How do you break off a relationship, knowing he'll be deeply hurt?

Question

I hate that I'm resorting to this for relationship advice, but here I am:

4 year relationship, things aren't that bad. But he's been heading toward ideas of marriage and kids, while my heart really just isn't in it. A year ago I went through the same mixed feeling business, I planned on breaking eveything off, and so talked it out with him, and after only a few hours of being "broken up" we contacted each other, and got back together. Later on down the road, my boyfriend brought up that he had made plans to kill himself the night we broke it off for a little bit, but having me back changed his mind. Knowing that he has considered suicide in the past, I feel I can't leave.

Advice?

Answer 1

You need to do what is best for you.
Good Luck

Answer 2

He sounds unstable to me.........suicide just because a relationship went south. Leave now in the end you will be better off. someone that unstable has alot more baggage that has not yet surfaced. Be smart and follow your heart not your guilt over possibly hurting his feelings. This fear of yours that he may end it is exactly what he wants, how do you know it was not just a lie to make you stay. But if you want to stay insist that he go for therapy to deal with his suicidal feelings and inadequacy. Most likely the truth will come out when he refuses and he will admit that it was only a ruse to make you stay.
Then after his being caught in such a big lie you call break it off without any guilt and go have a life.

Answer 3

i will furnish you some "difficult love". you have to be a guy approximately this. specific, she broke your heart. specific, she gladly accepted money from you for issues and ran. No, she did not say thank you. it fairly is what happens in ruin-ups. If i presumed you writing your thoughts in an digital mail could help or carry you closure, i could propose you to achieve this...besides the undeniable fact that it is not going to assist or exchange an element. likely your digital mail will the two be deleted while not having been study, or it is going to likely be broadcast someplace for each individual to study. If the girl is dragging your call in the process the dirt, do you fairly need all those own thoughts published on a facebook internet site or emailed around to her acquaintances. you may definitely write all of it down as a healing exercising, yet i actually would not deliver it if I have been you. What you ought to do right here is decrease your losses and pass on. It exchange into 5 years, and it seems such as you place greater into the relationship than she did, yet you ought to recover from it...and purely time will try this for you. Use this as a studying experience. do not lend yet another GF money. don't be so trusting of the subsequent female. And information flash: if a woman is relationship you for 5 years and not often every person is acquainted with you're mutually...it fairly is a pink FLAG spectacular there! i think of you're purely naive whilst it includes relationships, and she or he took complete income of that. Be the bigger individual. do not say nasty issues approximately her or do to her what she's doing to you. Bow out gracefully and pass on with your life. Take something actual you have that reminds you of her - photographs, CDs, souvenirs - and positioned them away out of sight. do not wreck them, yet positioned them the place they are not consistent reminders of her. ultimately, don't get returned obtainable on the relationship scene till you're arranged to. do not permit others rigidity you into "getting returned obtainable" in the previous you're arranged. and don't make any destiny female you meet pay for the errors of this ex-gf of yours. dangle in there, strengthen up, use this as a studying experience, and pass on with your life.

Answer 4

Boy are you stupid or what. You get married and then he gets mad and if was seriously on killing himself, why do you think you are immune. Just break it off and do not waste your time. Tell him if you kill yourself, then that is the way it is going to be. And if he does do not feel remorse. Remember, everyone wants that person to tell the truth. Why should you be different? Think about it. What would you tell your gf in the same situation?

Answer 5

yea, usually anytime a relationship is broken off someone gets hurt

and are you going to stay in a relationship that you don't want to be in because some idiot says he will kill himself? i seriously he has the balls to commit such an action

your choice, but i would let him go and leave it at that

Answer 6

in the first place why do you have to break up with him because your not ready for marriage yet? makes no sense to me.... every time he brings up marriage you want to break up whats the big deal tell him your not ready for that yet and leave it go and maybe hes so ready for marriage that he'll break up with you. just because he said he was gonna kill himself does'nt mean that he would of really done it. and if hes that unstable then hes not ready to marry anyone right now. just my opinion.

Answer 7

Slowly stop talking to him if he tells you lets meet at the park or somewhre else you tell him you cant then you break up with him

Answer 8

i think that you should stay with him for a while and for ''dates'' you should bring him to a person who deals with people who want to commit suicide and after you think he is ready for the break up then you should break up with him.

Answer 9

Talk it over with him. Let him know your not ready to have a commitment like that with him yet. YOU DO NO HAVE TO BREAK THINGS OFF WITH HIM!!

Answer 10

Make it seem like its his decision to break up with you. Then he wont feel as bad about it.