I am 21 and moved back in with my parents (mom and step dad) at their request to help with childcare and such...my only problem is my mother is constantly going through my room she reads my journals and recently discovered and threw out all my sex toys...I am sick to death of this and it's the reason I moved out of her house when I was 17 b/c I could not take it ne more...she does not allow me to put locks on the doors and she has had locksmiths come in to open safes that I have kept in my room and I cannot store everything in my car...I would move back out but I would be screwing the rest of my family who I love and care dearly about...does anyone have any ideas.....it's also quite annoying because she makes a point of reading my mail and not giving me all of it (sometimes she holds it until it's too late and I owe late charges on a bill or something).......THANKS!
2007-01-15 10:57:22 · 15 answers · asked by Love always, Kortnei 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
The childcare is because my parents run a foster home for troubled kids and want someone who knows how to deal with them in the house...my other siblings are also around to help with childcare...I do not have any children of my own...
2007-01-15 11:26:34 · update #1
Okay everyone seems to think that I am not independent let me shed some light on myself...I am 21 I have a bach. degree and I am working on a master's degree..I own my own house (I am renting it out at the moment b/c I moved back in) the ONLY reason I moved back in was to help my parents with the kids.....I can support myself...
2007-01-15 11:45:28 · update #2
simply you need to move out. never mind taking care of everyone else you need to move out.sounds like she's a control freak and has you where she wants you.
2007-01-15 11:02:14 · answer #1 · answered by Pandora 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you paying rent? If so, I'd consult with a lawyer about the legality of you being allowed to have a lock on your door. Also, have all your mail sent to a post office box. That way she can't snoop. Do you *really* need to stay in the house? You said you came back "at their request" to help with childcare..who's kids? Theirs? Is your sanity, happiness, and well being worth going insane? Sometimes we have to put ourselves first and let other peoples' problems be their own, not yours.
2007-01-15 11:05:29 · answer #2 · answered by chnchita 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do not mean to make you mad. Sorry if I do. If your mother has the money to pay a locksmith then she has money to do other she needs to. If you had a safe with your name on it than most would not open it for her without some sort of paper giving her permision to open your safe. But you should be able to explain to her that you are here to help them out an if they cannot respect your personal stuff that you will not be able to kep helping out. Give a date that if things do not feel better by then you will leave. If she/they keep on then it will not be your fault that you leave.
2007-01-15 11:08:16 · answer #3 · answered by ronnny 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep private things out of the house...get a post office box for your mail, and move out as soon as you can. You can still help with childcare and not live there. That situation would be intolerable. Don't stand for it.
2007-01-15 11:01:05 · answer #4 · answered by . 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
in case you've tried talking to her - you likely gained;t get everywhere by attempting back - might want to a pal or relied on pal talk to her on your behalf - she might want to properly be extra vulnerable to hearken to some different person? i'm positive you've, yet have you ever stated (and executed) your own cleansing - if she doesn't have a reason to bypass into your room it can make it harder for her to go back up with a available excuse? there is no justification for dealing with your issues (except she has had a valid reason behind suspecting you of a few thing? - yet I nonetheless do not imagine it truly is a robust adequate reason) and she or he truthfully should not be negative some thing. i imagine you should do slightly bit harm quandary - %. issues away so she will't spoil them - save inner most issues with you or discover someplace preserve to placed them. i understand you shouldn't ought to do any of those issues, yet you gained't have a call till you could go away, if she gained't pay interest. in the different case - only get your self off to college (she will't provide up you) and concentrate on your destiny. sturdy success
2016-11-24 20:04:49 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she's trying to control your life. If they need help with younger kids perhaps you could suggest daycare or a live in nanny. I think you need to talk with her honestly and calmly. And then find you a place of your own. Don't let her control your life its too short for that. Good luck
2007-01-15 11:04:18 · answer #6 · answered by sweetie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow. that really sucks. umm, i recommend talking to yur mom about it. Make her realize that you're not a kid nymor. Mayb that's why she's being like this. She still thinks of you as her baby and duzn't think you can handle yourself. tell her how you feel and that you don't appreciate what she's doing and that your moving in out of the goodness of your heart and you deserve some respect
2007-01-15 11:32:57 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know it is hard to move on ,because of finances, & children, but in your case ,you have no choice.Run ,not walk while you can.I'm sorry ,but that is just flat crazy,you are a grown woman, tell your mom to get a life and to stay the heck out of your stuff,if she wants to no something,tell her to ask.Give you some space,and respect.Ummm that makes me mad.Your not 12yr.s old ,she needs to wake up & let you go.
2007-01-15 11:05:19 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a life and move out of your parents house....
2007-01-15 11:00:38 · answer #9 · answered by Federal Agent 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You don't have to live with them to help out with Childcare.
If you insist on continuing to live with your parents...get a storage unit to keep stuff away from your intrusive mom.
2007-01-15 11:03:54 · answer #10 · answered by chickieink 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋