly openly flirted with my wife. He even asked to dance with her. I didn’t step in, and they danced a little, but at the end of the night she came home with me. I called him, and said guese your game is over – and he said, not necessarily. Give him until this Saturday morning, and if he hasn’t gotten anything by Friday night, he’ll throw in the towel. But don’t count on it.

Then, out of nowhere, my gf says that she is going out on Friday with her one friend. She goes out with her friends once or twice a month, so that she’s going out is no big deal – but why just this one this time? And the timing!!!!!!!!!!!!

I’m worried, but I guesse I brought this on myself. I still trust her. But still – what are the odds?

Answer 1

There are a number of possibilities, but let's deal with what we know. If she knows nothing of the wager and she hooks up with this guy, I'm not sure you have very much blame at all. Did this guy know she was your wife/gf before he made the initial comment? If so, then you're complicit in whatever happens. If he didn't, who's to say he wouldn't have pursued and gotten her, anyway, sans bet? And in the final analysis, your mate holds the brunt of the blame. It doesn't say much about her character to jump the bones of someone right off the bat, no matter how forcefully he pursues her.

One piece of advice: Be absolutely sure of what happens, if it happens. You may end up destroying your relationship for nothing.

Answer 2

well i think its horrible to make a game out of the one you love, especially when your feelings are on the line. but it looks like you have to make a choice...lose all your billables (whatever those are), or risking losing your wife.

i dont think she'd be happy to hear about this little wager, but its probably in your best interest to tell her. you're playing with fire, and its time to put it out.