what should i do when i gave up everything for my boyfriend- grades, friends, dance class, family, everything. but now after a few months i just dont know if i want to be it the relationship. he expects me to do stuff, he lies, breaks promises, and gets drunk/hing every week(which i dont do or aprove of) but i cant break up with him cause i have nothing back to go to. what do i do??
2007-01-15 09:51:23 · 20 answers · asked by Jen 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
First go to your family, because they are the ones that are supposed to ALWAYS be there for you... apologize and tell them that you now see the error in your ways...
Then go to friends and do the same thing..
Its only been a few months, so you can fix your grades to some degree, ask someone to help you, talk to a guidance counselor or a trusted teacher about how you can try to make up your grades... They wont be where they were but you might be able to improve the situation...
I dont know about dance, I suppose you can just pick that up again??? Maybe you burnt some bridges there, You could try a new place but its sounds like something you enjoy so you should definitely get back into it to take your mind off things... It also looks good for college (unless youre already there...)
Last but not least
Dump that asshole
you deserve someone much better who would respect and love you enough to not expect/let you make all of those sacrifices for him ESPECIALLY without him making some for you...
Next time you enter into a relationship look back on this and try to never make the same mistake again, people may not be as forgiving...
And if he says he's sorry and he will change, DO NOT LISTEN
Ive seen it happen so many times to some of my friends and their friends as well, the next step is for him to verbally and physically abuse you...
Youve only been dating a few months, youre both supposed to be on cloud 9 and feel as if you just want to be together every second... and nothing else
Imagine how it would be in two years if you got married... five? ten? Not only would it not last that long, but you definitely shouldnt want to marry him...
Dont worry
Someone even better will come...
Just be strong and remember family and friends...
2007-01-15 10:07:39 · answer #1 · answered by KMart 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since when do you have to be in an unhappy relationship just because you made the wrong decisions? NEVER! First of all, tell him that you see that you are two totally different people and deserve better. Then, mend those fences with famliy and friends. They may go off on you but you have to take that b/c of what you did. But if they were your true friends and family loves you(which i'm sure they do) then they will come around. If not, make new friends, that is always a plus! Then pick up on your grades and other activities in school. You will see that it will be alot easier than you think. Everyone makes mistakes so dont beat yourself up for it. But much more important, NEVER SETTLE! If you think like a QUEEN then a QUEEN you shall be. Keep praying and stay blessed!
2007-01-15 09:59:50 · answer #2 · answered by shay80800 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could have stopped right after you said he lies. If it on going and not just one of those little childhood lies like saying he didn't get you something when he really did then that's enough for you to approach him about it and if he doesn't stop dump his worthless rear. You don have things you can go back to, it might take some doing but you can. Dance can be started back up with money, friends, true friends won't judge you bad for what you've done and neither will family. They might give you a little hell over it but that's not so bad. Your grades can be brought back up with a little hard work. I know, I had the same problem when I got into my divorce.
Don't think you can't cause I know for a fact you can. From what you've said here, you are young enough that most if not all of your ills will heal in time.
Like Rob Schnider said in the movie "Water Boy", You can do it!
2007-01-15 10:18:13 · answer #3 · answered by Kevin A 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well to begin with you should never give up everything for someone you don't know if you have a definite long lasting relationship with them. If you don't feel that you want to be in the relationship then you probably should not have a relationship with them. I am sure your family will be there to support you until you can get on your feet again. If your boyfriend truly loves you then he should be willing to stop doing the things you don't like!
2007-01-15 09:58:20 · answer #4 · answered by teacuptiff86042002 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If being with him is making you feel like crap, the first step to recovering would be breaking up with him. Then you can build up on the life you once had- call up your friends, go for a night out, sign up for class again, find a job, study hard. It'll take a while, but you'll be back and happier than you've ever been with him ^^ Good luck!
2007-01-15 09:55:06 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't give up all of that stuff for your boyfriend. You don't even know if you want to marry, like you mentioned. He lies? Breaks promises? Man, you're going to get cheated on by him! Especially since he gets drunk. You might even get beat up by him if you get on his bad side (at least it sounds like that). Just choose wisely and don't sacrifice two of the most important things to you, friends and family.
2007-01-15 09:56:13 · answer #6 · answered by Speller188 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course you can break up with him!
Take this as a chance to learn about yourself--explore and discover life on your own, become independent, and find out who you really are! Be brave and you won't regret it!
In the end you really only have yourself to rely on, so learn to like yourself and know that you will be ok.
2007-01-15 09:56:22 · answer #7 · answered by Gen•X•er (I love zombies!) 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I just had to face this situation myself with my girlfriend. You have to dump him if he won't treat you right after all of this. Next time, remember that he will respect you more if you keep at least a little of your own life. Don't worry, you'll be able to rebuild your old life or start a new one.
2007-01-15 10:02:05 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to build up your own life away from him. Focus on your grades, dance class, family etc...If you think you can do it I'd reccomend leaving asap and working on rebuilding after. If you don't feel that you can do it, then stay and rebuild until your comfortable leaving.
2007-01-15 09:55:31 · answer #9 · answered by Amanda 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you can break up wih him. You will just have to start over. That is not a good reason to stay with somebody. I think your family would understand if you explained your situation.
2007-01-15 09:55:57 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋