After nearly two years, and the fact that he put me through hell I still think about him. I feel so lonely but I'd rather die on my own than re-live the hell he put me through. Will I ever be able to trust a guy and fall in love again? I feel so empty.
To complicate things my ex had kids and no seeing them hurts like hell still too!
2007-01-15 12:38:50 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i have the smae problem. yes, you will be able to love and trust agian. probably not up to same point, but you will be able to. forget about him (i know right easier said then done.) i talked to my counsler about it and she made me write a letter to him (one that would NEVER be sent to him and no one would read it.) hand write it and put EVERYTHING in that letter. (mine ended up being 40 pages long.) once youve finnished that letter, start another letter as if he were writting to you. (hard i know).
not every guy is like that. i met another guy (my current boyfriend) and he showed me how to love and trust. hes proved to me all of it. its more than possible. just keep your chin up! it works...i promise.
2007-01-22 16:29:58 · answer #1 · answered by Em 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you will be able to find love again. At least you have enough sense to know you will not be put through that hell again. The trust issue is a different area. I have been through the same thing and as great as my current boyfriend is I still have trust issues. But I am working on it. Things will get better, just give it time. Good Luck I hope everything works out for you.
2007-01-15 12:56:02 · answer #2 · answered by Redhead 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Dear Vony:
You have a lot of life ahead of you so it's much too early to think you will never trust a guy again. I too have a love in my past whom I can't get out of my head but it's been 12 years for me. I do trust other women but I'm always on my guard. This isn't acceptable to me but I'm trying to work it out now. I've dated most of these 12 years but I still can't get her out of my mind. I know I will never see or talk to her again (I've tried) so I go on with life.
You are young and there is way too many guys out there who will love you to the ends of the earth and you will find one and you can make your own kids that no one can take from you EVER.
Don't say you won't trust cause you are on this board and I hope you're going to trust what I have to say. If you do trust what I've told you, then you are trusting a guy. I know it's not the same thing but I am a guy I'm just older than the guys you'd be dating.
2007-01-15 13:17:48 · answer #3 · answered by Kevin A 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had a similar problem until very recently. You need closure. I do still think of my ex as we have a son together. Even after all he put me through I still love him and care for him but have distanced myself. I have accepted that if you love someone there is no switch you can turn off. You have to accept your feelings and put the past in the past. It took me years to do. I know what you are saying about being on your own rather than re-living the hell. I still keep my distance from men even those close to me. It will hurt there is no way around that. There will be someone that comes along and starts to break down those walls you have built to protect yourself and they will love you!
2007-01-15 12:50:13 · answer #4 · answered by itgirl23 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are enjoying it and hanging onto something truly ludicrous because it makes you feel more interesting and romantic. What are you without these daft 'can't forget you' thoughts? Empty. So fill up the diary (I keep saying it) and get busy. Charity work would do you good - other people have real things to worry about. I should imagine your friends are fed up listening to you going on about a boring ol' bloke so at least if you did something useful you would have something more interesting to amuse others with. If I sound harsh its because if you were my kid I would have sorted this out a long time ago with some ice-cream, a hug, and a few choice words!
2007-01-23 10:01:56 · answer #5 · answered by AUNTY EM 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This relationship isn't likely everywhere. too plenty drama. he's making an attempt to maintain you on the string for some reason yet a guy who sleeps around for 2 weeks and then needs you returned is immature and mixed up. How dare he make a scene merely considering you're dancing with somebody? He needs to enhance up and bypass away you on my own interior the technique. do not answer his texts.
2016-10-20 06:33:19 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you were in serious relationship then it normal for you to think of him at times, even after 2 years.You will always remember things about him, there will always be little reminders,like a song that he liked but you will heal, honestly, in time........
You will move on and you will meet someone to love and learn to trust again.There is someone in this world for everyone, no-one should live their life alone! Chill sweetie and learn to love again.
2007-01-21 01:21:00 · answer #7 · answered by bevalou 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know how you feel. my ex put me through sh!t too. i still think about him alot and i cant help but let the way he tret me get in the way of relationships. ive found a really nice, loving man now who adores me and i do him. im still scared that hes going to turn out just like my ex but hes helping me to move on, slowly. with understanding and love. this man was my friend for a while before anything even happpened with us. and although i still think of my ex i feel i am learning to trust my new man. its all possible with understanding.
(hardhartedharlots friend wrote this)
2007-01-15 12:53:18 · answer #8 · answered by hardheartedharlot 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you sound like you still love him and it can take a lot of time to get over someone hurting you that way you also loved his kids and that will get easier with time you will be able to love again and to trust again just take it easy coz there no magic pill that you can take to stop lovein them i hope this helps so stay strong hun it will get better
2007-01-15 12:46:11 · answer #9 · answered by boredstupid 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to move on, maybe take a holiday abroad. In time you will trust and love again, but in your own time. Don't rush into anything.
Email me if you wanna talk further :-)
2007-01-21 21:49:13 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋